Paternity Leave - did your husband take it and what did he do with HIS "time off" ?

[Grrrr]

Following on from the "is maternity leave sexist" thread,

My dh took the 2 weeks paternity leave but subconsciously seemed to be under the impression that it was some sort of holiday time in celebration of him becoming a father (again).

He considered it to be his time and was irritated that he didn't get done what he had planned to do because I wanted him to come to the hospital each morning (was in 5 days after c-section) and look after baby whilst I showered etc. The second week he was still irritated that he couldn't go to IKEA for the day (it's over an hour a way and he wants to look at everything when we usually go) because I wanted a bit of help with stuff and there was ds1 to look after (he refused to take ds1 with him to IKEA).
He met friends for lunch at least twice that I know of and when really pressed he announced he had brought some work home with him that he needed to do before he went back to work.

Do I win for the least sympathetic/helpful use of paternity leave ?

Loving that acceptance speech saralou !

Anna888 - Why am I not really surprised that there are men out there who would use paternity leave to their own ends.

Grrr - no, not surprised either

My sister told me about it in the context of a more general conversation about men and what they do and don't do around the house. One of her BIL's is about to become a father, he is French (with French wife) but lives in Norway. Anyway, he is expected to take quite a big chunk of paternity leave. My sister's French PILs are absolutely horrified that he is going to do this...

Dd1 -Xh took a few days holiday and spent the whole time showing her off to visitors

dd2- he was off sick and spent the whole time pissed and managed to crash MY car

DH had 2 weeks off and did all the shopping, cooking, washing and cleaning.

One of my oldest, closest friends died 5 days before I gave birth. DH was fab, so understanding and supportive. We drove 100 miles with a 5 day old so that I could attend the funeral. He waited outside with LO while I attended service with my mam - it was too soon to start expressing and he wasn't in a routine yet. DH took him for a walk in sling and told him all about his "Aunty Lauren" (my friend).

I feel lucky to have him.

DH took it when DS1 was born - we were living with my parents at the time though so neither of us had to do much around the house.

Took is again with DS2 and helped with the 'childcare' side of things rather than the housework (the way I preferred it actually - I knew I'd have the next xxxxxxx months to spend all day with the DS's whereas he'd be back at work.

Not sure what he's going to do this time round

Dh took 2 weeks off. We were lucky to get full pay too.
I stayed in hospital for 3 nights and he visited each day. He did some shopping etc to get things for baby and bring clothes/nappies to hospital (emergency c section so wasn't very prepared!).
I did get jealous that he was having more sleep than me, but got my own back when we came home!

My husband took 2 weeks and spent the time tidying up, preparing food/drinks/snacks for me and the kids. Doing the school run, putting washing on and ironing etc. Generally seeing to the baby, pretty much everything so I could do as little as possible.

All I had to do was feed her and spend time with all of the children. Luckily he was off while I was ill with mastitis and then I just had to stay in bed while he looked after all of them and bought her in for feeding.

He is a star

Dh took 1 week paternity leave and two week holiday.

He did look after me and dd, but i was so glad when he went back to work , but this is more to with the fact i hate being fussed over.

Hr did do what was asked of him, but he also he did spend a lot of time doing what he wanted mind you from day dd slept for 4 hours between feeds.

And i have to do it all again in August.

dh was quite useful this time round and it was cool having him here for the first few weeks, esp for the boys, so it wasn't such a shock for them having a baby sister on the scene
what really pisses me off though is his attitude every time, that it is holiday (to be fair, he did have to take the second week as holiday) and he always thinks of it as 'mother leave' - as in he must run back to mummy and spend lots of time with her - wtf??!! eg this time round he left me and dd1 at home while I had mastitis while he took the boys in the car to his mothers 2 hours away leaving me suffering/getting taxis to out of hour gp at midnight etc etc