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Original poster

Career or salary choice

11 replies

throwa · 19/11/2020 11:00

I realise that this is a very first world problem, but would welcome a range of advice on this.

Background: I am the sole earner (husband is self employed, but very variable earnings, he does house / kids etc, works very well for us). I am currently on a very high salary which keeps us comfortable, and means we don't have to worry about cash. I am 20 years into my career, and I have run large scale teams / am an expert in my field / etc etc. Obviously this comes with a degree of stress, but I am happy with this and my previous life choices to get here.

I have been offered the opportunity to apply for a 'sole contributor' role in my profession. It completely fits within my skillset, and I have done this in the past very happily. There is no line management and would be a relatively small / flat team structure. It would be 3 days a week from home 'once Covid is all over'. The other 2 days would be a 30m drive away.

I currently wfh full time due to Covid, but when things are back to normal again, it would be 3 days a week in central London (1.5h commute, train / tube fares). Given I went back to work 9m after having both my children I am very much enjoying (mostly!) being able to take them to school / be at home when they come in / be able to see them in the evenings etc. It was a sideways move from my previous role (redundancy situation, I thought it would work for the moment) but still a career role.

The new role would be a 25% pay rise. It includes private health insurance, very good pension contributions and 5 more days holiday than I currently have. It is in an industry which is booming as a result of Covid and I do not see this changing going forward. However it would pretty much kill my career stone dead.

The extra money would mean we could go on more holidays (when we can!), put more into savings (could retire sooner, children's uni funds etc), finish what we want to do to the house and garden sooner. Plus obviously give us a general buffer against Life Things.

What would people do in my situation?

OP posts:
ProtectedPeas · 19/11/2020 11:10

However it would pretty much kill my career stone dead. Why?

Original poster
throwa · 19/11/2020 11:13

@ProtectedPeas

However it would pretty much kill my career stone dead. Why?
I would have gone from running a department of 40+, Head Of / Director titles, to being a sole contributor again. It would look very difficult to explain on a CV, other than 'I wanted more £££', which is generally frowned on as a reason (even if it's true!)
OP posts:
Ilikewinter · 19/11/2020 11:36

I think i would take the new job, the fact it affords you the opportunity to spend more time with the family would probably tip the scales for me.

TotoroPotoro · 19/11/2020 11:42

I would definitely take the money and the time with family. They are excellent reasons to take up a new post. It sounds lie your talking yourself out of it due to potential future worries, rather than current real ones IYSWIM?

Just out of interest, how many years do you have left until retirement.

Do you think a bloke would be held similarly to account for "just wanting the money"?

TokyoSushi · 19/11/2020 11:45

@ProtectedPeas

However it would pretty much kill my career stone dead. Why?
Yes, why? Apart from this bit, on the information given I'd say take the new job. But the why part here is very important...
TokyoSushi · 19/11/2020 11:46

Ah cross posted. Take the new job.

Original poster
throwa · 19/11/2020 11:56

@TotoroPotoro

I would definitely take the money and the time with family. They are excellent reasons to take up a new post. It sounds lie your talking yourself out of it due to potential future worries, rather than current real ones IYSWIM?

Just out of interest, how many years do you have left until retirement.

Do you think a bloke would be held similarly to account for "just wanting the money"?

I am 20 years ish until retirement (42 but I hopefully don't plan to work past 62/64 ish)- potentially I could have another 1/2 'career' moves onwards and upwards. If I was say 10y to retirement, I wouldn't have a problem - I'd be off sideways chasing the cash!
OP posts:
ProtectedPeas · 19/11/2020 13:36

I'm not sure about this. Dh boxed himself into a corner with a choice he made, circumstances changed and ideally he'd have wanted to go back to his previous role - we just couldn't put a positive spin on it.

I've know this to happen another man. The frustration was the inability to flex and move again, feeling stuck. Dh just got over it and learned to embrace and thrive in his new role, the other guy I know retired after he'd attempted to get another job but he just couldn't construct a convincing story, at CEO/Director Level no one wants to take the risk if your story doesn't hang together.

Original poster
throwa · 19/11/2020 13:59

@ProtectedPeas

I'm not sure about this. Dh boxed himself into a corner with a choice he made, circumstances changed and ideally he'd have wanted to go back to his previous role - we just couldn't put a positive spin on it.

I've know this to happen another man. The frustration was the inability to flex and move again, feeling stuck. Dh just got over it and learned to embrace and thrive in his new role, the other guy I know retired after he'd attempted to get another job but he just couldn't construct a convincing story, at CEO/Director Level no one wants to take the risk if your story doesn't hang together.

ProtectedPeas - this is exactly what I was trying to articulate above, and although it would be great in terms of £ and I'm sure that I could just get on with the role, it would keep me busy and my brain engaged, I just can't quite reconcile that piece. Strategy / large team management is something which I really enjoyed, and I'm not sure I'm quite ready to walk away from just yet (and then I have a dire 121 with one of my staff and think, If I never have to do one of these again I'd be ecstatic!)

And then I think, does it matter if the £ is there?! Argh!

Thanks all for your input. It's good to get the different opinions.

OP posts:
RantyAnty · 19/11/2020 14:28

I've done this gone back and forth between IC to Director type positions.
It always worked out well.

They key was keeping engaged with my network. There have been enough opportunities for 2 lifetimes. I did more speaking engagements, sat on a couple of boards, and so on.

TotoroPotoro · 19/11/2020 19:12

I'm in a v.senior post that pays very well compared to my peers, and has excellent flexibility. That said - it is a bit boxed into a corner career wise. My peers are in more exciting posts that look better on cv, but they are paid about £20k less and have much worse t&cs. I've a similar length of time until retirement. I'm conscious that if I stay much longer I may not recover career wise.

But, that said, I've reconciled myself with it. I'm very lucky, it suits my stage of life (v young kids). I kind of need to coast for a little bit and it enables me to do that whilst bringing in a high salary. Once I've got a bit more headspace (kids at school) I will throw myself into it 100% and really push myself to take the next step. For now though, the money and flexibility work for me.

Hence why I'd take the job!

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