Three weeks in and feeling shit

[achangeisgonnacome]

I'm three weeks into a civil service role and hate it.

Being 'brand new' to the civil service I am supposed to have these induction sessions but haven't had these yet.

The first week I was sat at a desk and sent loads of papers to read. Weeks two and three I was asked to develop business cases and prepare a submission, but the thing is I have no idea of how to even do that. It's not something I've ever done before and when I mentioned maybe going on appropriate courses to help me, it was dismissed as not necessary!

My manager is so busy and always away at meetings and there isn't anyone else on the same team (although the department itself is quite big).

I have tried talking /emailing to ask for guidance, but get one word responses back.

My confidence has taken such a pounding and I am getting that tearful panicky feeling each day as feel such a fraud , sat there not really knowing how to do these tasks. My previous role I was so capable and yet here I am a complete numpty.

To compound all this I have not been set up on their HR system, so unlikely I'll be paid at the end of the month.

Any suggestions of how I should approach all this with my manager? I've asked for a meeting next week which I hope I can get through without getting emotional.

Hi achange what does your job description say? Is anything you're being asked to do bear any resemblance to your main responsibilities of the role you've been recruited for?

That would have to be your opening gambit with your manager - how can they ask you to do things like business cases if it isn't on your JD and they won't give you training.

Can you ask for copies of recent business cases for other projects (even if from different departments) to familiarise yourself with the usual format and language?

They have recruited you as a competent person who will be brilliant once you find your feet. They have not made a mistake here. You will be fine. The secret is that everyone is a bit out of their depth and doing the best they can. You aren't a fraud you are normal.

Don't worry about the payroll thing - if you aren't on the system on the day the automatic payments go through they will raise a cheque.

Although those tasks are not actually specified on the JD, it states that it'd be advantageous to have experience in xx areas and then on to say as long as you can grasp information quickly etc etc. So I must be completely stupid as I'm so not grasping anything! It's like I'm blind to it all.

My email about discussing issues has not been acknowledged and now I'm feeling awkward about going into work. (Guess it could be that he hasn't read it yet of course)

I know I have to put my big girl pants on and just get on with it, but ATM I can't see my way through.

I think you need to get a bit angry and demanding- in a nice and professional way! The problem is them, not you. They employed you and then completely ignored you. That is outrageous. The first thing I'd do is communicate with HR to ensure I was set up on the system. This is your first priority. Can you send your manager a meeting request? The same for any other colleagues who might be of any use? Do not lose confidence. Remember it's them not you.

I am getting angry now as this is a joke. Today I asked to speak with my manager about the situation. He agreed via a one word email response.

I came back after a day off to more emails asking me to prep stuff on top of the other things I am expected to do but without any clue of where I'm expected to get the info from. I'm all for taking initiative and working independently but I don't even know the contacts who maybe able to help.
This is not how I saw the civil service as an employer- all the stuff I've read suggests they support and mentor new staff along the way.

Oh and HR are passing me (and to be fair, manager too) from pillar to post, so that issue remains unresolved.

It may be that in six months time I'll look back and laugh, but ATM it's getting to the point where I'd like to quit, but in reality of course I cannot do that.

Hun I feel for you
I felt exactly the same a year ago and one year on a lady in my team
Is being so awful it's made me depressed

Long and short of it
I've been looking for a new job and just want out!

Please don't do a me and leave it a year and get ill and down

Trust your gut
Sounds like you've done all the right things and your not stupid at all
Sounds like no proper training or prospects just like where I am !!!!

Keep all emails in a folder labelled New Starter or something. There will be a new starter process. What is actually outstanding HR wise? Is it in the same building? I would send my manager a meeting request, if no response I'd schedule their manager a meeting. Keep everything.

Ok so shoot me now as i wimped out. So have no one to blame but myself.

We get to appointed time and I ask if manager is ready to have a chat. Not really says he, and asks if we can do meeting tomorrow instead?

Oh ok I'lll book it in the diary says me.... Why didn't I say, 'no actually it's not ok we need this sorted now' ?

You can say, well I'm new here and need some guidance, who do you suggest I meet with in your absence? Type thing...

@achangeisgonnacome I have PM'd you

Thanks Shakey for PMs.

Disheartened to know you experienced similar (if not worse) with the same organisation

Yes there's a new starter checklist that's not been completed.

Tonight I've written down all the issues I want to raise. That way I can tick them one by one- it's quite a long list ...

Finally had the chat and was as upfront and honest as I felt I could be.

Was acknowledged that there hadnt been as much support as could have been( but was reassured that the (super tiny) contributions I have made so far have been worthwhile.

True or not, I'm taking it

I now have an idea of how to approach some of the objectives set for me, and the timescale that these need to be achieved by.

I'm not completely convinced with the, 'you can always ask me for help' statement as these past four weeks this has so not been the case, but am willing to give it time.

And am emergency salary payment is coming my way as HR still not sorted their shit out.

Thanks to those who gave me advice.

Sorry this is long and I'm not actually sure what I'm asking, if anything.

Three weeks further on from
my OP and nothing has changed.

My manager is now on leave for a month and only gave me the sketchiest idea of what he expects upon his return. Even if I knew what to do, Individually each piece of work would take weeks. So the amount he has asked me to deal with is completely unrealistic. I'm also on leave for ten days during the time he's off. So really I have two weeks!

I had a meeting with the next manager up, to go over what was outstanding and I'm ashamed to say I burst into tears. He was more understanding than my own manager and has agreed that I've been tasked with too much. He reassured me that everyone feels like I do when they first come to the team...

Maybe this job is not for me. In fact I think I knew it before I accepted the job. I squashed my gut instinct and ignored my doubts due to the salary increase and because a flexible working arrangement was agreed.

I'm so tempted to hand my notice in but we cannot realistically afford (who can?) the drop in salary - esp as DD is about to go off to uni.

Should I stick it out as it's bound to get better or admit I'm not suited to this type of role and look for something else?

Did the next manager give you any sort of direction with regards to what you need to achieve over the next few weeks? If so, I would do my best to crack on and keep asking for help. In the meantime, I would start looking for something else. I very much doubt this will improve.

usee149...* no not really, although gave me names of people to contact.

He acknowledged that my LM hasn't done all the new starter stuff that maybe he should have.

I'm going to have to stick it out but will apply for stuff in the meantime.

I've taken a while to settle into other jobs but none have been like this. It's impacting on my home life too which is very sad as am getting married in just over a fortnight and I'm not enjoying the build up at all as am preoccupied with coping at work.

Make it your priority to look for something else. You want to do a good job, you have given it a good go, do the bare minimum and concentrate your efforts on getting out. Congratulations on getting married. That is your life. The job, pah! You are just passing through.

Sorry to hear it hasn't improved
Gentle reminder to keep up the paper trail, even from what was discussed with the higher manager. Along the lines of "Thanks for taking the time etc and to highlight that the induction/training has been unsatisfactory blah blah"