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Why are my colleagues not speaking to me?-help pls!

2 replies

WhatthehellisplanB · 21/03/2019 13:52

Wow. Am just back from few days sickness. in the time I've been off, I've been demonised by my colleagues (and I thought friends) and slagged off.
This is because of an incident last week where I asked someone to do their job, they exploded at me and stormed off. There are undercurrents due to various issues, I think this person just lost it.
Found someone else to do that job, resolved it to the customers satisfaction.
Spoke to colleague who exploded-he apologised, I apologised. We hugged. Over and done with right?
Fast forward to today, I come back to the cold shoulder from my long-term friend and this other colleague.
Our boss wants to hear what happened-explained it. Boss suggests mediation. I explain I already apologised, as far as I was concerned, this is dealt with. I have no wish to rehash it and feed into the drama. Theres no need for drama. Its done.
Longterm friend and colleague is just in one of her moods, she refused to speak to me. (she was speaking to me fine up until Tuesday)
Well. Just how the fuck did this happen?
How is this all my fault? My other colleagues are lovely and speaking to me. Boss is a bit hmmm.
So, how do I resolve this? I'm being ignored by my friend and her pal, the exploding colleague. They've basically made me out to be a cunt when I'm not. There are undercurrents of anger, I seem to have been made the convenient scapegoat.
So as not to dripfeed, my longterm friend/colleague and I have just been promoted but nothings really changed. We're still doing our jobs!
I've never barked orders or done anything to deserve being treated like this.
Any thoughts?

OP posts:
redexpat · 21/03/2019 20:28

Your boss needs to step up and manage the colleague. Thats my thought. Also stop thinking of colleagues as friends, rather aquaintances. It means you invest less emotional energy in these relationships so if you havea disagreement at work it is much easier to deal with and not take it personally.

WhatthehellisplanB · 22/03/2019 00:33

Thanks for your thought. Unfortunately, I don't see my boss stepping up and managing the colleague because 'he's a good lad'.
This is why the situation occurred in the first place- this 'good lad' has been taking the piss.
As for my colleagues being my friends-don't worry thats a lesson learned! These people I've known for years, I've helped them out, listened to them, we socialise together. That is not a mistake I will ever make again. I'll be polite and do my job but thats it.
I was in tears today-boss went to get friend, she refused to talk to me because she's still upset about something that happened outside of work.
So upset she can't talk to me about it. Such a good friend eh?

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