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Boss dislikes me?

14 replies

Lala2989 · 26/02/2020 10:13

So I've been at my current company for 9m after being made redundant whilst on mat leave from my previous company.

I started as a part time staff member , although my previous role was managerial, this fitted with my family life. I really enjoyed the job, could see a long career ahead of me etc... my manager was on long term sick, had worked directly with them once. Many staff had stories of how said manager was a character, and not to get on the wrong side of them. Brushed it off, didn't plan on getting on the wrong side anyway, I've always got on well wherever I've worked.

Shortly after the manager returned from sick leave, the opportunity came up (4m after I started) to step into a managerial role I took it. They weren't overly supportive, but other managers were and so were the staff.

Witnessed a couple of incidences where said managers "character" came out, but it wasn't directed at me so I ignored it.

The more I learned about the role, the more processes I found weren't being followed (cash, stock/inventory management etc) the more I felt the manager was covering something/a few things up and being dishonest. I'm very much of the mindset, if you see a problem and don't raise it then you become part of the problem (guilty by association).

Anyway, a few weeks passed and it was eating me up. I went to my area manager and explained everything. They agreed something wasn't right and would look into it. I said my manager would make my life hell if they found out it had come from me, they were intimidating, manipulative, a bully.

I went on a weeks hol, my manager removed me from the manager whatsapp group, and cancelled our meeting.

I come back from hol, added back to group (they never remove people from the group even when on holiday), first day back I get called into the office and told a staff member is leaving because of me. Spoke to said staff member, they said I had annoyed them once or twice but i wasn't the reason for them leaving, it was a mixture of things and they'd been offered a new role closer to home with more hours.

Am told I'm on my phone too much (discussing with a colleague and/or area manager the issues I'm having) so make conscious effort to not have my phone on me.

Manager literally ignores me on every shift, fine. Just get on with my job. Trying to make things as less awkward as possible. Sometimes they're ok, sometimes they're not. Playing mind games. Humiliates me in front of staff members about my lack of planning, despite having to constantly change my plan and being micromanaged (if I'm running shift, let me do it my way).

My other half got a new job, meaning he's going from nights to days, so I handed my notice in at work.

First shift back I get called into the office, and the long as short of it is that all the managers dislike my behaviour, my attitude stinks/has changed, I'm a backstabber, untrustworthy, etc... two of the managers were supposed to be coming to my hen party next month?! I classed them as almost friends not just work acquaintances...

I've got 3 weeks left. But I'm dreading every day. Anxiety levels are through the roof. If I leave now and don't work my notice, will that reflect negatively on me?! Am I a wimp if I go to the gp and ask to be signed off with stress?

OP posts:
fara20 · 27/02/2020 11:07

Hi

For what it's worth I don't think you are a wimp if you go to your GP. The place sounds very unprofessional and I'm sorry they have treated you this way. I'm not at all surprised your anxiety is high.

CorianderLord · 27/02/2020 11:39

I'd ask for garden leave and make a complaint about bullying and manipulation and state that you believe something is being covered up. If possible go above TV e area manager.

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 27/02/2020 11:52

I would take a sick day for stress. Phone the area manager from home and let him/her know that you are being targeted and you will not be returning to work and you want gardening leave for the remainder of your notice otherwise you will consider a constructive dismissal claim. You might get negotiated down to just leaving and not being paid notice (meaning they agree not to pursue you for not working notice).

Whatever happens, don't go back and, if you can, make sure that the people you work with know why because the evil manager will be spinning them some tale that puts you in a bad light.

MzHz · 27/02/2020 12:32

Who in the office delivered all this heap of crap about how supposedly awful you were?

Have you had the chance to talk to these people coming to your hen?

Black77Bird · 28/02/2020 03:32

It sounds like a horrible situation to be in.

You could either:

  1. Ride out the three weeks - which would be torturous but will actually go quite quickly in retrospect; or

  2. Visit your GP and get signed off on stress leave (or similar).

The problem with 2) is that when your next employer calls for a reference, this will rear its head. You could explain it away - and most decent people would understand - but it is a risk that it could go against you when trying to secure a new position.

The problem with 1) is that you could tie yourself in stress knots and things could get even worse.

If it was me, I'd try and see if there was some way I could work from home to avoid all the BS.

Lala2989 · 01/03/2020 20:03

Thank you all for your replies!

I had been feeling better about everything, was actually starting to enjoy the job again and even contemplating retracting my notice.

Boss is on holiday so is no surprise that I'm enjoying the job again to be honest! I actually do love what I do.

However, today everything came to a head when I was told to do cash, despite the process changing and me not having been trained on it. I was the only one in store that knew the old process, so was expected to just figure out the new one :-/

My boss has banned me from calling another store for support and all questions have to go through him. Even when he's on holiday. So I text him rather than calling, not wanting to interrupt too much, (I feel a text is less intrusive if you are busy than a call). A text message came back "please call if needed" so I called him, explained where I was stuck. And all I got back was "you know this, just do it. You aren't going home till it's done. I'm in another store, with another manager, when I'm supposed to be on holiday, watching what you are doing and waiting for you to finish. Hurry up"

Cheers mate. That totally helps me solve the problem.

Anyways I sat staring at the screen for about half hour. Another manager come in and asked how long I was gonna be. I explained my issue,
He doesn't know the processes to tried to help but couldn't. I burst into tears when he asked if I'd spoken to the boss.

Boss called the store phone, other manager answered, explained I was stressed and confused. I then got told to get out of the office.

Sat in the canteen. 5mins later, the boss is coming in and he's fuming he's got to come in on his holiday.

So I gave them my keys. Made them search my bag, pockets coat etc and said I was leaving and not coming back.

And I am not going back. I know this will likely have a negative effect if I need a reference, and I know professionally it's not the right thing to do. But i honestly don't know what state of mind I would be in if I continued the remaining 3 weeks.

OP posts:
Lala2989 · 01/03/2020 20:10

@MzHz boss delivered it, formally, in a meeting both times with a witness. Neither time was I aware of the formal meeting until it was happening. And the first one he has told another manager from another store that he was conducting my disciplinary meeting. Although I still haven't had confirmation if it was or wasn't a disciplinary...

OP posts:
Lala2989 · 01/03/2020 20:12

Area manager is off sick.

OP posts:
HollowTalk · 01/03/2020 20:13

I think you should speak to a lawyer about constructive dismissal. That guy sounds absolutely awful.

CatEnabler · 01/03/2020 20:16

Constructive dismissal case if ever I saw one

MzHz · 01/03/2020 22:44

Oh wow! That’s absolutely awful!

Get legal advice now sweetheart! You have done nothing wrong. You don’t deserve to be treated like this

daisychain01 · 02/03/2020 06:45

So I've been at my current company for 9m after being made redundant whilst on mat leave from my previous company.

^ Please don't waste your money on a solicitor in pursuing a Constructive Dismissal claim. Why do people shoot from the hip rather than giving accurate advice! Constructive Dismissal can only be claimed if the claimant has 2 years' employment.

  • You need to have resigned citing CD and stating the reason CD applies (being some repudiatory breach of the employment contract).

You cant just throw CD into the mix after the fact, because it sounds like it might be CD!

Lala2989 · 02/03/2020 07:39

@daisychain01 it is usually 2 yrs, but I think that as I reported his behaviour previously, including his wrongdoings with cash & inventory management, this accounts to whistle blowing and overrides the 2 yrs as his behaviour now becomes "automatically unfair".

For the record, I reported him changing my figures on cash sheets to balance the books, failing to record/realise/ignoring the safe being -£280, putting £200 cash that a customer had left in the atm into the safe float to part balance it, putting £80 of customer donated charity pot money to balance the remainder of the safe, and for adjusting inventory to cover up theft and make the figures look more pleasing for end of year to ensure he got maximum bonus.

It was after (but during the same conversation) I discussed the above with my area manager, that I mentioned if my store manager found out I had reported him he would make my life hell, because he is manipulative, intimidating and a bully. Which is exactly what he has done...

I'm not chasing a constructive dismissal claim, for what it's worth. It has little benefit to me, and would be a drawn out process I imagine.

I do however think that maybe people above need to be made aware of how he behaves to stop him doing it in the future.

OP posts:
daisychain01 · 02/03/2020 08:34

it is usually 2 yrs, but I think that as I reported his behaviour previously, including his wrongdoings with cash & inventory management, this accounts to whistle blowing and overrides the 2 yrs as his behaviour now becomes "automatically unfair"

Your latest post, including whistle-blowing is rather a far cry from how you started your thread asking if your boss dislikes you!

On that basis and because there is clearly financial malpractice that implicates you personally and other important background info you may not have included I agree that you need to seek RW legal advice if you intend to progress a whistle blowing action against him.

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