When did you feel ready to return to work after giving birth?

[speedymama]

Someone on another thread wanted advice from other mothers with large families who had gone back to work soon after giving birth.

It made me wonder about how soon individual women felt ready mentally, emotionally and physically to return to the work place themselves.

I personally was not ready until my DTS were 7 months old. Physically and mentally I was exhausted and emotionally, I did not feel ready to entrust their care to someone else.

Anybody else care to share?

TIA

it might depend too , on how many children you have - with my first, I wasn't ready at 6 months, but I did and it was full time
with second, I was ready at about that same age, but she was 9 m
with 3rd - I am ready now and would have been a few months ago. But not back until Sept when she'll be one.

I felt honestly and really ready only when my ds started school!

unfortunately had to go back when he was I think 8 months, though v part time (2 days) Hated it. Have found it such a struggle working when I wanted to be a FT SAHM. However two days is less than many have to do and I have been able to see that it's healthy for me and ds to have a break and for him to have other experiences with others; but I really never felt ready to go back.

1st - went back at 7m, was ready (desperate to get away!) earlier.
2nd - went back at 15mo, was definately NOT ready for it - but it's been alot better than I expected and 2mo down the line I'm glad I have gone back.

I was ready from when DD was about 5 months, but it took me a while to get organised and I went back when she was 6.5 months.

I imagine that with future children I might go back sooner, but who knows how I will feel at the time.

i've got to go back in 6 weeks , i don't feel ready at all and by that time i will have been off for 6 months. i'm only going back 2 days a week but i'm already having sleepless nights and worrying because dd will not take ebm! don't feel ready to hand her over to my, more than capable, mil

I've been off since the beginning of July last year. DS is now 9 months old and I am only starting to see that it would probably be good for me to have something else to think about. Plus am broke. I suppose it will be a bit exciting to go back to work but am not looking forward to having to deal with my boss and really not looking forward to putting DS into childcare. Still haven't looked into where to send him but am hoping to nly go back a couple of days a week initially.

Nothing's set in stone yet though!

With dd1 I had 6 months off and I definitely didn't feel ready to go back to work, my heart just wasn't in it and it took me a fair while to get back into the swing of things.

So when I got preg with dd2 I decided to take 9m off instead of 6 - and it was too long! I hadn't anticipated how tiring and tedious it was with 2 (just my opinion of my OWN situation, of course) and when I did go back to work I really enjoyed it and over the last year (I've been back 12m now) I really feel like I've got my mojo back. Incidently, I worked 3 days per week after having dd1 and have done 2 days since dd2 and am increasing to 3 days in a few months. But I really feel like I could have done 3 days since Christmas, but hadn't sorted childcare so couldn't increase my days.

What I'm trying to say is that it's a hard one to call: I felt very differently each time.

Went back after 3 months with ds1 - had to, as the pay stopped - but I was ready to go. With ds2 stayed off for 7 months and still wasn't ready to go back at that stage - funny how you feel different each time!

I did some freelance work when DS was about 15 months and enjoyed it, and I started to look for a permanent job just before he was 2.

I would definitely have found it a struggle to go back to work before he was 12 months old, on all counts.

in all honesty, I wasn't ready until ds was 2yrs old. I didn;t go back after maternity as my old eomployer couldn't offer me flexible hours but could offer me some free lance work, which I took, combined with other free lance work, to work part time every now and again. It took a long time for me to feel like I was willing for someone else (ie nursery) to look after him.

dd1 was 4 months old I think , it was when the money stopped but then I got PND and was off for another 2 months and then I changed my job 2 months later.

dd2 Was almost 6 months and that was a bit betteer but was in the middle of a messy break up so was a bit f*cked anyway.

Ds has just turned two and no way do I feel ready yet

Thanks ladies. This is so interesting to read because there are so many factors governing the decision of whether we return to work or not and if we do, when.

Someone said on the other thread that French women view British women as lazy because we took too much maternity leave. This small sample of responses just demonstrates the complexity of the reasons that dictate our decisions/choices but what none of us can ever predict is how it affects us emotionally.

The first year was a work write-off for me, although I actually did return to work when DS was 10 mths old....and promptly resigned 4 months later, as it was just not working out for me.

The first year of motherhood was a massive learning curve for me, not to mention the fact that I just wasn't physically very well - I had a c-section, had PND, DS didn't sleep well etc. Work was literally the very last thing on my mind. I have friends who have bounced back into full time work 4 months after giving birth and have been absolutely fine, though, so it does seem to vary drastically...

2 weeks for the first. It was fine. I was fit. Pregnancy isn't an illness for most of us luckily. Sitting at a desk is easier than minding a child and also long gaps can mean you forget your job and important developments too so not good for the brain!

I wanted to go back to work again straight away, anything other than look after that squirming pink thing.

Finished work at lunchtime on a Friday, had DS the same night at midnight. Came home from hospital on Monday and went back to work the following wednesday.

Yes well I went into labour whilst at work, gave birth in the loos, gave it a bottle, phoned my boyfriend to pick it up and went back to my desk.

Beat that!

It was me that asked ! I felt ready from about 2/3 weeks but didn't have the ' guts ' to do it...usually take 8-12 weeks but have been encouraged by other mums on mn to have ago at going back when I am ready this time...due in october !

I win!

I thought it was illegal to work for the first 2 weeks after giving birth?

with DS1 I had a year off but was 'ready' to go back after 9 months with DS2 I go back in 3 weeks & he'll be 9 months and I don't think I'll ever be ready.

I can't imagine anyone being 'ready' to go back to work after 2 weeks and unless it was a matter of absolute financial necessity, what on earth would possess someone to go back to work so soon???