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Original poster

Manager ignoring bullying and harassment complaints- next steps?

49 replies

Bakingbread123 · 07/10/2019 15:24

Hi all, I work in the nhs and I am not part of a union currently. I’ve worked in my role for 3 years and have made numerous complaints about a member of staff who works in a different department but whom I need to communicate with daily. I have all emails and written complaints to my managers. My manager selectively replies to certain emails and ignores others. She acts like she hasn’t received them and doesn’t respond to them. I have just sent another email outlining the bullying and harassment policy, the steps that I need to follow saying that all of these steps have been followed and nothing has improved. The next step is a disciplinary hearing for the person. I’ve mentioned unions and HR, I’ve mentioned my email trail and my diary of communication with this staff member.

I am scared to go into work because of this person. They are intimidating, aggressive and a pathological liar, who plays mind games. He has serious issues that include controlling women.

I swear I cannot be ignored again by my boss... who can I go to? I literally cannot go higher up and complain about her as this would make my job very uncomfortable. Managers can be bully's too and will just all stick together. Legally do I have a leg to stand on or shall I hand my notice in? We've had mediation and meetings with the person however he has a different manager and his manager and in-fact whole department are exactly the same. So his manager is not disciplining him so he is getting away with it.

OP posts:
MT2017 · 07/10/2019 18:04

So are you saying your manager is bullying you by not acting, or your colleague is in his actions?

Who would you raise a grievance against?

rollNsausage · 07/10/2019 18:22

You have four options:

Leave
Transfer
Complain higher
put up and shut up

Only you can decide.

PS don't threaten a union unless you are in one. And you should be in one. Mine have been amazing. But they won't help until you've been with them about 6 weeks.

WickedLemon · 07/10/2019 18:24

Have you formally raised a grievance?

HorseradishSnowflake · 07/10/2019 18:26

Definitely join the union. Is anyone else effected by his behaviour? Does it put patients at risk or could his behaviour bring his role/ department/ the NHS into disrepute? If so raising that in writing might prompt manager to act?

HappyHammy · 07/10/2019 18:37

Join a union
Speak to occy health and h.r.
Ask for a meeting with your line manager and independent manager, as for it to be recorded
Keep a diary
Go off sick with stress related illness, get support from your g.p.
Stop sending emails, you dont know who they are shared with
The bully being or not being disciplined is unfortunately not something they will share with you
Record any interaction with the bully, inform manager and h.r. you will do this. Have a 3rd person there if you have face to face discussion with bully
Read up about the grievance policy
Ask h.r. for a transfer

gr

gr

HappyHammy · 07/10/2019 18:39

No idea what gr gr means. If you or they are professional registrants you can call their advice lines or complain through them.

Moondust001 · 07/10/2019 21:57

Just to suggest another scenario - is it possible that your manager is refusing to take this further because they do not agree with you? If you are saying that this person, this person's line manager and everybody they work with - the whole department - are exactly the same, and you say that you can't go back to your own manager because "managers can be bullies" and they all stick up for one another, then the one consistent problem here could be perceived as you. I'm not saying that's true. I'm saying that this could be an interpretation that would be open to consideration if you are saying that literally everyone at work is a bully.

But no, "legally" there is really nothing you could do about this. You can't / won't raise a grievance. Mediation hasn't worked for you. And you have no right to demand a disciplinary, that that is assuming that they even think he's done anything wrong.

quincejamplease · 07/10/2019 22:03

What has he actually done?

Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:21

He makes threats towards me about me being in trouble for things and it’s not even true. He is just a guy from a different department not in a senior role or anything. Just bullying and picking on myself and others. Shouting at us in front of patients, throwing things around and ignoring us when he wants to. I have seen him tip a whole load of new stock into the bin because someone put them in the wrong drawer. Patients have made complaints about him as he has started on staff in front of them for no good reason. A doctor had to tell him to leave the ward because he was shouting at me and another member of staff. He tries to mostly get me alone and then creates things in his head that aren’t even true. I swear this guy is unhinged. But then the next day he will approach me to tell me off. Then the next day he will ignore me even when I say good morning how are you he will completely blank me. He watches my work from his system and tries to tell me I’ve done things wrong and people are angry with me etc.

It’s not just me he’s like it with everyone even my managers they all know what he’s like. The issue is my manager is never here, she’s gone part time and is only here 2 days per week so catching her for a chat is very hard. The reason it’s hard to ignore is because I have to work closely with him in order to do my job where as the other staff don’t they just see him on the ward but don’t actually need to work with him. I have no idea what’s going on with important updates because he won’t tell me. If I ask it will cause an argument. I need to know things or ask him questions but I'm scared to because of the response i will get. So we end up not being able to provide a safe service to patients and the rest of the ward staff come to me about the issue. What they don’t realise is it’s him who was meant to do this task but didn’t and I cannot do it even if I wanted to.

It’s so bad honestly. There are many colleagues who have had to deal with his behaviour but the difference is he wouldn’t dare say anything to them. I think when I started I was very quiet and didn’t know the job or department at all and he took advantage of this. He wants to control and bully but he’s very manipulative and clever about it. One day he would talk fine and then the next he would go mad and lash out. It’s like walking around on egg shells and everyone is making complaints about him but if his manager won’t do anything we are stuck. He is the same level as me by the way, just thinks he can try to intimidate me.

Another colleague who is close to the boss has spoken to her about the situation a few times. It’s hard because if my manager was walking past when he was having a shouting fit she would 100% stand up for me and deal with it. I think maybe she is very busy and my complaints are just another thing on her list. But to be honest a quick reply acknowledging my issue would be nice.

Genuinely if I am expected to work in this environment I don’t think my mental health can handle it any longer. But I don’t want to leave my job because of one person. I want a response from my manager and a next step of what to do... but she’s basically too busy. That’s the issue.

OP posts:
JoObrien7 · 08/10/2019 06:26

@Bakingbread123

What is your Managers actual title? There are lots of Managers in the NHS and I was married to one so I do know about the management structure. I would go to your Manager's boss and tell them you are being bulled by this person. If they ignore you email the Chief Executive ... this should not be happening and this person needs a verbal warning about their behavior or even sacking imho.

Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:28

@MT2017 him - but manager legally can’t ignore complaints of bullying it’s in the policy. She knows what he’s like but I think she’s really busy and this will require some time to sort out.

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Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:30

@JoObrien7 thank you for the advice I really appreciate it. It’s just ridiculous I work with people who I don’t like but I make sure to communicate with them in order to do our job. I also say hello etc. Because we are grown ups and work together. He is totally unprofessional I’m surprised he’s not been sacked yet.

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JoObrien7 · 08/10/2019 06:32

him - but manager legally can’t ignore complaints of bullying it’s in the policy. She knows what he’s like but I think she’s really busy and this will require some time to sort out.

What do you think she is being paid to do? Yes she is being paid to be a manager so she needs to be one and deal with this person now. They sound like they have some kind of anger problems or could even have mental health problems. That kind of person should not be working in the NHS.

Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:35

I’ve also tried the nice way being a friend to him and trying to understand where he is coming from with regards to the ward in general. But he can’t help himself he goes right back to his behaviour and then it starts all over again

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JoObrien7 · 08/10/2019 06:38

@Bakingbread123

I wouldn't be a friend to him - I would tell him bluntly that his behavior is unacceptable and doesn't he realise there are sick people here who do not want to see or hear him making trouble on the wards!! Sometimes you need to tell bullies exactly what they are doing wrong. If he comes back at you walk away and report him to security.

Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:39

My old manager before this one was so helpful with this situation however she left 1 year ago and my new manager is no where near as good. I don’t think she’s enjoying her role you can tell she will move on soon. She’s my matron but she’s doing two days matron and 3 days consultant at another joint trust. My band 7 ward manager is great and she has had the same experience with him. Maybe I will speak with her. She has told me previously to go higher so maybe I should consider that. The whole ward suffers because of this man.

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Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:40

My manager has told me to walk away from him and come and get her immediately but she’s never here and even when she’s here she’s rarely in her office.

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Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:41

@JoObrien7 I will do this today if he approaches me I will just tell him. Im sick of being pushed around to be honest.

OP posts:
JoObrien7 · 08/10/2019 06:43

@Bakingbread123

Is he a porter?

Because if he is he needs to be sacked immediately... don't wait for something serious to happen on the wards ... this man is dealing with sick vulnerable people and needs to be removed straight away.

Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:44

Yes similar position he’s from the warehouse

OP posts:
Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:46

It’s all men down in his department and it’s all women on our ward...

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JoObrien7 · 08/10/2019 06:47

@Bakingbread123

Right, in that case don't wait report him now. He will be suspended or given a job where he has no contact with patients or medical staff etc. I know my exhusband would have had him sacked if he knew about his bad behavior.

Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:49

I remember one patient told me she was going outside to tell him to shut up I literally couldn’t believe it. She had been with us for around a week and had seen and heard his shouting a few times and was getting sick of him.

OP posts:
JoObrien7 · 08/10/2019 06:51

@Bakingbread123

I would seriously think of contacting hospital security and have him removed from the ward. Do you have security at your hospital?

Original poster
Bakingbread123 · 08/10/2019 06:52

Thank you @JoObrien7 you have really given me the confidence to not second guess myself. I might approach my manager not via email but face to face and ask for a meeting to go through everything with our boss present also. The boss is a scary woman and will sort it out asap but I have to deal with my matron first before I approach the head of the department. But if suggest she joins us too she will see what’s been going on in her ward and will question why it hasn’t been dealt with sooner. This is a good thing

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