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Found out that a lady has been saying terrible things about me in the staff canteen

18 replies

isntitapity · 27/04/2018 12:27

There are lots of witnesses but it seams management wanted me just not to find out and keep it quiet... this 'lady' is quite high up.

I feel very upset but I'm currently at work and trying to keep a stiff upper lip!

The things she was saying were vile! I've done nothing wrong! Sad

What do I do? What can I do?
Please help.

OP posts:
MargoLovebutter · 27/04/2018 12:29

Who informed you of this isntitapity?

Are the terrible things that were allegedly said bringing your professional reputation into disrepute?

Who are the witnesses?

isntitapity · 27/04/2018 12:42

I've now had 4 separate people approach me and tell me from other departments who were in the canteen also.

Management are apparently aware but haven't mentioned anything to me.

I just want to go home.

The things that were being said aren't just the standard bitchy comments, apparently it was a full on personal attack on me. Name calling and saying how much she hates me and so on.

OP posts:
fcekinghell · 27/04/2018 12:51

You need to speak to your union if you have one and complain to HR

Frosty66612 · 27/04/2018 12:53

Complain to HR. Bullying in the workplace like that is absolutely vile

isntitapity · 27/04/2018 13:06

I sound stupid now, but is this classed as bullying if it wasn't directed at my face or would they just tell me to man up and get on with my job?

OP posts:
TheDinosaurRoars · 27/04/2018 13:08

It absolutely comes under bullying and hareassment in the workplace.

Are you a member of your union? I would be logging a formal grievance. It’s unacceptable behaviour.

Frosty66612 · 27/04/2018 13:08

100% classed as bullying (I used to work In HR)

isntitapity · 27/04/2018 13:22

The store I work in has a large HR department.

I just don't know what to do. This person was being nice as pie to me yesterday, she was saying all the things in the canteen last week apparently.

OP posts:
Ginorchoc · 27/04/2018 13:24

Can you ask her directly and let her know several people have come forward and you and they are unhappy and ask for an explanation.

Frosty66612 · 27/04/2018 13:26

Do you have a supervisor who can deal with it on your behalf?

isntitapity · 27/04/2018 14:02

I am a supervisor, so is she! Our next in line is the manager who knows about this but hasn't told me.

I have an hour left before I go home.

OP posts:
notapizzaeater · 27/04/2018 14:11

Speak to your manager and hr -she shouldn't be allowed to do this ..

MargoLovebutter · 27/04/2018 14:14

Please go to HR. Tell them what you have been told and by whom. Tell them how it makes you feel.

Ask HR to inform your line manager that you have been to see them and what you have seen them about.

Ask HR to inform you of what action they will be taking to help rectify the situation.

AmazingPostVoices · 27/04/2018 14:18

Manager and HR

fcekinghell · 27/04/2018 15:53

Go to your manager initially and name all the people who told you. This is important because whether or not they want to be involved, they now are whether they want to be or not. They are your witnesses and you must absolutely name them.

It's not too late to join s union and let your manager know you have.

isntitapity · 27/04/2018 17:29

I feel so embarrassed and low.

HR will be closed now but I will ring on Monday and ask for advice. I'm not in until later next week now. I don't know if I should ring my manager tomorrow. She will 100% back this girl.

OP posts:
daisychain01 · 28/04/2018 06:01

It absolutely comes under bullying and hareassment in the workplace

I know this isn't Pedants' Corner Smile but just to be clear, harassment is reserved solely for Protected Characteristics such as sex, race, disability. Unless the OP is in a PC category, the canteen incident is not harassment.

Bullying in the workplace is vile and destructive but it is not illegal. Harassment is illegal, because it in contravention of the Equality Act.

daisychain01 · 28/04/2018 06:09

The things that were being said aren't just the standard bitchy comments, apparently it was a full on personal attack on me. Name calling and saying how much she hates me and so on

Reported speech, rather than direct first hand experience. Is always a tricky one. If you've had 4 people independently approaching you, and reporting to you what they heard, then you need to write down what you remember they said.

On the other hand, if it's 'Chinese Whispers' and only one or two person actually reported the incident to you, with the other people hearing something from others and reporting that to you, then please be careful to capture the situation accurately.

I have no reason to disbelieve you when you say 4 people told you, but those investigating this situation may question I, and you need to be certain of the facts, as these things have a habit of spinning out of control and becoming "he said, she said".

You don't want them having an excuse to discredit your case or minimise the impact, as management often try to kick things into the long grass to deflect, given half the chance.

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