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Original poster

I shouldn't take this job, should I? Please talk me down!

51 replies

Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 12:33

Please help me decide what to do about a job offer that I've been waffling about!

I've been at my current role for 6 years and ready to move on. Applied for and have been offered a really interesting role but it involves a lot of upheaval and I'm not sure whether to accept. I'm flattered and would love to do the job itself but so many things 'around' the role aren't ideal - and I don't know if it's too much of a compromise. Would be grateful for objective input.

PROS

  • Really interesting and move into sector I want to work in (that I dabble in now but not 100% involved in) so good for career trajectory
  • Great team and think I could get on with them
  • They are small and entrepreneurial with huge ambition; would be exciting and I feel I could make a difference in the role
  • Able to make good contacts in the role for future opportunities
  • Really wanting a move so it could satisfy need
  • Would involve move to nice area of the country
  • Could be an exciting adventure for my family

CONS

  • Would be a drop in pay of 11k and reduced pension contribution - so drop of 500pds/month --- but I also accept that pay is less in this sector
  • Would be top of my scale so little opportunities for increase
  • Reduced management team from 10 to 2
  • Would involve a house move (house sale/rental) as its 3 hours away - I am happy to move for the right role, but do appreciate that it's expensive to move and a hassle. So there would be quite a significant cost associated with house sale, rental etc.
  • Not crazy about location of work/specific town it's in so would have to commute in and live 30mins-1hr away depending on schools
  • Local schools not great for DCs and most schools full so would struggle to get into ideal schools half way through term year; schools where I am are v good and DCs quite settled
  • If it doesn't work out I'd probably have to move for another role and it may be hard for me to claw my way back to a more senior role
  • I'm single so would be moving to a new area where I know no one and have no help/assistance (I currently have friends about who can help).

It feels like the role would be good for me but worried it may not be right for my family as a whole. ExDH thinks I'd be crazy to make a move for a role that pays less (although he understands making a move for a more senior role).

Grateful for any thoughts!

OP posts:
soccerbabe · 18/08/2019 12:36

I agree with your Ex. It's not just the drop in pay, it's the combination of factors - that schooling would be a headache and you would need to commute as you don't want to live in the town the new workplace is located, and that if the new job didn't pan out, it would be hard for you to find a job in the new location.

Aquamarine1029 · 18/08/2019 12:39

I'm sorry op, but the cons FAR outweigh the pros. I would not be taking this job.

Original poster
Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 12:40

I should add that I have talked to DCs about moving and they are fine about it in principle, although as with all moves, there is the unknown!

OP posts:
NoHummus · 18/08/2019 12:41

Such a huge drop in pay would put me off alone, never mind the other factors. I can understand the need to move on from a role you've outgrown, but in this case the negatives far outweigh the positives as far as I can see. Sorry.

Original poster
Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 12:42

Thanks Soccer and Aquamarine. I tried to be balanced in my assessment of the role so really appreciate your input.

OP posts:
sotired2 · 18/08/2019 12:42

why did you apply for a job meaning a move you didn't want to make?

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 18/08/2019 12:43

I wouldn't. I'd take a drop in pay for a job that was close to perfect in every other regard, and have previously, but there's a lot wrong with this one.

MrsSpenserGregson · 18/08/2019 12:45

I wouldn't do it. I would keep looking for other jobs though.

Original poster
Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 12:45

I'm partly scared to turn it down as worried I won't get an opportunity/offer again - it's quite a small sector and very desirable, with lots of competition for roles that get snapped up. But I shouldn't take a 'desirable' job if it has lots of associated negatives, right?

OP posts:
Original poster
Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 12:46

SoTired i'm more than happy to make a move for the right job and I threw my hat into the ring for this one, knowing the area but less aware of things like the schools, roads/commuting issues etc.

OP posts:
catlady3 · 18/08/2019 12:57

Any chance of renegotiating salary? If they're entrepreneurial? Not that I do this myself but probably best to make a decision not based on fear. You'll get something else if this isn't the one, but go with your gut in the sense that with these conditions around it, you probably should "burn" for this job. Do you?

MondayAlready1 · 18/08/2019 13:00

It sounds like you do want to be talked out of it IYSWIM. The hardest thing is that no-one can know if another opportunity like this will come along that doesn't have so many down-sides. Is the move into the new sector really worth all the upheaval and loss of income - does it matter that much to you? I think that's the question you need to address.

Also, does your ex live near you now - would this mean your children moving away from him or having less contact?

Original poster
Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 13:03

Hi catlady3 by burn, do you mean really desire the role? I'd LOVE to do the role and already started to put plans together - but all the other stuff around the role, from schools to location etc is a headache. I would jump at the role if I was more free to move and didn't have to worry about the DCs.

I should say the role is in a lovely town, sort of like a sweet market town, that some might find desirable but I've visited 5x now and just not jiving with it.

OP posts:
HeyMonkey · 18/08/2019 13:06

I don't think it would be the right thing to do with children still at school. The upheaval for them would be immense, and from what you say it would be a negative move for them.

Perhaps something to reconsider when they leave school.

Original poster
Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 13:07

HI Monday - the move into this sector is really important for me, and I've always said I'm happy to take a drop in salary. So in principle I'm excited about the role but not all the other stuff around it.

Before I applied I would have said that the role is the most important thing and I would make whatever sacrifice is needed including everything I list above. Now faced with having to make those sacrifices I'm not so sure! Funny that!

OP posts:
BIWI · 18/08/2019 13:08

Goodness no! Those cons are really serious ones. Definitely don't take it.

Original poster
Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 13:08

Also Ex lives across the country already. The move would mean a slightly longer journey, but he only visits every 6 weeks or so for a weekend.

OP posts:
Original poster
Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 13:11

Catlady - to your question about salary, the best they can do is top of the scale (they work to a scale structure) and that's what they've offered me. They are entrepreneurial but work to a scale structure which is signed off and agreed by a board.

Really appreciate everyone's input into this one!

OP posts:
ZiggyB · 18/08/2019 13:12

Might be worth asking yourself if you would take the new job if the pay was the same as your current salary? Just wondering if it’s mainly the money putting you off or the other issues. If the other issues, then no amount of negotiating will change that really.

HaileySherman · 18/08/2019 13:12

I don't think this sounds like the right move. I think you should hold out/go for a different job that doesn't have as many drawbacks. That being said, money is very important so taking less pay would be a HUGE negative for me, BUT money isn't everything. If you feel, everything considered, you would be happier in that position, then you should take it, as being happy at work is a rare and beautiful thing.

Original poster
Waferbiscuit · 18/08/2019 13:16

Ziggy - if they matched my pay I would be more amenable to it and still a bit worried about the associated issues -- but would feel like less of a 'mug' for taking a drop in pay and signing up to a lifetime of commuting round country lanes.

Hailey - I think I'd be really happy in the role but worried DCs would be unhappy, if just temporarily. I could make it work living in that town, I'm sure, as I've lived in different areas of the country, but the thought of buying a house there isn't really thrilling me!

OP posts:
Oblomov19 · 18/08/2019 13:22

Doesn't sound promising to me. If they want you they'll pay more.

ZiggyB · 18/08/2019 13:34

the thought of buying a house there isn't really thrilling me!

You don’t seem convinced Wafer. It doesn’t sound like a great move for you tbh.

Didiusfalco · 18/08/2019 13:40

You don’t sound convinced. I think there are too many cons, and if you didn’t love it as much as you expect to you could really regret it. Hang on for a better role.

growlingbear · 18/08/2019 13:49

No way would I take such a huge reduction in pay. The idea is to get richer, not poorer as you get older. (bear in mind teens are much more expensive than children. They constantly want money for cinema and pizzas, sports kit and overseas school trips. They grow three sizes in one year etc.

You will resent the lack of money and the drop in responsibility. Unless there is a clear upward trajectory in the area in your profession, why risk it?