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Starting maternity leave early because work is terrible

10 replies

katmarie · 12/08/2019 21:31

I couldn't think of a snappy title sorry! I'm due 16th October and I had originally planned to start my maternity leave around 20th September, with 2 weeks holiday to use then maternity leave straight after. I only get statutory mat pay.

However the last few weeks at work have been utterly crap. We've had a number of important staff leave, right at the start of our busy season. One of the people who left a few weeks ago was my direct colleague, she and I shared management of our accounts, and when she went, there was a vacancy for a couple of weeks. She was then replaced by someone brand new to the business, who is still learning the job.

So we're short staffed and I'm supporting someone who is learning the role, albeit she is doing well. I'm utterly overwhelmed with work as a result, as are my colleagues. I have customers not getting their services and chasing me as a result, mistakes being made, I'm taking double the number of phone calls I usually have to, and I'm going home with work still piled up to do. Basically I'm getting more and more behind and it's miserable.

I've discussed with my manager several times how much I'm struggling. I get the impression they have been told to resolve the problems any way they like which doesn't involve spending money. So no extra staff, no overtime, etc. No replacement cover for my mat leave has been recruited yet, interviews are next week. They've known I was pregnant since I was 12 weeks, so not sure why it has been left so late.

I got to the end of my rope last week when I was told that an error made when I was on leave would go against me for reporting purposes, (which has an impact on my monthly bonus). It would never have happened if we had enough staff to cover planned absences which mine was. I've emailed HR to tell them I want to start my mat leave asap. With the amount of holiday I have owed to me, I could go at 34 weeks, and actually finish in the office on Wednesday next week. Part of me can't wait to get out of the hellhole, and part of me thinks it's just horribly unfair, both on my colleagues who's lives will become even more miserable, and on me, because I effectively feel pushed to go because of how much work is impacting on my mental health. So I'm torn, although my team managers are pushing quite hard for me to stay on, they're not offering any actual solutions to help make it easier, and I don't know if I can put up with another 5-6 weeks of things the way they are. I'm waking at 4am, crying in the evenings, struggling to focus on anything except the nightmare that is work at the moment.

I feel really angry with and totally let down by my company who go on and on about what a positive family friendly company they are, but have failed to support me to be able to take maternity leave when I want to, rather than feeling like I have to for my mental health. So do I go, and take mat leave early even though I don't want to and it will have a negative impact on our finances, or do I somehow stick it out knowing it's going to be a nightmare and will make me utterly miserable for the last few weeks of my maternity leave?

OP posts:
katmarie · 12/08/2019 21:31

Sorry that turned out so long, thank you if you made it to the end :)

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Countrylifeornot · 12/08/2019 21:34

Sounds hellish, get a GP note and go off sick with stress.

thinkingaboutthinking19 · 12/08/2019 21:38

I'm sorry you're having a tough time with work.

I'm due around the same time as you and had originally planned to finish work at the end of September. I have brought my mat leave forward two weeks as I've been struggling with the driving required for my job. I too am a bit worried about the financial implications but at the end of the day I decided that my heath and the well-being or or unborn child must come first!
With my daughter I finished work on the Friday and she was born on the Sunday (had to be induced). So I'm looking forward to hopefully having a bit of time before number 2 arrives.

In my opinion if your job is causing you to be stressed and miserable then I don't see why you shouldn't start your leave early. They don't seem to be offering you any support and right now you need to prioritise your own health and well-being.

They will manage without you - it may give them the kick they need to be kore organised in future.

I hope you are able to relax and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy!

neverornow · 12/08/2019 21:45

Get signed off by your GP. It's not worth the stress.

LatteLove · 12/08/2019 21:48

If you get decent sick pay I’d get signed off
If not then start mat leave early

MynameisJune · 12/08/2019 21:51

By law if you’ve already agreed a date then you have to give 28 days notice to change your start date. So they might say no especially given the issues. Just be aware that they don’t have to agree to change it.

ThisIsMeOrIsIt · 12/08/2019 22:00

I'd go off sick with stress first, until your mat leave automatically kicks in (can't remember what week that is).

I went off a month earlier than planned due to a horrible boss but wish I'd just gone sick as the part would've been better. But it was the best decision I ever made not to be there during the last two months of pregnancy. I actually got to enjoy it rather than being in tears and feeling sick with nerves every day.

katmarie · 12/08/2019 22:41

I get statutory sick pay so not great but it definitely is an option. I gave the 28 days notice to change my mat leave, it's just whether they will let me do that and take the holidays I'm owed up front before I go. These are holidays I've not been able to take due to us being short staffed, which is why I have so much to take. I'm wavering towards just going and focusing on me, I just resent the situation and not feeling like it's the choice I wanted to make if that makes sense.

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JuneSpoon · 12/08/2019 22:48

Don't forget that by starting maternity leave earlier you will also have to come back earlier.
Your reasons for wanting to go are valid but I would consider stress leave as suggested by pp

katmarie · 13/08/2019 14:10

HR pulled me into a meeting this morning to try and get this sorted. They have been really wonderful, more concerned about me and how I'm feeling than anything else, which was nice. They've said there isn't a lot they can do about the workload situation but they can tackle the pressure I'm getting from my managers to stay longer, and they will take action for me tk stop that happening. As far as HR are concerned if I want to go early I can.

So now I'm just waiting for them to confirm that with my managers and see if the management team come up with any amazing miracles to lift the pressure on the team in response. It's unlikely that will happen, but management have been in huddles and meetings all morning so we will see... as things stand my last day in the office would be wednesday next week, and tbh that is such a relief that I'm pretty sure I'm making the right choice.

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