Goback to work Thursday - AAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

[mummyemmy]

I have been off for 6 months and am going back to work this Thursday - absolutely dreading it!

I'm sick of people saying are you going back part-time, why don't you stay at home?? Blah blah blah! The truth of the matter is we cannot afford for me to part-time (my work would say no anyway I'm sure) I am the main breadwinner. We've looked at my husband giving up but don't know if it's feasible.

I bring in £1200 a month, he brings in £1100 a month bills are £1600 a month and childcare is £420 a month.

Part of me wants to go back to work for some adult conversation and gossip etc.. but now my baby is doing lots of things I want to be with her so much!!!!

Does anyone have any sggestions???

No suggestions but {{{{{hugs}}}}} - I am returning to work in 3 weeks and really not looking forward to it so I will be thinking of you on Thursday.

hi ceebeeb! i ahd i feeing i might find you on this thread!

i am back at work next monday, i too am dreading it! i have had almost 6 months off too. I have so far tried not to think about going back because i get upset (really upset if i'm tired!) about the whole thing. There is no way i can go back part time for financial reasons, full time is the only option. i just keep telling myself that i will be fine after the initial shock of leaving ds.

are you putting your LO in nursery?

Yes she is going to a local childminder - who is lovely and well recommended but still wish it could be me at home with her. Before yesterday I kept telling myself I wasn't going back to work till next year but now we're in 2007 it's only a couple of days......

I'm going back on Thursday too!
I'm quite looking forward to it but I know that I will miss dd terribly.
I've had 8 months off and will be going back full-time. We could probably just about afford for me to go back part-time but it would be a strain and it would double the length of time for me to get to where I want to be professionally. My plan is to go back full-time now, when dd is 3 ttc again and then when I go back after that lot of mat leave then go part-time. Then I should only have to do 2 years of part-time at a salary that we can just afford before my promotion means we would be fine on my part-time wage. I'm the main earner here too but as dp works 4 days each week and one of then is Saturdays it does mean that childcare isn't going to be too much of a problem.

mummyemmy, i know what you mean about wishing she was with you. my mum is having my ds quite a lot while i am at work (his place in nursey isnt available until march) but i still dont want to leave him and it is my own mother (who is amazing with ds) who will have him most of the time!

i wont even go into the fact that my mil is having him 2 days a week until then and the thought of that makes me physically sick! (e havent seen eye to eye since ds was born)

i do however have a feeling that i am going to back to work and enjoy the adult company and ds will enjoy not having to be with the same person 24/7 (at least thats what im hoping for anyway!)

Feeling exactly the same. Finances dictating return to work. Hate it, hate having mortgage!!! Not fair!! Miss dd etc, etc.... Trying to put brava face on for dd though.

Tomorrow's the big day!

OH MY GOD!!

Feel a bit weepy tonight but hoping that it will be ok when I'm actually at work and busy. I'm getting a bit worried that I've forgotten everything that I used to know!

It's like going back to school - much harder after long summer holidays than after half term. I went back after 2 weeks having had the babies and that was nothing like as hard I suspect as if you have been off a long time. But I loved going back. Much easier and nicer than at home. You might find it the same.

Thanks Xenia.

The thing is that I know that if I stayed off much longer I would go mad and although I would be spending more time with dd I don't think I would be enjoying it as much. I suppose I'm just worried that she will miss me and not understand where I am and that I'm coming back although I know that she will get used to it.

I think they get used to it fairly soon. I was reading in anovel last weekend someone saying working parents' secret is that the more you're away from the children the less you miss them - like sex it said, the less you have of it the less you miss it.

Mummyemmy - (((hugs))). I know exactly where you're coming from. I'm going back a week on Monday - it sounds so close - also full time for financial reasons and I'm HATING the thought of it. I'm the main breadwinner here too. DH does contracting which he's giving up for the time being to look after DS. His work comes in fits and starts and isn't regular enough to justify paying for childcare all the time - his earnings and the cost of childcare would pretty much cancel each other out. After the last couple of days and his reactions to DS being unsettled I'm getting very worried about it. It's so ironic - I want to be at home but can't; he's not sure about being at home but he's gets to be. You're right, it's NOT FAIR!

Oh but Xenia, that makes me sad!

Work was ok today, a nice quiet morning and then really busy in the afternoon so I was kept well occupied. Dp said dd did seem to be looking around for me a bit but that she was fine.

LaDiDa, glad you were ok today. I'm sure it gets easier. (thats what i keep telling myself anyway) i have 3 days left with ds before i go back to work. to make matters worse ds is poorly atm and so is being very clingy! hopefully he will be better by monday, otherwise i dont think i will be able to leave him!

Mummyemmy - how did it go at work today?

Those of you already back at work, hope everything is going ok.

Reidy - will be thinking about you on Monday. Hope DS is better now - they say it is always harder for the parents!! DS has had 2 'settling' sessions at nursery this week - both went well and they said he has been as good as gold so I am feeling a bit more positive about it all.

its hard when you go back but its just about knowing they are safe,and dont worry when though the day you dont think of them,i think it is so easy to work than stay at home full time.i would love to work full time as home is as clean when youy come home.he he he.

Sorry to break the trend here, but I would like to own up to planning return to work and then backing out. One week before I was due to go back, I took my little boy to the nursery for a trail and I just could not hand him over! I don't regret it at all. Eight years later, I now work from home but it was a struggle to find the work. I recommend doing SOMETHING to keep your hand in, especially keeping up IT skills.

What do you do HerringBone (if you don't mind me asking?) I have to go back for 3 months otherwise I have to pay back about £1800 of maternity pay. But after that, I'd love to find something to do from home, even if I combine it with p/t work.

Do/did you work from home with your LO there Herringbone? I only ask because I recently started a thread about working from home (under an alter ego because I'd been whinging so much on other threads!) and the feedback was resoundingly negative.