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Original poster

Feel overwhelmed with hrs on my "part time" job

27 replies

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2015 18:15

my contract is for 19 hrs which worked well when dcs were small and i needed schools hrs.We had a take over and this continued.When someone left on a weeks notice we all had to take on extras as it was a busy time for us .I was doing 30 something hrs which was ok as dcs are much older and can cook for themselves.The first colleague wasnt replaced then another who did 50 plus left and hasnt been replaced either.Luckily or uni students picked up some hrs and i did 43 sometimes which is far too much for me.I work shifts and it is exhausting and my df is dying which has caused a huge strain and anxiety.I have asked at meetings for less hrs and asked my line manager too.I have now 2 40 hr weeks.Acas said employers can add hrs and the 19 is a minimum.I have applied to other places .I loved my job previously but find juggling family life and ill realatives too much.I m not the sort of person to phone in sick...HELP :(

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atticusclaw2 · 26/08/2015 18:17

Im not sure why ACAS said employers can add hours. Are you sure they said that? Its completely incorrect.

atticusclaw2 · 26/08/2015 18:19

When did you start working the extra hours though? If you've been doing them for a long time your employer might assert that your contract has changed (I'm an employment lawyer).

confusedandemployed · 26/08/2015 18:23

What does your contract say? I agree with atticus, employers cannot just add hours willy nilly.

If you feel you're doing too much then simply tell your employer that you will only be able to work your contracted hours from now on - assuming they are what you want to work. If they are not you need to make a flexible working request.

Playnicelyforfiveminutes · 26/08/2015 18:33

Your partner is literally terminally I'll? Or do you mean feels like he is dying?
It sounds like you mean the first, in which case surely you are entitled to compassionate benefits of some kind so you don't need to work ? How awful that you are having to worry about silly bills and unimportant job when you are going through that! There MUST be some help out there for people in your position... Sorry if I have taken it wrong

Original poster

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2015 18:42

Sorry my df is dying of cancer and i live in the same town mum is his carer and he has been very ill several weeks this yr resulting in me going in late twice then one week off when he went to A and E and hospice nurses sent him an end of life pack as he will die at home.
Mum also is in remission from stage 4 cancer and my dh is suffering a slipped disc and problems since his major heart attack 18 months ago.My employer knows this and i am struggling as a fulltimer hasnt been replaced for months .Students have helped and are back to uni next week.I have had interviews but feel reluctant to leave when my life is already stressful.
I have expressed a wish to do 30 but 40 plus is making me ill.

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Original poster

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2015 19:05

I guess by helping for 5 or 6 months does this mean i have upped my hrs by default eventhough i was doing it to help the team .?

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Playnicelyforfiveminutes · 26/08/2015 19:14

Gosh that's horrible! Your father is dying at home and your mum is recovering and your husband has serious medical conditions? I am shocked that you are so lucid and able to thunk clearly at all... I may be very naive but I cannot imagine that anyone in your shoes actually has to worry about calling in sick or annoying their boss? Poor poor you.. I'd be a total useless nervous wreck.. Sorry if I'm being dim but my only thought is that you call in sick with stress... If anyone ever had good reason, then this is it. Are you worried about money? You have been there for a long time so surely you are entitled to full pay while you get through this horrible scary sad time? I think you need to focus on keeping your self together.. I'm so sorry you are going through such a sad time.. You need to be looked after too

Playnicelyforfiveminutes · 26/08/2015 19:19

An employment lawyer! Real advice! Where did I get the idea that the employee always holds all the cards when it comes to sickness : /

Original poster

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2015 19:31

well i dont want to let pple down however the gp gave me a sicknote for 2 weeks which i went back after 1, for goodwill.I am not worried about money i have life savings and yes i think i got paid last time i was off.My df has just had another "bad week" we dont know when his cancer will progress too far but he was given a yr in march and has weight loss.The cancer is everywhere incl his spine.He had had it 3 yrs now.

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Playnicelyforfiveminutes · 26/08/2015 19:43

If only everyone else was so thoughtful of others! You sound ever so brave and caring, but you have allready worked really hard and extra hours for them, you have done more than enough.. It's a job, which you no longer enjoy or particularly need money from, it's a no brainer in my opinion, you call ASAP and say you aren't able to come in any more, then you focus on your family and yourself. If your boss tries to hammer you with contractural obligations after hearing your story, then they don't deserve your concern. Oh bless you.. I hope things get better.

Playnicelyforfiveminutes · 26/08/2015 19:46

My mum died slowly of secondary brain cancer at home.. My sister and I barely managed to care for her despite nurses coming twice a day, it was very traumatic and we had neither kids or jobs at the time. You sound like you have had to be strong for your family, but you must be gentle with yourself too x

EBearhug · 26/08/2015 20:02

Don't underestimate the stress of having a dying parent. Even if you were still only doing 19 hours, you might be struggling. Focus on yourself and what you need. Work will have to fit in round that, rather than have you run round ragged trying to pick up the pieces for everyone.

Take care of yourself - it's such a difficult time, and it can be easy to lose track of how much it's affecting you.

(I nearly ended up on a discplinary when my father was dying, but my manager at the time had been through it with his own father, and took me aside and said, "You need to get help, else I will have to do something about your lack of output at the moment, and we both know that won't help you right now." I hope you have some support like that at work.)

Original poster

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2015 20:19

So sorry you ve both been through this.No i dont have support at all just selfish colleagues who dont even ask about Dad.You are both right and im sorry you ve been through this.

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Original poster

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2015 21:16

I long for my old hrs when the dcs were small i did do extras but they asked first :(

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EBearhug · 26/08/2015 22:51

People here have been through it - and come out the other side - hold on to that, because you will too, though it will probably feel impossible at times, with all you have on.

lorelei9 · 26/08/2015 22:56

OP what are you worried will happen if you tell them you must reduce your hours? Your contract is key here. Sounds very odd advice from ACAS.

Original poster

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2015 23:09

I have told them repeatedly they have ignored me.Tonight i was offered another job a stones throw away hrs to be confirmed as i told them i want about 30.Other people where i work have had so many shifts back to back theyve had to leave.I probably will take the new job as it i a better work and less pressured and a great chance for someone my age to progress and not take a step backwards :)

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atticusclaw2 · 26/08/2015 23:17

Good news about the new job. However, if you want to stay in the old job my advice is that you approach your manager and tell her that since you are currently dealing with a number of personal issues you need to work only your 19 contracted hours for the time being and will not be able to take on any additional hours. Your employer cannot compel you to work additional hours unless you have a clause in your contract obliging you to work compulsory overtime. The fact that you have worked the extra hours for 5-6 months isn't helpful but you are assisted by the fact that the hours haven't been consistent. It would therefore be more difficult for your employer to argue that you have agreed to vary your contract.

lorelei9 · 26/08/2015 23:21

Great that you have something in the pipeline

When I said "have you told them" what I meant was emailing them saying "next week I will only do x time to y time, on these days" and stick to it.

I was once asked to take on extra duties in a job and I said, sure, give me the date the new pay starts on. My manager faffed and didn't get the HR confirmation to me in time. So I told her, no extra duties till it is all formalised. They can't keep you in the office when you say "I'm off home". That's why I wondered what you are worried about, do you think they will sack on you the spot? I doubt they'd try that. They need you too much. So stand up for your rights.

Original poster

whatisforteamum · 27/08/2015 02:54

Itt isnt an office but a kitchen they could leave me in it or make my life more difficult.Several others have left.That is why we are short staffed.

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lorelei9 · 27/08/2015 09:41

you mean leave you alone in the kitchen? Then you'd be entitled to walk out and start a case.

I'm really sorry you are going through all of this and a horrible workplace but from everything you are saying, it would serve them right if you just leave. If you can afford to, I would. to you.

Original poster

whatisforteamum · 27/08/2015 10:46

The last head chef did just that.I am not alone but it is very busy so vital my colleagues are communicating and helpful.I dont understand as i havent seen the positions advertised.Not sure if someone is keeping us short to gain a bonus.Even so its been many months now.Morale is v low.

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Original poster

whatisforteamum · 27/08/2015 14:42

I am giving my notice in today.The new people at the other job are respectful and it is more money.I am sooo happy :)

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EBearhug · 27/08/2015 20:15

Great news - and good luck with everything else. At least this might reduce some of the burden.

Original poster

whatisforteamum · 01/09/2015 11:19

Thank you Ebearhug.My colleagues were shocked im leaving as was my boss.I have always worked hard and been PRO my workplace.I felt sad on the w end when i thought i cant go there again (very pretty pub and gardens).
I have lovely people to work with a few of whom i worked with before.I feel a bit sad tbh after 11 yrs and while df has been v ill again i feel my life is changing alot.I am leaving on good terms.

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