Work being Understanding

[Bumblelion]

I am a single mother to 3 children (aged 11, 7 and 2). Youngest has global developmental delay and has portage every other Monday (when I work at home), SALT every 4 weeks on a Monday, development checks (about every 3 months or so on Wednedays - a day when I work in the office but I end up working from home that day as my appointments are always late morning/early afternoon), eye hospital appointments (about every 3/4 months on a Thursday).

My youngest goes to a nursery 2 days a week (and to my ex-SIL on Thursday).

She has been going to nursery since October when my mum (who used to look after her) had a breakdown (she is stil unwell). The nursery is brilliant for her and lots of professionals (SALT, portage, daycare co-ordinator) have also visited my DD at nursery and told me how good they are with her, and how much they are doing to bring her on.

My biggest problem is that my DD suffers continously from one thing or another (conjunctivitis, styes that turn into cysts, just being poorly). Since she has been at nursery, there have been about 6 or 8 occasions when I have been called home from work as she has been so poorly (but been okay in the morning when I have dropped her off). The last time was last week, when I picked her up they said she had been a "bit quiet" (not that she speaks) and I said that the Monday had been a busy day as she had portage/SALT (both on the same day) and had a late sleep (still likes her morning nap).

That evening she was fine, but she woke up at 2:30 am and didn't go back to sleep until 5:30 (and she is a child who loves her cot and has no trouble in going to bed) - she had a raging temperature that Calpol, tepid flannels couldn't bring down.

She obviously couldn't go to nursery on Wednesday - took her to doctors - got a "virus" and is on 5 (yes, 5) lots of medicine - Amoxycillin for the "virus", lactulose (for her constipation), Calpol (for her temperature), Salbutamol (medicine form of ventolin) for her breathing at night-time and a decongestant (can't remember name - Trimapin or something) for her blocked ears - keeps failing hearing tests.

My work know of her "problems" (if you can call it that and are very understanding) but I was wondering whether they could "lay me off" because of the amount of time I have to have off because she is poorly.

She gets DLA and is under a lot of specialists but can my work penalise me for having a child that has so many problems.

It doesn't stop me doing my work as I have network links at home and, if I can't be in the office, I do make the time up at home - working nights when the kids are in bed and even at weekends when ex. has the children.

But, can my work "sack me" for not being able to do my job to the best of my ability (because of having a child with so many problems).

Nothing has been mentioned but I do feel guilty at the amount of time I have off and I just wondered where I stood if anything was ever mentioned.

Anyone know?

Sorry, no advice really to give, just well done work for being so understanding, I would call them and let them know how you are feeling, and take it from there..

Even if your not working in the office you seem to be doing the work at home, so its not like your just not doing it at all. I don't think they could sack you because of that. And by the sounds of them they seem really supportive. I'd try not to worry you're doing your best and as a single mum too, you're an insperation to everyone!

Thanks for your kind comments - I just think where would I be if something happened to my job - only ever had one job - been here since I was 17 and I am the only secretary that works from home. I suppose, going in my favour, is that because I can (and do) work from home, I am given lots of personal and confidential work to do for the PLC group (top body) and perhaps that works in my favour.

I've no expert knowledge, but I think that if they suddenly sacked you you'd have a case against them - I think they'd have to tell you they weren't happy, and go through a procedure of verbal then written warnings, so you'd have plenty of notice and the opportunity to discuss things with them.

Bumblelion, you have been having a hard time...haven't seen you around for quite a time and now it's obvious why. Really sorry to hear about dd2's ongoing developmental problems and your mum's breakdown.
I'm no expert either but I'd have thought "custom and habit" (is that the term?) plays a part here. You have been attending these appointments for some time now I guess and no-one has objected. If work are fully in the picture, you are making up the time, then I don't think they would have much of a case for suddenly deciding it's not acceptable, having accommodated it until now.
I'd say it's more likely that they understand that these difficulties are outside your control, and are keen to retain a trustworthy and long-serving member of staff.
You really need sis, or Meanmum, or one of our other HR specialists!

Thanks - I think I am jumping ahead of myself here but sometimes I lay awake in bed at night, feeling guilty about "letting work down" and wondering how on earth I would manage if worst came to worst. But saying that, I prepare lots of documents for our personnel manager and I am sure that if a problem existed as far as the company was concerned, surely they would let me know.

I just take each day as it comes - I never know from one day to the next if my DD (or any of the other 2) are going to be poorly.