Cant do it! I am weak! Advice needed on mothers helps please!

[charlieplus3]

Hiya all.

Started back at work this morning and children were left with DP which was fab as i was totally relaxed and got lots done, but i know i wont feel the same with leaving them with a nanny in September (before i get a kicking, i am not a snob,this is actually a cheaper option for me than a nursery as i have two babies more or less)As some of you will know from other threads on this subject i have never left my DD not even with family or friends. We both have seperation anxiaety.

Anyway luckily for me we can mess about with Dp shifts so i get 1 and a half days in the office with him minding the kids and the rest i will do from home. But this is a full time job so will need a mothers help. SO

How do i go about finding one
How much do i pay and what about tax etcDo they do housework aswell
Should they have any childcare qualifications
What questions should i ask at thier interview

Thankyou Charlie hopless case of a mother

The reason i dont need anyone till september is my teenage daughter is going to work for me after her exams

I used to be a nanny (qualified) and wouldn't dream of thinking you're a snob. Nurseries and childminders are v costly if you have more than one child.
If you hire a nanny, it will cost you more than a Mother's Help. MH's don't need to be quailfied and should do housework. They're also not usually meant to have large amounts of sole charge time with the children, so this might work for you if you can work largely from home. Most nannies will take on nursery duties only - ie mainly keeping the children busy, providing a wide variety of things for them to do both at home and out on trips etc, cooking for them and keeping their rooms clean etc.
If you only work PT and therefore only want PT help, then your nanny/ME is likely to be working for other people too. In this instance, she can be self-employed and look after her own tax/NI. If you are the sole employer, then it will be your responsibility to pay her tax/NI contributions.
Am now the proud Mum to three wonderful children of my own and am still in regular contact with the perfectly normal and not in the least bit snobby family, whose kids I used to be in sole charge of. Hope this is helpful and good luck.

Has anyone got a mothershelp and work from home pleaseeeeeeeeee

Thankyou aero feel better now. Its so difficult trying to decide what to do for the best. I wont be leaving the children in her sole charge for a long time when im sure a good relationship has formed with us all.

Sorry, missed the bit about interview questions. Ask about their methods of discipline. What will they do in case of an emergency. Do they know first aid?
What sort of things they will be expecting to do with the children?
What is their past experience?
Why did they leave their last job? etc, etc
I'm sure I'll think of more.
Discuss money
Check all references. If you can, speak to past employers.

Hi Charlieplus 3 and Aero,

I've had two nannies so far (one resigned) and I'm not a snob: same cost as 2 nursery places. A few thoughts: If you are looking for part-time nannies are no longer allowed to be self-employed: it was effectively a tax loophole that was closed about a year ago (but I'm not sure about this new system of registered childminders working in your home...) Tax and NI is an enormous cost and you really need to work out the total cost to you before you make any net-pay promises. I pay my nanny 195 net a week for 3 days and the tax bill is in the region of £60 a week. I use a pay-roll company called Nanny tax: if you look up their website I think they have tables on it that work out net and gross costs (which would be the same, obviously for a nanny or mother's help). The other thing to watch out for if you are looking for part-time is if they work for somone else you can get screwed on the tax code: you need to make sure the nanny allocates her tax free allowance to you (assuming you're the main employer) or the tax bill will be even higher.

Re do they do housework: for a mh that's quite standard if they're not sole charge of the kids but even if you're at home, if you're hidden away in a study all day you might be pushing it to expect housework as well as childcare: but the key thing is that while there are some rough understandings every job is different and as an employer it's up to you really to say at interview what you want: it's a good idea to do a job description and when it comes to it it's a VERY good idea to draw up a contract with very precise details about what the job entails.

Re finding one: If you're in London I'd really recommend Simply Childcare magazine. (search on google and you'll easily get the website). The people who run it are great and will explain lots of things to you if you call them.

Questions: get a full employment history and question any gaps; then just ask about everything that you think is important about bringing up your kids: diet; discipline; activities; juggling things for diff ages; and - in your case - how they would handle loking after the kids while you're at home working.

Follow up references and be precise in your questions: the most important thing to ask (I now learned) is would they employ them again? If you detect a hesitation then you need to find out why.

Good luck

Thanx hatter thats great advice

Been in touch with agencys and they pay the tax for them whuch is good.

Thanks for that Hatter - I had no idea things had changed re tax.
Totally agree about the contract and making crystal clear what you want.
I hope you find the person you're looking for and all works out well.