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Dilemma on return to work

10 replies

Mosschops30 · 24/08/2004 11:35

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Avalon · 24/08/2004 11:48

No, I don't think you're being selfish or unrealistic.

Is there a creche near to where you're studying?

I was in my first year at university when I had dd1 and fitted in my revision and exams around her. It can be done!

Mosschops30 · 24/08/2004 11:57

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Avalon · 24/08/2004 12:16

Some people probably will think that. Ignore them if you can. 12-15 hours a week is not very much time out of the whole week. Your MIL will probably relish the time with the baby.

I'd finished the actual classes when I had dd1 so could be at home with her. Every time she napped, I studied. Only the very basic housework got done!

ZolaPola · 24/08/2004 12:26

wouldn't think you were a terrible mother, but 1 week after would be v hard, IMO,hard on you especially! Could you have a plan B in case you feel it's too soon otherwise you might feel under horrible pressure. I retrained when ds was 5 mths - sometimes hard but good to feel my career was moving forward (and ignored any barbed comments about leaving my child). most colleges have good subsidised creches and they should also support you in starting a term later if necessary after having a child - is there a student support office or tutor you can talk too? all the best with it.

prufrock · 24/08/2004 12:34

If everything goes according to plan you should be fine - if you really enjoy what you are studying, and know that your baby is being well loked after then 12-15 hours shouldn't be an issue. BUT what will happen if the abby is late - or if you need a c-section, or just have a terrible birth? Would you still be allowed to start again in June if you cry off the January start at teh last minute? If so, I would plan to go back in January, but leave the actual decision until the day before and see how you feel.

Mosschops30 · 24/08/2004 12:56

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marialuisa · 24/08/2004 13:09

Just to say that i had DD in my final year. Don't know what course you're doing but how closely do they tab your attendance? I used to leave DD with DH whilst I went to tutorials but I didn't actually go to any lectures. Obviously didn't brag about that to my tutor or anything but i still got through just fine.

Mosschops30 · 24/08/2004 13:15

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miranda2 · 24/08/2004 13:30

I had ds in July and was meant to be off my course til Jan, but in fact went back in Sept. I'd rather the term had started sooner - i was bored out of my mind at home,and all my friends were away for the summer break! I should think you could do it if you want to - I took ds with me to about half the lectures (changed nappies on the floor etc!): I bought a dictaphone so i could be hands free holding him and hear the lecture, then write up notes afterwards. Also i could leave it on the desk if i had to take him out for some reason. I found a creche for a few hours a week (i joined the local gym so i could use theirs!), and some students minded ds for a couple of other hours so i could go to the library etc. If your mum is prepared to do these hours for you you'll be fine I should say. I expect you might miss a few hours of lectures in the first couple of weeks, but after that it should be OK. Kept me sane! And yes, a few people did think i was an evil mother, but just try not to let them get to you....I used to tell myself that they obviously weren't that bright if they didn't need the stimulation of studying as well as having a baby!!! (Very wrong of me i know, but it kept me going when a snide remark upset me). Most people will just be in awe of you .

Mosschops30 · 24/08/2004 13:40

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