Feeling like the country forces single parents in to debt/poverty

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I'm a single mum currently on maternity currently looking at returning back to my job after 8 months maternity leave. I was looking forward to it but I now I feel overwhelmingly stressed.
I earn more than minimum wage but not enough to break even after child care costs if I go back full time , and won't get tax credits towards childcare if I do as I'll earn pass the threshold yet if I go back part time and get tax credits for child care then I still won't take home enough to cover life. I feel I'm stuck taking home near a grand after costs however when mortgage/rent is 800 I'm struggling to find a solution to make this work.
I don't have any family to look after my son, has anyone else be faced with this situation?

Sorry also meant to add, the other thing the government MUST do is force absent parents to pay towards their child upbringing. The police should be able to arrest for non payment.

@ttbb I would say that I've worked enough to pay for someone else's but frankly that's not the point.
My point is that the economy of the country means it's near impossible to support yourself and a child because of the high child care costs and wages.
But excuse me for thinking I wish the way our country worked we can support and sustain our family purely off our own backs if you're willing to work for it ? ...

I am lucky now as after the first five months I had a break through and now I receive child support, however again this would go on costs of actually being able to work! Childcare here is £60 a day ...
unfortunately not really any room for a lodger even if I did put my son in my room I'm not sure many people would want to live with a baby - or if I would even trust them. And I'm sure this would effect tax credits unless I was being slightly underhand

When you say

Not sure how they work this out

You should have a letter setting out how they work it out

If you don't understand the letter then take all your wage slips that cover this period and photograph them and email them to district council and tell them you don't agree.

Sometimes... if your work payroll haven't done things correctly with Tax office, (and it does happen) it will have an impact on tax credits and HB as these offices will be informed by tax office who in turn have been told stuff slightly

Providing your wage slips proves beyond doubt what you earned and it has to be looked atincorrectly

Having a lodger under the rent a room scheme didn't used to effect tax credits as it's tax free money and therefore didn't count. Email and ask the question?

Money in isa didn't count either as tax free interest

ttb really what an odd goadery fuckery thing to say! As pp has said she is on mat leave!

OP i could have written this post myself. Its an awful situation to be in, i hate relying on help, especially when it changes so often. I was married and used to work full time and had full time childcare etc. Now I am in a HA house, in debt and id give anything to work full time and have a better life for us but I cant afford childcare, id be more out of pocket than i am now, and i have no family at all who can help.

These last school holidays have pushed me into even further debt, i took as much leave as i could and then had to put my son into holiday club. I also earn above the minimum wage. Id give anything for affordable childcare and to be able to have the security if making my own money.

Its no way to live, its certainly not what i imagined would happen when i got pregnant (i had my own mortgaged house too at the time but divorce took that, long story) but at the same time i cant complain as i am getting help and we have a roof over our heads.

To the did you not think about this when you got pregnant type comments - my life was entirely different when i got pregnant. I was married and had family. Now i am divorced and the family help (not that i ever used that help as i had childcare) are now pushing up daisies. What i have learnt from it all is to expect the unexpected in life lol. Sometimes it throws shit at you that you couldnt even make up.

OP hope you get into a better place soon, in the meantime i'm right here with you - googling au-pairs and nurseries, getting the prices, worming out a budget, realising all of it would leave you in the minus every month... its a vicious circle that wont stop until childcare is made affordable or you land a lucky work from home job, something i havent come across... yet.

working not worming

You said you were close to promotion when you started maternity leave.

That's important, and to me is the tipping factor for this decision. You need to go back full time and get that promotion. The only solution that is really going to make a long term difference if to earn more. It would sound a bit like Xenia to say that in isolation, but now you have said this is very much on the cards for you I think it's definitively the right thing.

That leaves you, possibly, with a time when you just about break even. If you are going to be facing a short-term shortfall, how much per month is it?

Good luck with this OP and don't take any notice of judgement

Walk a mile in my shoes
Often comes to mind when people judge and usually those very same people have a melt down in the first five yards if something turns there life upside down

Are you absolutely sure you are not entitled to tax credit help with childcare as the threshold are pretty high ? or does your employer participate in the childcare voucher scheme ( not sure if that is being phased out). This can save you 20% of childcare costs. At age 3 kids now get 30hours free childcare. I know that is a way off for you but knowing that the very difficult / expensive years are short lived can help. Go through CMS to make sure your child's dad takes responsibility. As others have said the government need to do more to make abscent dads pay. many lone parents do work and make it pay.

There are some depressingly ignorant and judgmental posters on this thread.

When I got pregnant I had a great career and was happily married to a man who earned a six figure salary - we'd been together 7 years, married for 5. I could not have predicted he'd have an affair and leave the family - he was about the last person I thought capable of that.

Thankfully I had a great lawyer, got a good settlement and xh pays generous, consistent maintenance. I've also got wealthy and generous parents and a flexible employer who have supported me to keep progressing my career.

I have been very very fortunate not to have had to struggle financially and things could have easily been extremely different. It's hard enough bringing dcs up alone. I have no family help day to day. Having crippling financial pressure on top it must be incredibly tough.

I don't know what the answer is, other than things definitely get easier as they get older and more independent. The costs of early years childcare on just one low income are prohibitive for too many. I definitely think there should be more support available to enable lone parents back into work.

Are you sure you won't get tax credits? We do on 55k?

Haha.. Really??

It isn't easy but I would really try to get the father involved and if not him his parents. There are 4 grandparents here and the father and perhaps even his siblings. Surely between all those adults the care of this child and its costs and be borne.

It is worth the investment in your career. We paid 50% of each of our net salaries on child care at the start but by preserving two full time careers, pursuing promotions and other work most other people did not push for it did pay off over time and now the youngest are teenagers it's not too bad (I am a single parent now but always worked full time).