Sex discrimination - going to talk to boss tomorrow - HELP!

[bohemianbint]

Hi,

I posted here last week about my boss being a total arse. I've since had some legal advice, and he is, definitely, being an arse.

I've been advised to go in and talk to him tomorrow in a firm way as a precursor to lodging a formal grievance. However, I'm really dreading it because he's a total pigheaded idiot and he gets a bit aggressive in his attitude when he's put out.

My cousin, who is a lawyer has offered to come with me while I talk to him. Thing is, it's a very small family business (only 6 of us and 3 are family) so its not like a huge company and there's only me and him in the office this week. It's not a formal meeting but it would be good to have her there, a) cos she knows what she's talking about and b) he might realise I'm taking it seriously and sort it out without it having to go to a tribunal.

Just not sure how to broach it if so! Any advice?

Cheers, will do! Am absolutely dreading it...

definitely have someone with you
a)for moral support
b) as a witness (just in case...)

your cousin sounds an ideal candidate and as you say will make him realise that you ARE serious, you aren't just "moaning" & will go away (which is what he probably thinks at the moment...)

Doesn't do any harm either to take notes during the meeting & circulate a written record of what was agreed - handy if there is any later back-tracking & you do end up heading for a tribunal.

good luck

But do bear in mind that your boss has the right to refuse to allow you to bring your cousin with you....

Hello,

Thanks again everyone for the posts earlier this week!

Well, to be honest, it couldn't have gone worse. I would have been better off putting in a grievance straight away I think.

Basically he was completely obnoxious and had a go at me for not "deigning" (his word!) to keep in touch whilst I was on maternity leave.

1)Firstly, this is a load of bolleaux. I did. And he said I did but "in a social capacity". What more does he actually want!
2) I did keep to all my obligations within the law regarding keeping him informed.
3) Whilst on Mat Leave, not only was I getting to grips with having a baby for teh first time, my house was burgled, my car was stolen, my two grandparents got ill and died within 8 weeks of each other and I filed for bankruptcy. Is it really any wonder I wasn't popping in every 5 minutes demonstrating that I was "a team player"?!

He then, slimily backtracked and denied that he had said that manual writing was no longer in my remit. HE then contradicted himself several times but the outcome is that he is saying that I can undertake projects "if a suitable one should arise." And I think we all know that it just isn't going to "arise".

He then asked if I woudl be prepared to work in Scotland. (I live in Manchester.)

So, I think the situation is that legally, if he sticks with his story then I can't do anything. I have to jsut stick it out on crap money til I'm up for review in Jan. He has been unfair, said some ridiculous things, and is going to get away with it.

I'm so furious. I wish that I could do something but I don't know what. Short of have 9 kids back to back to annoy the hell out of him.

Does anyone know if there's anything I can do? I just want to cause him maximum headaches now, as he's made it clear that he is beign very unfair, and can get away with it, and it's entirely personal.

bohemian sounds like a nightmare, have no advice but bumping for you

I would follow up with a letter that clearly sets out your understanding of the situation and send to him and file a copy with your solicitor/cousin. You are under no legal obligation to stay in touch with your employer while on mat leave afaik so thats a red herring.

It definitely sounds like you could have a case for reinstatement and the problem isthat the longer you sit and take it the weaker that case becomes. If your replacement is also earning more than you were for the same job and with similar quals you could have a case there.

Don't sit and take it. It won't get any easier if you let him walk over you now.

I wasn't following the other thread so I don't know all the ins and outs of it but it sounds like you need to put in a grievance regarding the fact that you've returned from mat leave to a different job. Sounds like a strong case to take to tribunal. Are you in a union? Is there a union you could join?
The whole thing about keeping in touch sounds like nonsense too. Sounds like your boss hasn't got a clue about employment legislation. What exactly did he want you to keep in touch about?
BTW, just checked in a law book and it clearly states that you have the right to return to work on conditions no less favourable than you were on before you went on mat leave. So if you're now doing a different job for less money you've definitely got a case.
Hope that helps!

Cheers guys.

Meow - there's no way I'm taking it, I just need to decide what I can do within the law! I've taken some legal advice but it boils down to the fact that as he's saying he now will let me do any project that I could complete within 2 days a week, he's pretty much covered himself.

I'm writing a "nice" letter as advised by my cousin basically stating that he said I couldn't do the work, then backtracked. This should hopefully cover me if he boots me out come January.

I am so tempted to put in a grievance over the way he handled the whole situation, he was very aggressive, rude and mentioned several things that were quite offensive and irrelevant. However, I don't think I have grounds enough for a grievance.

I'm still trying desperately to get in to the CAB, but it's a bloomin nightmare!

And can he actually suggest that I commute up to Scotland for meetings? Is that lawful?

Oooh, I missed that bit about your replacement being paid more than you. That's outrageous ! You definitely need to speak to a solicitor/union rep asap!!
If money's an issue you can actually send off the form for employment tribunals yourself. It's pretty straightforward. You can download the ET1 form online. If you're not in a union and you can't afford a lawyer I'd call ACAS for some advice and then just fill out the ET1 form myself (after lodging a grievance and doing all the things you need to do first).
Good luck!!

The thing about Scotland depends on whether it's in your contract to undertake travel. Some contracts stipulate that you will have to travel for meetings. If your contract doesn't say anything about it and you've never had to before then he can't make you start now.

hi bohemian bint, just back from my hols.
Sounds as though your cousin is giving you some decent advice. You do have enough grounds for a grievance certainly, so I would consider putting one in, it will be a complete pain for him and if there is possibility you might end up going further legally, you should have made sure you have covered this. I think I linked to the statutory grievance policy (v basic) in your other thread, but if not, check out the ACAS website or give me a shout back.
No he can't insist on you keeping in contact during maternity leave, he's just being obnoxious.
Commuting to Scotland for meetings, depends really what your contract says but it probably does say that's allowed, something like that is usually put in.

I think he probably can request you travel for work. My contract states I'm based in this office but may be required to travel for business purposes from time to time. My bad for not realising time to time meant long haul once a month...