Do you REALLY have friends at work?

[sl07]

Cut a long story short, I work in a office of few women and I thought that they were my friends.

Now the ladies in my office are starting to backstab and get me in trouble for minor mistakes (I am relatively new to the company) They only do this when the manager is in.

So Can you trust who you work with or do you just pretend to like them?

A few, yes - male and female. We go for lunches, nights out, support each other etc. I also get on really well with most of my colleagues (again, male and female).

I have a few close friends I met through work and work with still but we’ve known each other years, our spouses know each other, we meet outside work.
Otherwise there are colleagues and subordinates who I like and respect but don’t socialise with.

WheelyCoteClaus totally agree

I prefer not to mix business with pleasure. My friends and my social life are not connected to my work in any way

Where I work now I get on well with my colleagues but I’m unsure if I would keep in touch if I left. I would wish them well and be happy to see them for a chat but we’d drift apart.
I have made one friend for life through work- I worked for her for 14 years and she’s DS godmother. I left in 2016 but we still text and meet up.

They are good aquaintances but not friends. There is an unwritten rule in my country of residence that at work you should be personable but not private. So youre expected to be nice and friendly but not expected to incorporate them into your friendship circle.

15 years in an office, a lot of them older than me ( in their 60’s and some in their 70s) ok some are lovely but it’s dog eat dog! I hate it, constant squabbling usually about holidays but what really annoys me is the ones with grandchildren who use them as an excuse for having time off or feel more entitled to school holidays than the ones with dependent children! I actually do have 2 grandchildren and a 10 year old daughter and I find myself having to worry about childcare in school holidays because of this.. is this a selfish attitude? Should I have made a new post for this subject? Sorry, just joined today by the way! Hi guys

I've made one friend for life thru work-real, genuine, 100% friend. It's a friendship that has grown and grown. Although we don't work together now, I know we will always be in each other's lives.
Considering I've been working for over 25 years that's not a high friendship rate!

However, I am pleasant to workmates, have a laugh, buy biscuits and donuts for the office, but I do keep boundaries in place as I like to keep work and home separate, and I've seen so many 2 faced, back stabbing, gossipy colleagues that I'd rather stay away from.
I very rarely keep in touch in with ex-colleagues, unless it is for professional connections.