looking for some advice from HR peeps regarding the handling of my informal complaint to my line manager.
After a horrid appraisal meeting with my line manager, who I will call Sally, in which Sally pretty much ripped me apart - accusing me of lots of things I hadn't done, leaving me sobbing and shaking, I sent Sally and email with her manager (Bob) cc in.
In my email, I complained about the handling of the meeting. I advised I had not been given any indication in advance that something was wrong, that many of the things she accused me of were untrue, and asking for clarification on several things she had mentioned that confused me. I explained that the meeting had led to me having a panic attack and sleepless nights over the weekend (it was a Friday and I sent the email on a Monday)
As I said, Bob was cc in. I sent him a separate email asking if he could read it and if we could meet alone to discuss.
3 days passed, no response. I emailed Bob again asking again for a meeting. No response.
Sally responded on the Friday, denying saying what she did say, not answering some of the questions I had asked, and blaming my "poor performance" on my disability.
Upon reading that email, I had another panic attack at my desk. I went home (this was lunchtime) and emailed Sally to say I was self certifying to concentrate on my mental health. I subsequently got signed off sick by my doctor and I am now in month two.
on the Friday pm, Bob finally emailed me back to say sorry but he couldn't get into his email? He was sending other emails! He also deferred me to Sally's response which upset me as it seemed he either hadn't read her response or agreed with it! I responded simply to advise my doctor had signed me off sick and that due to the nature of my ill health, I wanted all contact from there on to be from either him or HR
3 weeks into my sick leave, Bob got in touch again to offer mediation (which I refused saying that I felt harassed and discriminated by her and that I did not feel it would be beneficial to my mental health - they have known for several years that I suffer from anxiety among other disabilities). He also said he would refer me to Occupational Health and I responded agreeing to this.
week 4 - had my OH meeting. Occ therapist agreed I'm unfit for work "until matters are resolved".
week 5 - start of my second week of sick leave. Bob emails me asking for a 'wellbeing meeting'. Bob includes a discriminatory comment in this email - basically asking me to do something that I physically cannot and he knows this. I respond cautiously, not refusing to meet, but saying it would depend where, when and who with and reminding him that I am signed off sick. I also requested reasonable adjustments if there was such a meeting - pointing out to him that repeated reasonable adjustment requests had not been met and reminding him again of what my disability is.
week 6 - no response as yet from Bob to the above. No one from HR has been in touch at all. I have spoken to ACAS who expressed surprise given that my complaint is about discrimination, that no one from HR has been in touch yet or gotten involved. The ACAS adviser feels it should be handled formally and I'm now wondering if I need to raise a formal grievance due to the time it is taking to resolve matters informally and how the informal complaint is being handled.
So really what I want to know from you HR peeps - is this length of time normal? Is it being handled properly? Should I now go down the formal route? Should it be formal approach? And how do I make a formal grievance anyway - I'm scared of the stress involved and the chances of success but this treatment has been ongoing for years and my manager's behaviour is really the last straw.