Jobs where you can't "work around" DH's job...

[randomsabreuse]

DH's job is not particularly well paid and requires him to work 8.30 - 5 every week day plus 1 in 4 weekends and 1 night on call a week. 5pm finish is not reliable otger than 1 day/week. We have 2 DC, primary school and 1 yo.

Adding to the fun DC's school (the only one we could have "chosen" has only got wrap around 3 nights a week (and one of those is to 5pm). Tied to a relatively rural area because of DH's job. House borderline too small for an Au Pair and no local language college to attract one...

I want a job. We survive financially without me working, but more fun money (ski holidays) would be nice but I am bored and feel lacking any identity.

What jobs might work?

Qualified solicitor (law degree). Not currently practicing and would not go back to the field I qualified into (City) but would consider other areas if they'd work around childcare responsibilities.

Thanks

In-house legal teams are often pretty flexible

I work for FTSE100 whose in-house legal teams are largely populated by people ( mostly but not exclusively women) who are very clear about their working hours. Things like including the hours they are available in their email signature as well as video / Audio conferencing profiles.

They work very hard and in my experience always turn around questions in the elapsed time agreed. Contact during their workings hours only.

Works fine.

Not sure how they recruit but it's got to be worth contacting some agencies and any corporates which happen to be FB located reasonably near you. Avoiding a long commute would almost certainly make things easier.

Options I can see:

1. Investigate part-time nannies and apply for full-time jobs. I found a nanny for 20hrs a week for a short period through an agency although most nannies are not as interested in PT hours. FT gives you the most choice of what to apply for and after a certain amount of time you can apply for flexible working should you need it

1. Look for PT jobs. Looks like you could do something like 5x 9-2.30 (25hr week when breaks factored in) or possibly a couple of days slightly longer so up to 30hrs. Do job searches in your area filtered by PT throw up any jobs under 30hrs? In my experience these will largely be admin assistants/secretarial/HR assistants/reception jobs - but I am in big city so may be different

For either of above you’ll need holiday cover - nanny?

1. Pursue a school hours job - teaching assistant or pupil support assistant for example, or possibly office work in a school - look into qualifications or unpaid work experience that would help you apply for one of these

1. Work with DH to find him a more flexible job and then reboot your legal career with DH taking more responsibility for childcare

1. Self employed jobs - mother’s help, personal trainer, dog walker - the kind of things you can charge by the hour and choose your hours. Is there anything like that you have experience/interest for?

I think a lot hinges on why you want to work. Ask yourself why and then why again... once you’re really clear on your reason it might help clarify which path is better. There is probably no one path which is ideal but there might be one way that makes more sense than others.

Any Housing Associations near you? Lots are very flexible in terms of working from home/flexi 7am to 7pm/generous holiday entitlement etc.

Legal quals an absolute bonus and could be utilised during evictions/asb etc.

It’s sounds like you have the potential to earn far more than him. I would look at finding an area of law you want to work in, and then he can get a job that will work more flexibly around that, in a different location if you would like to move.

Teaching law in a college.
You could train whilst working, although you aren't paid for the work until qualified.

A lot seems to revolve around your DH’s job-must live rurally, he must work weekends and nights on call, borderline small house and money isn’t enough to buy a bigger house etc.

Would it be better if you moved somewhere more central and you became the main wage earner?

Governance for Multi academy trust? its term time only, your dh is home in the evenings when the meetings are, the minutes and other stuff fit into a school day easily and the hourly rate is good for school work which isnt paid that well in general.

DH works unusual continental shifts. 2 days on, 3 off, 3 nights on, 2 off, 2 days on, 2 off, 3 nights on.... its absolutely impossible for me to work round that really so I have to be a SAHM. We can get by on his wages and no benefits but it means few luxuries and very very rare holidays.

I honestly can't wait for the DC to be old enough to be left alone. Even if I just get shop or cafe work. It's been far too long for me to get into an above min wage job now.

Family will writing. You could go see people by appointment weekends/eves your DH is not working.

Drip feed - he's an equine vet and pay just flirts with higher rate tax.. still shit for hours worked though. Big issue with being an equine vet is that you need to be in a fairly affluent area to have a rota as good as 1 in 4 - which makes house prices problematic... renting is worse!

His is a far more secure/future proof job than anything I could get...

I'm looking at Civil Service type things for me but our current location sucks and there is a big salary/ house price mismatch anywhere computable!

DH's job is not particularly well paid

he's an equine vet

I suspect your version of being ‘not particularly well paid’ differs from mine!

Less well paid than it was - and hours vs salary can be well under £10/hour....

Problem is unless you have family backup it's tough to work around!

You could still work 9-5 type job - child minder or nanny?
If it would be worth it for whatever you get paid. Or work from home.

I’m a nurse, ex is police we have no childcare at all for shift times so I work 2 days he works full time. Pain when we lived together even more so now.

If you limit yourself to school hours it will be very difficult.
Have you researched local childcare, the after school club can't be the only one surely - childminder/responsible person who could come to your own home for a bit?

9-5 is only possible with some schools as a lot of them don't do full wrap around. DC1's school has until 6 2 days, nothing 2 days and until 5 on Fridays. Funnily the childminders who pick up from that school have no availability on those 2 days...

Will add Housing Associations to my job search!

DH would like to go part time if we can make the switchover work!

I'm a solicitor married to a dairy farmer, so understand about antisocial working hours. Is there a smaller firm local to you where you could work part time? I started with a very small local practice after having second child and literally did 18 hours per week while DC were tiny. You could change specialism into something more appropriate (not much call for mergers and acquisitions in small rural towns) and whilst it may not be the thrilling career you once had, it pays reasonably well and certainly covers more than childcare bills. I now find myself 10 years later working full time but still juggling the children solo. Smaller firms are usually very grateful for competent, well qualified fee earners and in return I've been given lots of flexibility with my working hours.

I did put feelers out with local firms pre kids and the general impression was not increasing fee earner headcount - just workload.

It's been a while since I practiced as I really did not enjoy city M&A once I started thinking about how irrelevant it was to anything other than earning lots of fees for bankers and us...

I'm most drawn to NHS/ civil service legal roles but they're quite rare in locations we can both work!

In-house. You just need to find the right company - I work for one, nice 6 figure salary and I can pretty much set my own working hours. Not just for us lawyers, totally normal for even MD to stand up in the middle of the meeting and declare he needs to go to pick up the kids. I can also bring the kids to the office if needed, or of course work from home when they're ill.

Thanks all - stuff to think about!

The biggest issue where we are is childcare - I think most people in the school catchment have not moved away from parents (several of the families in our street are related) so most people use family for childcare rather than paid childcare.

The problem is pick up from that school - nursery provision is available 8-6. Wouldn't have got the schools on the other side of town (4 x 1 form entry schools rather than any big primaries - so choice is very much an illusion unless you are at the edge of the catchment for 2 of them - we are 50m away from the local school!)

Holiday clubs doable - although slightly limited until Primary DC is actually 5.