This is whizzing around my head, so need to set it out and perhaps get some impartial advice.
I've been employed by a charity for 8 years, had many ups and downs in that time. It's a job I took on because I really care about the cause but the prospects for career development are very poor and the organisation isn't always the best at looking after its staff. There can be a lot of pressure and not much support, and I've had bouts of anxiety and depression while working there.
I've toyed with leaving many times, but jobs doing what I do are non-existent in this part of the world. And, having been very seriously broke a few years ago, the thought of relinquishing any degree of financial security scares the life out of me.
However I now have a child, am currently on mat leave. And I don't want to go back. DH is fully supportive of whatever I decide although, if pressed, he will say he thinks I should give something else a whirl for the sake of my happiness. I could try some freelancing at what I do, and also have a couple of hobbies that could be turned over to making money. One of them is something I'd really like to be getting paid for, it's something I'm good at although I would need to seek accreditation to really make headway.
I am so torn. A huge part of me is yelling at myself to go for it now, while I can. But another part is terrified that if I walk away from my job I'll never find another and will end up stony broke again.
We could manage on DHs salary alone, although it would mean being frugal. We aren't big spenders really. But we haven't really had to economise much in recent years.
I'm not sure if I'm more scared of leaving that job, or of being trapped in it forever...!