Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Work

Chat with other users about all things related to working life on our Work forum.

Husband isnt on board with my new job

6 replies

Soontobeworking · 12/10/2020 12:52

Hi everyone!
I have been a SAHM for the last 8 years.
Before we had kids, i didnt really follow a career, because i met DH when i was still in school and he had to travel all over with his job. I followed him right from the start and just took jobs here and there.
My kids are now all in school and i have started to look for a job. With my education and previous experience it isnt that easy, but i managed to get an interview in a boutique store.
DH was not pleased at all, because i would be working on weekends (2-3x a month).
Other than that the part time hours fit perfectly with the school hours and its very close to home, so it enables me to still do drop offs and pick up of the kids.
DH doesnt want me to take it, because according to him i dont "need" to work. My entire family didnt react enthusiastic, because apparently leaving my husband on his own with the kids on the weekends is the worst thing i could do. He is a very hands on Dad though and does a lot with the kids and in the house.

Im really unsure what to do now. I really want to take the job, because i really feel like i need something for myself. These last few months were tough and i need a change of scenery. I just wanna get out of the house more and do something with other adults.

Im not in the UK and we arent in lockdown anymore here, but we were for quite a while and i think i struggled a bit with the whole situation and im just realising it now (things are slowly going back to normal here, but social life is obviously still reduced a lot).

I think i was lucky in this current climate and with my (non) working background to even find a position that i would enjoy.
DH thinks i should hold out for something that fits his schedule better, since we dont need the money.

Is it wrong that i wanna do this, since i put my own career on hold for as long as ive known him?

OP posts:
Bringmewineandcake · 12/10/2020 12:57

I think you should definitely try it and see how it goes. It could be exactly what you need. If it doesn't work out for you then at least you've got some experience on your CV when you look for your next job.

user128472578267 · 12/10/2020 13:00

Take the job.

If he loved you he would want you to take opportunities like this. Instead of keeping you as his housekeeper.

parietal · 12/10/2020 13:00

take the job. it is good to have your own income and to build your CV. And it is good for your kids to see that mum's have jobs and to spend time with their dad.

BoulangerieBabs · 12/10/2020 13:01

Take the job.

I don't 'need' to work but my husband supports me because it improved my mental health and self esteem.

emptyplinth · 12/10/2020 13:27

Take the job.

Soontobeworking · 12/10/2020 13:59

Well i have already told them i will take the job. I was just second guessing, because of my familys reaction.

DH is actually really wonderful in every other way. He pulls his weight in every aspect and loves spending time with the kids. Hes just worried that our family life will suffer when he works during the week and i work on most weekends.
And he made sure im fully financially secure. House is in my name only and he has been paying into my pension forever. We also have a marriage contract that benefits me greatly if something was to happen. So technically i really dont need to work.
I guess he just doesnt understand that its for my mental health, because he doesnt know what its like to be stuck at home the entire time.
Before the whole corona situation i was perfectly happy, so he might also think its just a phase. Might be, who knows.
He did say if it means that much to me he will be supportive, but i can tell that he isnt excited about it.
But he might just need some time to adjust the the new situation as well.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page