Worried about going back to work

[jonah75]

Hi
just need to get this off my chest really.
My DD is 4 1/2mths and due to a change in circumstance (DH has been made redundant!) I have to go back to work sooner than anticipated.
I'm now starting to get worried about returning to work as DD is very mumsey at the mo and won't stay with anyone else for more than an hour or so.
She crys and crys until she foams at the mouth and is inconsolable, she'll then sob for an hour at least when she's given back!! Making me feel really guilty

I find this really sressful as apart from this she is a really sunny baby and is happy to be cuddled by other people as long as i'm not out of sight for too long.
She is also BF and it took us a long time to crack this as she had tongue tie. Sooo.. i'm reluctant to give this up, plus (i never thought i'd say this after the pain at the start) I really enjoy BF

DH is looking for another job whilst also trying to set up a business but untill new job/ business is up and earning money i need to go back to work

i'm lucky that i can do nights and DD is starting to get more of a routine and will sleep from 2030 untill 0600 most nights but last night she woke not long after going down and DH went to her and she wouldn't settle with him and was very distressed, and had to go on the boob again. It took a long time to settle her.
i'm just worried that i'm going to go off to work and DD is going to be bawling her eyes out with DH. (I don't think she'll stop crying as she managed to cry for 3hrs in the car non stop!!)

Please help.....! I know i've got to go back to work but how can i make it easier on us all????

I do so feel for you.

Can you try simple things (if you do go back on nights) like expressing your milk for dh to give to her and keeping maybe a jumper of yours for dh to put in her cot to smell you if she won't settle.

A lot can happen in such a short space of time - by that I mean, this clingyness won't last forever and your baby will soon start to accept your dh settling her more, especially if he does lots more of it now whilst you're still around as back-up.

Good luck.

Hi Emma
Thats a good idea, i'll give it a try.
DH finds it really difficult to persevere with her, i keep reassuring him and encouraging him but i find it really hard not to jump in and take over when DD is sobbing her little heart out
She went off well tonight hopefully it will last but it was with just me as DH still at work.
The bottle is a whole other tale, she flatly refuses to take it!
My boobs leak when i feed so i collect that and have been trying that in the bottle but, she won't suck just lets it sit on her tongue with her mouth open.
My lovely sis went out and bought some alternative teats but none seem to work I got a soft sippy cup one which she will take in her mouth at least but she won't suck it. I'm going to my mums next week and plan to get her to have a go at feeding her while i go and sit elsewhere.
Otherwise not sure what else to do, apart from get DH to start lactating!! (if only!)
Sorry its such a long winded tale,its nice just to be able to talk about it.