leaving child @ daycare

[George73]

I am really worried that my son will not be ready or settled enough for me to leave at nursery.There is financial pressure for me to back to work be4 I want to. Has anyone any advice on how to make this an easier and happy transition???

George73 - how old is he?

He will be 5 months on June 5th. Plannig to go back to work July 7th.

I understand that 5-6 months is the best age to leave a baby as they can very easily adapt to a new environment. I have just gone back to work and left ds with childminder - he settled in immediatley and I have not noticed any change in behaviour - he is still happy! I left ds at the same age, she was a very difficult baby but again settled in from day 1. I think it is worse for you rather than the baby - you may try starting sending him for shorter days for the first week or so.

I have talked to the nursery manager and she's happy for him to go in for short visits to get him used to the different environment. I think you're right it is harder for me than him.Thanx fot the advice.

my spelling really is normally better then this!!!

7 months was perfect for us, both times as dds could sit up and hadn't started on separation anxiety by then - when they did, towards a year old, they were so used to the staff there that it was just the odd few tears only occasionally. odd visits imo aren't the answer, as routine is best. we had a one week settling period, where i was on premises but didn't see her until i took her home (after an hour the first day, 2 the 2nd etc). it is much worse for you than them.

Both mine started younger - at four months - and did fine, honest. As did I.

Mine started at 4.5 months and was fine. Was made easier as she started a couple of weeks before my maternity leave ended, and just did from 11-4 - time for a feed, a sleep and a "play".

But at first I was going up there at 2pm each day anyway to bf as it took ages for her to accept the bottle!

Just be really sure that he is happy to accept a bottle, and perhaps get him used to other people giving it to him. I bought a musical mobile of the type they had above the cots at nursery for home, but have no idea whether it helped.

George73, I am sorry that you are having to do something that you don't really want: and you may well feel much worse than your baby. He will be fine - how are you going to look after yourself during the transition? I got my Mum / DP to come with me the first couple of days that I dropped DS off, so that i didn't have to walk away alone. Get yourself, and your baby, used to the nursery routine a couple of days before you actually go back to work, otherwise your first day back will be hell, and the switch into 'work head' will suffer.

Mine started at 3 months and 6 months and were absolutely fine. A little bit of crying, but I cried the most......
It's hard in the beginning,but it gets easier as you all adjust to the new situation and you can see that your baby is happy. I think the settling -in time which most nurseries have is a good idea and you can always call them from work to see how your baby is doing in the beginning. Mine have thrived in nursery and DS now cries when I come to pick him up because he doesn't want to go home! I am so glad I settled them early, because I think it gets harder as they get older. When I see children who join my sons nursery at the age of 2-3 I can tell it takes them some time to get used to the nursery environment and many find it difficult to settle.

The way I did it to make things easier for myself was to give it 3-6 months. If my babies seemed desperatly unhappy I would take them out of nursery and find another arrangement/stop working. In my case it worked really well, but you can always change your mind if you find nursery doesn't suit your baby.

Good luck. I am sure you'll both be fine!

dd started at nursery when she was 7 mths old, and is now 2 and loves it. We had a settling in period for the first few weeks before I went back to work, where she would stay for 2 hrs, then 3, then 4 etc and this got her used to it slowly. She definitely adjusted to it far more quickly than me - took me about 3 mths to get used to leaving her each day.
All you can do is try it for a few mths and see how you both are, you'll soon know if it's working out or not.
Good luck

DD started at 3.5 months and she was absolutely fine. It wasn't until she was about 2 that she started crying and getting clingy when I left her but she got through that phase. Now at 4 she's started getting a bit clingy and not wanting to go again, although she doesn't cry, but I think that may be down to anxiety with new baby on the way.
For the most part nursery has been fantastic for her and I think really helped her develop, especially social skills as she's made lots of friends, one of whom is going on to big school with her.
Think of it as a great opportunity you're giving him

I think age is on youe side, DS started at 4 months and settled fine, DD has just started at 11 months and it has been more difficult but she is getting used to it. I'm sure what others say about it being worse for you are right.

DD went to nursery from 21 weeks and she settled immediately and has loved it ever since. She is now 25 months, and adores going to her nursery. DD never (and still doesn't) had a proper routine at home but she quickly and easily fit into a nursery routine with no problems at all.

thanx for all the reassuring advice the only stumble is son has stopped taking from a bottle. Am breastfeeding but used to give him a bottle or partner did every now and then. Am still persevering wih it though but how long do I keep trying for???