Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Work

Chat with other users about all things related to working life on our Work forum.

Back in the office and struggling

2 replies

birdiebirdiewoofwoof · 21/01/2018 17:10

I freelanced part time for several years after my older son was born. Fantastic for flexibility and I loved the work, but it was also isolating and fairly unpredictable, and I was starting to worry that it looked a bit nebulous on a CV. So I was keeping half an eye out for an office job. An ad came up that sounded great so I applied to see how it went. They liked me and I started Mon-Thurs as soon as I'd sorted out childcare. The pay only really covers childcare and travel, but I thought it was worth it for other factors.

The work is fine, my colleagues are lovely and there are some great aspects to it, but overall I'm struggling. I'm nearing the end of the six month probation and the commute is killing me - over two hours on the train each way, not because it's all that far but because there's a stupidly long wait between connecting trains. I thought I would start driving lessons alongside working and eventually be able to commute by car, which would shorten the commute massively. But it's becoming clear that I don't have the time or energy to fit in a driving lesson after 12+ hours out of the house.

The toddler is a terrible sleeper, DH and I get no evenings to ourselves without him buggering about and then he's up in the night as well. I'm so tired. I have a long-standing anxiety disorder that I thought was well under control, but the more tired I get, the worse that gets as well. I've had panic attacks every day for over a week, which I can cope with in the very short term as I'm used to them, but this clearly isn't sustainable. I was trying to make a sandwich earlier and couldn't spread butter as my hand was shaking. Over an entry-level job for fuck's sake!

I wanted to stay for a couple of years minimum, and maybe even go to 5 days when DS2 starts school. Now I'm trying to figure out the minimum length of time I'd want in order to put it on my CV, and doubting whether I can even last that long.

WWYD? How long would you try to stick it out? If I'm honest I'd love to just stop, and I know DS1 would like to have me around more. But would that be an awful waste of the opportunity? Or am I getting tunnel vision and thinking this is the one and only job I'll ever get?

OP posts:
user1497997754 · 21/01/2018 17:52

If this job is affecting your health stop. If financially you don't have to do it then don't much better that you go back to how it was before you started it. Take your time to find something more suitable fir you and your family. I am in a similar situation to you and to try and do a job that stresses you out is no good for anyone. Explore other options what about working a few evenings a week and something closer to home. Your health and wellbeing is the most important thing so look after it....a job more suitable will come along just keep looking

SecondShifter · 23/01/2018 12:10

If the pay only covers childcare and travel and you are exhausted and stressed out then it doesn't sound like it's worth it. If you can afford to stay home and look for something that's more suitable (less hours, short commute, etc.) then I would do that and leave after the 6 months.

Personally I only think it's worth working when you're a mum of small children if a) you have to so you aren't homeless (my case, I'm a single mum) or going to seriouslly stuggle to pay the bills, or b) it results in an overall improvement in the quality of life of your family (in terms of happiness, stress levels, absence of exhustion, etc.)

Are you happier than when you started the job? Do you think overall your family is happier?

New posts on this thread. Refresh page