23 weeks, showing and looking for work

[chloem93]

As the title says, I'm showing quite a lot now so I don't think I can just hide it or pretend I'm not pregnant in an interview. I've also been on an interview less than a month ago for a loss prevention job in retail, I disclosed I was pregnant in the interview and they didn't offer me the position (do have a feeling I would have been successful otherwise). I also popped into a agency for temp factory work, was finishing off filling in the forms when a woman in the agency came over to help me with the forms but also randomly asked 'Are you pregnant?' I felt on the spot and said that I was. Of course, after that they messed me about, kept changing the day I was suppose to be starting until I had enough and didn't bother with them. Maybe they thought it was a health and safety concern but just didn't want to say, who knows. The problem is, all of the jobs I've previously had and have experience in are physically demanding jobs such as warehouse/retail/cleaning/hospitality...work where speed walking for 9 hours and rushing up ladders is the norm & you have to carry things too heavy to lift because no one will help you. I was also about to get into security when I found out I was pregnant...I had passed the SIA course a few days after I had found out. Security is ok to do when pregnant if it's low risk but the easiest security work to get into is working on doors of clubs which I'm obviously not going to do when pregnant. Anyways, so far I've been applying for a mixture of part time, full time, temp and permanent but my massive issue with applying for permanent jobs is that I will obviously not stay there and by the time I'm trained, I'll be leaving which I can understand leaves the employer in a bit of a pickle. It's just not realistic, maybe if I was in a trained field but in retail and warehouse work, they usually aren't accommodating because it's not a specialised field... they can grab anyone off the street to do the work. I'd also admit now that the jobs I'm applying for are not my 'dream job', I'm literally only applying for them because I obviously need money. Of course you can't say this in an interview but it's also something that's known but doesn't have to be said because of the kind of job. I'd completely understand if the employer would prefer to employ someone who wants to stay long term and isn't leaving in 3-4 months time. Another issue I have is the physical elements of the jobs I'm applying for, let's just say I keep it to myself that I'm pregnant and somehow they don't notice, it would be risky health and safety wise. Some of these jobs I've had before expects you to not drink anything while working, work unattended lifting heavy things and these employers really don't care about the health of their staff. So in a way I feel like I have to tell them so they are aware and not treat me like a slave that can run around with 35kg on my waist or back.
Another problem are my inevitable maternity appointments and scans. Let's just say I didn't tell the employer, what would be my excuse for taking this time off? These entry level jobs where they can fire you at any time for the tiniest reason will fire me if I have one day off for illness, it's happened before. Unlike normal illness, I know the law protects me against pregnancy discrimination and I legally can have time off for my appointments but the employer would have to know what the appointments are about for that to apply right? I did have a work trial where I said in the interview that I have some appointments and they said 'we'll just need to see the letters for the appointments to confirm it.' If I wanted to keep it private that I was pregnant it would become impossible as the letters have maternity written all over them... this work trial was for a Christmas position by the way so they expected everyone to be available at that time, My due date is 15th of December...

I'm sorry for the long paragraph but I wanted to put as much detail in my thread as possible!

So back to the physical aspect. I'm also starting to feel the strains of pregnancy such as back ache and foot pain. I was standing in the kitchen for only 15 minutes last night and I found I had to sit down because I was in pain... I'm 25 and not completely out of shape, have a normal bmi, blood pressure ect so I know this is probably just my pregnancy. I also think I have flat feet as I did have the foot pain before I was pregnant, it's actually been an issue in my past jobs as I'd struggle with pain while standing for longer than 3 hours.
I do worry a little bit if I'm physically fit enough to do the jobs I'm applying for which also limited what I can apply for.
Before anyone says it, I know that I should just fight through the pain and get on with it. I know that money is more important and lots of women put up with pain everyday while pregnant and doing various jobs. I know it probably sounds like I'm morning and complaining... I know that it's my responsibility to find a job instead of relying on benefits.
That's why I'm stressing out so much about money... btw I'm going to be a single mum without any physical help from the father. Another reason why I'm not saying 'I'll be happy to take a few months of maternity and go to work' because I literally can't afford child care. The money I would make in a day would get eaten up instantly by a day of childcare which makes it kind of pointless... I know I can get financial help with child care once my child is 2-3 years old but I don't know before then, if anyone has any advice on this I'd be grateful. If I can't get any financial help before 2 years, I can't work until then which really annoys me tbh... I want to work but I can't afford the fees, it's a catch twenty two. I've also had a friend in the same dilemma.

So following my long rant which again I apologise for, I have numerous questions.

1. Should I apply for permanent jobs?
2. If I get asked that I'm pregnant, should I just lie and say I'm not?
3. How can I find an employer that's happy with impending maternity appointments but also ones that keep changing as the hospital cancel my appointments last minute (sometimes on the same day & send me another letter for another appointment)?
4. How can I afford to go back to work after I've had my baby? I don't think I could promise an employer to return to work in a short time frame because of child care fees.
5. What jobs should I apply for if I'm having back and feet problems? My job options are already limited.
6. If I face pregnancy discrimination, what can I actually do?

I also feel like my confidence has dropped since I've been pregnant when it comes to going to interviews and speaking with employers. I don't know if it's because I don't feel physically the same or because I can't promise them that I'm looking for a long career with them. My anxiety has increased massively.
Any advice on this?

Thanks in advance

I'm sorry I've no advice but hoping to bump this for you x

Ok, you need to tell your employer you are pregnant at around the 25-week mark and show them your MATB1 form.

1. - Yes apply for permanent no reason why not to
2. - No, don't lie as you would need to tell them very quickly anyway. Also if you are offered the job and then declined you would have the possibility to claim discrimination.
3. - You go with it and hope, as an employee it is your right to time off for appointments if you are entitled to Maternity leave
4. - Initially, most likely with working tax credits and child tax credits.
5. - Go for admin, you can type and there are often temp jobs around.
6. - Put everything in writing, log everything, print everything and speak to the CAB and ACAS and discuss your options, you need to prove you are being discriminated against because of a protected characteristic (pregnancy in your case)

For the anxiety speak to your GP and midwife and maybe look into mindfulness, but to be blunt timings are tight, you will most likely need to tell your employer immediately.

If I was you, I would be looking at an Admin role within a security company, it will keep your skills more relevant and may give you a foot in the door after baby is born.

Go through the entitled to website and see what you may be eligible for.

Good luck, it sounds like a tough path for you for a while

Also, you are going to need to look at the amount of Maternity Allowance you are eligible for as you won't be eligible for Statutory Maternity Pay

If you match the competencies for the role and come across well at interview, by rights you should be offered a job, but unfortunately not every employer is forward thinking, and especially in the case of small companies, they struggle with resourcing so will have concerns about employing someone in late stage pg because they would invest in training then the person goes on Mat Leave and they have to find a replacement.

With the above reality in mind, you'd be better off targetting your applications towards Medium to Large companies, if you want to secure employment in your current context, as they have infrastructure and processes in place to be able to recruit, support pg employees and fill temporary Mat gaps.

Reality is a small company is likely to be scared off at the moment, and could just engineer an excuse why not to employ you which is demoralising, but if you can target your best opportunities you're more likely to get perm work. Also, go for roles that are already low risk, eg admin, rather than higher risk roles where they have to risk assess you for their role. Again, it's about increases your chances of success.

Sorry to hear this OP. It shouldn't be this hard when you want to (and urgently need to) work.
Have you thought about working for yourself? Ironing, childcare, after school collection/care, evening babysitting, taxi driver/ dogwalking, pet-sitting. A part-time temp retail job on a till in the build up to Christmas. Doing a mixture of all of them.
As you say, definitely not your dream jobs, but they might get you through financialy for a couple of years until your child is in a free childcare place and you can get a job in security. Especially with tax credits.

They all require effort - putting ads in newsagent windows, on local FB pages, signing up to agencies, networking etc. You're currently sinking your effort into applications for permament full-time jobs. I'd switch now and build up plenty of customers before the baby arrives. Read up on tax/self-assessment and tax credits and keep documentation and all receipts.