where to learn how to 'manage'

[sugarfreepolo]

it's so hard, i have the degree, the knowledge and years of experience of how not to do it but it's so hard to learn how to keep every one happy and make money

and also to get people to listen and do what you want without being an a hole

Not everyone is cut out to or wants to manage other people. Perhaps you are one of them?

well that's a bit defeatest! I was hoping for some good website/book recommendations!

There are many courses that will help. OU course B716?

Do you have a manager in you company who will take on the role of mentor for you. Someone you admire their people management skills and you can be completely open and honest with?

The blog askamanager is very good - it's Q&A but she's been doing it for years, and has a great, no-nonsense philosophy. Most of it boils down to having the tough conversations and not shying away from them - I'm working on that..

There's the Institute of Leadership and Management www.i-l-m.com/

It kind of depends on the context / type of profession though - finding someone who's style you rate, and persuading them to mentor you, is probably the quickest way to get practical tips to build your confidence (as Weallhavewings said more succinctly )

You won't keep everyone happy if you're a manager. A lot of people who make it to the top of the tree don't care very much about how their staff 'feel'. They're interested in the bottom line (in business anyway). That's why I say not everyone is cut out to manage even if they do have years of experience.

The one minute manager is good

Credibility by Kouzes and Posner

It isn't about "making everyone happy", but engaged people who like working for you are more productive, and that generally goes a long way to the "making money" bit.

I would say the key things people need to be engaged are:
Clarity and direction - do people know what you want them to do, and how it fits in with the objectives of the business over all

Listening - do people have the chance to voice their opinion, get questions answered and contribute their ideas and insights?

Fairness - do you treat people fairly? Not necessarily give them everything they ask for, but be equitable and explain honestly why you can't or won't do the things they want that you're not going to do. Do you fight for your team? Coupled with this is having honest conversations and taking tough decisions - people are watching to see what you do with those not contributing.

Recognition - do you "catch people doing things right"? Are they seen, appreciated and made to feel valued?

Competence and planning - do you know what you're doing in your job? Do you plan work effectively, or are you always creating short deadlines and pressure due to your lack of planning?

Fun - most people want to do a good job and enjoy what they do. It isn't about "zany" office games, but is yours a fun team to work in? Do people look forward to coming in?

Hope some of that is helpful