I need time off for a funeral but work wont give it to me?

[hll0914]

Both my grandparents died within a week of eachother and whilst work were more than happy to allow me to have my Grandfathers funeral off work they don't want to let me have my Grandmothers funeral off?
The employee handbook states "Extended family, one day off paid for the funeral (which can be increased to up to one week with manager discretion)." and the handbook defines "Extended Family" as "Grandparent, in-laws, aunts, uncles, cousins, close
friends". My work place is claiming that because my Grandmother & Grandfather weren't married my Grandmother "isn't my real grandmother therefore I don't need to go to the funeral" actual quote there
The trouble is, she isn't actually my blood grandmother, my blood grandmother died several years ago and this lady was my grandfathers new partner, who I treated like a grandmother.

I'm not a member of the union, what can I do? The funeral is in 3 days and so far I don't have permission to go!

Is the funeral on your contracted day?

If not can you email and say "due to personal circumstances I am unable to take any optional overtime next week. I can confirm I will of course work my.contracted 11.5 hours on my contracted days".

Presumably this is where the line is drawn to stop people attending unlimited “grandparents” funerals. If all 4 grandparents are divorced with new partners, that’s 8 potential funerals. If they all have more than one partner like yours, o/p, you could be up to 16. Then you get the piss takers who will claim their grandads mates brother as “like a grandparent” and it gets ridiculous.

Presumably you’ve already had two paid days for both grandparents? Take it a/l, or try under “close friends”.

I had this situation and I just told them whether they authorised the unpaid leave or not I wouldn't be in work that day so they had a choice of either ticking a box on a system or dealing with the paperwork or a disciplinary. They authorised it about an hour later.
I was very very ballsy in my youth though so I'm not sure I'd recommend doing that now.

If your contract says six weeks then six weeks it is - you'll need to appeal to the least dick-ish of the higher ups I'm afraid. Check your contract though - normally you only have to give a day or two's notice for one day off.

I approve hols at my place of work and I've never turned down a funeral; even if at very short notice. We just make it work though I understand that some places may not be able to.