Thinking about becoming a sahm

[Oopsydaisybelle]

Hi- I currently work full time (4 days per week compressed hours) I do a really stressful professional job at mid management level with decent pay. I've got two young kids the oldest is just about to start school the youngest turning 2 soon. Husbands just about to move jobs and has a pay rise which now makes him the higher earner. We've done the sums and we could just about get by if I gave up work and we were no longer paying for childcare etc. On one hand I really want to do it for a year or 2 until the youngest goes to school then think about what to do next. I like the idea of being home when the eldest gets in from school and actually being there to do homework and make dinner and not constantly be rushing to work. On the other hand I have worked hard to get to this point in my career and it would be a big step back and we would be skint. What are other people's thoughts or has anyone else done this?

Well do you think you could give it a try for a year or two and see how it goes? Is your career the type you could get back into if you changed your mind down the line (maybe not the exact job but similar)?

I could definitely go back to a similar role although it would probably take a couple of years to get back to level I'm at just now

Once your husband has started his new job and been there 6 months (I'm guessing that's how long the probation period is?) can you ask to cut down your hours so you can finish before the eldest comes home from school? It means you would still be working at your level and a small pay cut so you wouldn't be skint

Only you can make this decision, but I chose to be a SAHM while my children were little. I was doing the accounting and record keeping for my and my husband's business, but all the work was done at home. In my opinion, the early years of a child's life are so precious and fleeting that I wasn't willing to miss them if I didn't have to. You'll have the rest of your life to make money and advance in your career.

I would look at reducing hours a little to see if that helps. It's not just your earnings now but what you will lose in pay rises and pension contributions. I felt I needed adult contact and my own identity at work too.

I've looked into reducing my hours at work but I'm not able to. I am able to take unpaid leave to allow me to take all the school holidays which would help. I feel like I'm missing out on so much with the youngest I went back to work quicker and I'll not be having any more so won't be off on another mat leave but I do also think about what a step back it will be for my future career although on the other hand there are only young once. Such a hard decision!

At the end of your life, which do you think you'd regret more? Not working for a couple of years or missing out on your child's formative years? It was a no-brainer for me. The fact is, a job is just a job, no matter what your field is, and you'll be working for the next 30 years, if not more. Your children are little for a blink of an eye.