There are a lot of threads lately about mums who are happy to give up work and stay at home. But

[toomuchtodo]

I did that too, for 8 years, working about 5 hours a week in retail just to get a break from the house.

BUT what I notice from a lot of posts is mums saying "I'll work again when the lo starts school"

I'm finding it harder/impossible to get a job that

a/ fits in around school times and 13 weeks holidays

b/pays enough to cover the cost of 2 ds's in childcare

so does anyone know the answer???!!!

I haven't a great career, I'm flexible eg. retail/childcare/cleaning etc.

I want to work when my ds's are in school and still be there for them but IT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!!

school based jobs are like GOLD DUST!!

and if I get a retail job I get £6 per hour and then pay out £6 for my ds's in childcare!

I don't want to work all weekend or evenings, I love seeing my family altogether!

I'm just wondering if all these mums who say "I'll work when the littlies start school" realise how hard it actually is to get working again after a break from it all!

PLEASE tell me any solutions/inspiring stories!!

I think the starting point is accepting that the perfect job - ie stimulating, excellent pay, fitting in completely with your children and no childcare costs - doesn't exist. It's a case of looking at your options and then making a compromise. I'm a teacher, which on the surface seems very child friendly, but I've never been able to drop off / pick up my own children from their schools, I've rarely been able to go to their sports days or other events plus I have 2/3 hours work to do in the evenings. The thing is, once you take the plunge, you'll realise the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. Have to say, I totally disagree with the post that said 'why bother with work if you don't need the money?' Work is about so much more than that: self esteem, having a stake in society and showing your own chidren that mothers don't have to spend their entire life staying at home after they've had kids.

good point ebeneezer

it is all about compromise I agree also about doing what you're happy with not doing what everyone else thinks you should do

Well I haven't read the whole thread but I have never understood the I'll work when they start school comment.

I currently work, first 3 days and now 4 days a week. Ds is 2.5 years old. My plan is to STOP working when he goes to school and use the time he is in school to register for a part-time re-training course.

I am aiming to take up to 5 at home rater than working for pay but those years will be ds's early school years rather than his infanthood. I will probably have to use after school care 2-3 times a week for most of the courses I'm looking at but in my current job I would have to use pre and after school care every day so it is about being there some of the time.

This is a very difficult problem though - especially if you have more than one child (which most people do)

Yes, agree with you Lazycow - I've never understood the 'I'll get a job once the kids are in school thing' - for several reasons. First, I don't believe there's some 'magic' age at which a parent should return to work. Secondly, as this thread shows, jobs which tick all the boxes of being able to drop off/pick up your kids, have all their school holidays off, pay well and be intellectually stimulating just don't exist! I went back to work when each of my children was around 6 months old. I'm a teacher, which, now they're all school age, has some advantages (ie getting most of their holidays off too) but also has disadvantages (couple of hours work most evenings plus never being able to do their school run). I think there's a danger in mothers hanging onto this idea that once the kids are in school they can slot into some perfect job. Don't mean to sound negative, because I truly love my job and I think the benefits to my children of seeing their mum and dad both having a life 'other' than being a parent are tremendous. I just think we need to be realistic - the most satisfying and stimulating jobs are unlikely to fit around the kids.