Influence over others..

[GaynorGoodwin]

Where to start...when I leave the office each night no-one says ‘night, see you tomorrow’ to me.......they instead seem to wait until our manager does. It’s a bit embarrassing being nearly out of the door before you even hear them. The Manager and I don’t particularly like one another but I feel I don’t show it and I’m wondering if she’s said something to them about me....she’s known to be two faced. I’ve never spoken about her to anyone (don’t trust them).
I’m left feelings no uncomfortable walking out to my car.
Any advice welcome, thanks

I'm not quite sure I'm getting it, to be honest.

Are there any other strange behaviours of your colleagues that make you feel you're being bullied? Or are you certain this is deliberate snubbing?

FWIW, my own boss usuallu doesn't even bother to check whether I'm still in half of the time. He just disappears. He also adores me (not romantically, of course, but he's on the record as being both exceedingly happy with my work performance and liking me on a personal level). Actually, nobody really wishes me a good night on a regular basis. And I'm the manager around here, so you'd think it was a perfect opportunity for brown nosing even if the other employees didn't personally care about my state of mind.

I have a distinct feeling there must be more to this story?

So just to get a clearer picture, when you go to leave at night, you say goodbye and people ignore you? Or do you wait to see if they say goodnight first?

It's a bit unrealistic to expect everyone to say goodnight isn't it? Where I work, people leave at different times and I wouldn't expect them each to say goodnight. Mind you, we do the horrendous hotdesking so my team are all over the place on different days. One day I sent an email to one of them, thinking I hadn't seen them so they must be down the other end of the office and realised they were in the desk behind me

Are there other aspects of the role that you dislike?

I probably sound ancient saying this but I just feel workplaces have become much more intolerable in the last ten years (at least in London). Im in my late 40s and have never seen such behaviour as I see now, bullying, loud and rude colleagues, issues like you describe being ignored, decimating gossip etc. I never experienced this to this degree in my earlier career. I think also if its quite endemic its a sign that you just dont fit with that workplace and its culture. I am senior in my role but have to endure new colleagues laughing, shouting and guffawing like fools all day doing virtually no work etc and you can not say anything or you are despised. Im planning to quit - just not worth it..

Do you say goodbye and they ignore you?

@polsha; that’s correct. It appears they only say goodnight to the others in their team. I’m in a team of two and their team has 11 others in. I feel embarrassed walking out especially if it’s say 3pm and no-one replies.