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Original poster

Boss has turned on me

20 replies

seaside22 · 03/04/2020 07:05

So I've been wfh the last few weeks, my work load has increased and my boss isn't being very supportive. He's not a fan of us girls working from home as he feels as we have children it can't be done. It can but just not with his expectation.

I've told him a few times and he's not listening. He refuses to and now this week has been hell.

We have group chats every morning - last week it was very quiet and one of the girls who is my closest friend - said he told the others I was too busy. Basically he's leaving me out which sounds really silly coz I'm a grown adult but that's exactly what he's doing. He's arranging chats through house party without me on it, and even went to the extreme of starting a new group chat ?!

That's all fine with me as but I don't think the way he is behaving is very nice at all.
Even my friend said the same.

He's very unprofessional with the girls, talked about vulgar things which to be fair the other 2 girls join in. Not the one I'm quite friendly with. So it's not that I'm not involved in that chat I just don't think it's right.

It's a small company with no hr and since wfh I'm seen him in another light.

I'm not sure I can carry on when I don't feel I have any support in my role, being left out of the office team, but yet he expects me to do work that's not ever going to get finished in my working hours I do?

What shall I do?

Thanks for any advice - never been in a position where I've been made to feel like this

OP posts:

Reginabambina · 03/04/2020 07:08

See a lawyer.

TroysMammy · 03/04/2020 07:11

Update your CV.

Original poster

seaside22 · 03/04/2020 07:31

I'm tempted to hand in my notice and yes I feel that strongly

I can't afford legal advice but there is acas so they maybe able to help?

But I have to work 4 weeks notice

OP posts:

ilovemydogandMrObama · 03/04/2020 07:36

Think you need to be practical - if he is shutting you out, then under normal circumstances, yes you should definitely act on it.

However, if you hand in your notice now, think about your line of work and how many opportunities there will be for companies to go through the interview process, hiring and training all remotely, offering new starters to work from home with children.

I am not saying not to make plans, but think about it practically.

copycopypaste · 03/04/2020 07:39

Have you got a HR dept?

I'd address it directly to him first and back up the conversation with an email. If it doesn't change, then take it to HR.

Kapsauss · 03/04/2020 07:46

I would confront him. Not in an aggressive way, but assertive, but yet professional way and call him out on his bullshit! If he starts playing it down or starts gas lighting ("Oh you're imagining it!", making you feel like you are over-reacting or just plain crazy), then just say that I am having this conversation only once and it is not a place nor time for him to start getting personal. Its a situation caused by him and he has to remember that you too as an employee have rights to a positive work environment.

Twickerhun · 03/04/2020 08:02

Does you boss have a manager? You need to record what’s happening as factually as you can. Decide what you want to raise with your manager directly and challenge him professionally about his management of your workload. If he doesn’t respond go to his manager with yo records of what’s happened and his behaviour. Ask his manager to review it either formally or informally. If that doesn’t work you may have to quit. I don’t think a lawyer can do much for you but you need to challenge him properly before seeking legal advice or doing much else.

SoloMummy · 03/04/2020 08:11

If you can't afford a solicitor, how can you afford to resign?

I would personally, just continue. If he puts too much on you, in email, simply state is this or this priority as both cannot be actioned this week/day etc.

Original poster

seaside22 · 03/04/2020 08:29

He is the owner of the company !
So no option possible unfortunately so I think I will have to hand my notice in because it really is unbearable !
No hr department exists there

@SoloMummy solicitors are £50 an hour minimum? So it would cost me thousands ! And I can get another job even if I just go and temp or care work which I used to do there's always work it's just not the line of work I was in or want to do but to be honest that doesn't matter at the moment it's just about getting an income
I only need part time which is what I currently do

OP posts:

TopShelf · 03/04/2020 08:36

No harm in getting advice from ACAS like you suggest, op.

They should give you guidance on the options at least.

PenelopeFlintstone · 03/04/2020 08:39

If you liked the job before you started wfh, maybe just keep going as in a while you’ll be back in the office as before and things could settle down. If you didn't like it that much before, then that’s different.

PersonaNonGarter · 03/04/2020 08:45

Do not hand your notice in.

Take detailed notes of the times/dates/meeting that you were and weren’t invited to.

Record the inappropriate things he says.

Just because he is the owner does not mean he is above employment law. If you are fired you can claim.

nowlook · 03/04/2020 09:50

What does he say when you raise the issues with him? You say he's not listening; is he responding at all?

Original poster

seaside22 · 03/04/2020 10:05

Yeah true

I didn't like or before but it's just highlighted it hoe unprofessional he is

It's all over what's app so it's difficult because he replies to certain questions
So not completely ignoring just choosing not to answer some things

OP posts:

YangShanPo · 03/04/2020 10:15

I think you would have a case for unfair dismissal if he tried to get rid of you over WFH reasons in the current situation. So just carry on as best you can. Try to keep evidence you are doing a reasonable amount of work and any evidence of him mistreating you.

Your other option might be to ask him to furlough you if your job can't be done to his standards WFH, but you would only receive 80% of wages that way, but might be better than putting up with him treating you badly.

Original poster

seaside22 · 03/04/2020 11:12

I don't think it's possible to stay I know I should but I just can't cope

He said he won't be using furlough
He thinks it can be done so he's not laying anyone off

Thanks anyway guys I just feel doomed and horrible time to leave but I just cannot do it any longer

OP posts:

BubblesBuddy · 03/04/2020 11:20

You are not really looking at the risks of getting another job at the moment. Yes, he is unnacceptable. However, you are being paid. If you have full pay you might even count yourself lucky at the moment. Working from home is a bonus and keep trying to do that. You are not redundant.

You, presumably, have a reduced chance of getting covid1 by working at home. Working in a care home/care will require you to get child care. You might find residents or those needing care have the virus. You would greatly expose yourself to the virus and possibly bring it home. It is very different from your current position. I would put up with this boss until this is over. Then re-evaluate. If he makes you redundant, then get another job.

Original poster

seaside22 · 03/04/2020 12:28

Yes I know what you are saying but it's easier said than done

It's isn't possible to carry on doing the role I'm doing this is what I'm saying
I would if I could but I can't physically do what he is putting on me

I wish I could do that but there's too much pressure

OP posts:

BubblesBuddy · 03/04/2020 14:39

I’m just saying that there are other pressures lurking elsewhere. I get that you are between a Rock and a hard place. I just feel you need to weigh everything up. If you have, and you know the risks of resigning, then do what’s right for you.

Original poster

seaside22 · 03/04/2020 15:17

Yeah I get what you mean I sure am.
Yes it's rubbish for me but know a lot more people are in worse situations and yes I do have an income but he's making my life a misery 😞

OP posts:

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