Co worker time off due to mental health

[Happyfuture]

One of my coworkers has been off for weeks with mental health issues. He's been in for a week then off for a week consistently since end of lockdown. He's recently returned and is extremely quiet with anyone apart from the manager. Its causing an atmosphere and I've tried to be respectful of their needs as I dont like the idea of making him feel uncomfortable coming back. But he's made it so uncomfortable today that you could cut the atmosphere with a knife, it actually brought a dark mood to the team. Hes sat staring at nothing not speaking to any of us, until he's left alone with the manager. I dont know how to reach out to him and keep a positive attitude for myself as I dont want to become gloomy also. What tips do people have in helping me support him and make it easier for everyone?

is he getting any help from the employee assistance programme, eg counselling? This could help identify the problems and how he could possibly open up. I am wondering if conflict with colleagues is the cause? I have mental health problems caused by conflict at work and I also intend to minimise interactions as much as I possibly can.

We are a team of 4, hes had no conflicts at work. Everyone's very supportive as all of us have suffered some form of mental illness in our pasts. He came back for a day and went back off for a few weeks. Came back for a week, and I and others were concerned as he seemed to be displaying manic hyper symptoms, (hyperactive, extreme hyper talking, forgetting things he was doing whilst doing them. Pretty much bouncing off the walls) he says he's back to his old self now but then called in sick again the next day. Not sure how the company is going to help him tackle this. Unfortunately its now impacting other staff members annual leave as they are being called in to cover his sick days, and they rarely get time off as it is, and i feel its now affecting another member of staffs mental health also as they arent allowed to switch off from work as they always get called in by area manager as they live closer.

You just have to treat him as normal and ignore the weird stuff I'm afraid. Any concerns, speak to your manager.

Well if i was on annual leave i certainly wouldnt be answering my phone to work, its upto management to sort out adequate cover, especially as they know your colleague is likely to go off sick on a regular basis.

In your situation i think i would just carry on my working day as normal, if your colleague doesnt want to engage then leave him to be quiet, dont feel that you have to give him special treatment or get him involved in every conversation etc.

I appreciate that it does sound like an uncomfortable atmosphere but please try and hold in mind that it is just as unpleasant for him and he is not making it uncomfortable with intent!
I would say good morning, offer him a tea when it's my round etc all as normal, but don't go out of your way to force him into wider conversation because it might just be too much for him - there's no need to sit in stoney silence because he doesn't want to join in though.

I'd be saying a hard no to my manager about being called in on my annual leave though 🤨

You have my sympathy, we have a very similar situation at work too. I wish I new what the answer was. Our management have been good, they've offered the colleague flexible hours, wfh, they've even had an Occ Health review but the colleague isn't taking any of the offered support. Try as hard as we do it does affect everyone else too, it's very difficult working next to someone whose mental health is visibly struggling and they make comments and send messages to everyone about how awful work is and how stressed they are. I know they very much don't mean too but it creates a difficult atmosphere in the office which is starting to affect everyone else.

I think that you should speak with your manager about this.
She/he should be acknowledging the affect this is having in the team. I don't imagine there's anything practical they can do day to day, but by just saying that yes, it's not as jolly as it usually is, at least you and the team will feel as though your wellbeing at work is being noted.
And the manager should definitely be doing something about annual leave. The very last thing they want is more stress within the team. And they should want to avoid any risk of resentment building against your ill colleague.
As to your colleague, I think the ball is in their court. Carry on saying hello, include them in tea rounds and lunch invites. Ask them how they are today. Smile at them.

Thank you everyone, it is causing a hint of resentment at the moment. After being back for 15 weeks and they've only sporadically worked 4 out of them in small spats, it is having an effect on the team. Everyones concerned about this person and when in we always include them in everything, but when its met with stone silence it becomes increasingly hard to stay motivated throughout the day. When said co worker hasn't been in we all muck in together and work very well as a team, but when they come back it gives the team morale a beating as it can seem almost contagious. And after 3 or 4 days they go off sick again. They are seemingly living an OK life outside of work, going out with friends and shopping and going the gym, which is great and we are happy for them, but with all the shift covers the team has to pick up we aren't even able to do some of these things that they are whilst they are on sick leave. The manager has limited powers to do anything, as it has to go into the hands of the A.M and he seems happy with letting them go off sick on full pay, but i feel he doesnt understand just how it is affecting the team on a daily basis. So many people have lost their job due to covid and would kill to have a position and salary each of us get, and would work so hard to maintain the position and maybe my simmering feelings of resentment have me thinking the job position should have gone to someone who would really try to work hard, which makes me sound so horrible, and I feel so guilty thinking this.