Looking for some opinions. I have been acting up temporarily as manager for my team since the start of the year. Due to Covid etc. the permanent position has only just come up for applications. I submitted my application last week and expect to get an invite to interview sometime this week.
For the last couple of weeks I have been considering not applying but I was still unsure so stuck in the application anyway with the idea of thinking about it more. Reasons I don't want to apply are I don't actually enjoy the managerial/strategic aspects of the role. I enjoy acting as a technical operational lead and am good at that and supporting members of the team but can see I am not strong at the strategic aspect, seeing the big picture type of stuff. I have had to stay involved in the technical side due to lack of resource but can see when the role becomes permanent I would move more away from that role as resource issues get addressed. I was flattered to be asked to step up, as I only joined 8 months earlier and these roles are seen as prestigious and are sought after.
Other considerations are I'm now 34 weeks pregnant and heading off on leave in 4 weeks, which I know is causing them a headache with the recruitment/cover situation. They didn't know I was pregnant when asking me to act up. I just don't know if I could come back off maternity and throw myself into a new role I'm not that enthusiastic about anyway while juggling 3 small children.
However, I'm a bit worried about how it will go down withdrawing at this stage. I'm not saying I never want to progress, but just feel I'm at a life stage that feels right for it. I'm kind of just going with what people expect me to do rather than what I want. On the other hand, I don't want to regret it. Argh!