can someone help re workplace bully

[holdingontight]

I'll try to be brief and not drip feed but really struggling today. think it is all coming to a head as I have a meeting.

I am 1 year in post, a department of 9 and up until recently worked autonomously. good results, glowing appraisals and pay rise. i have a colleague who is notoriously tricky - hard to manage, does her own thing rather than follow instructions, misses deadlines etc. she is not professionally trained in her role rather has 'earned' it after expressing interest and a long long time with the company. I have a 25 year career, so happens am professionally qualified to do the job she does, but work now in a slightly different role.

Bullying has been constant, undermining, nit picking, copying in management and colleagues every time she feels she can pick me up on something. at a recent training event her hostility and resentment to me was noticed by delegates and the course leader.

it is really unpleasant. after latest email where a day was spent picking apart my correspondence trying to trip me up I went to my boss. who says yes holding, we have all seen it happen but you are not the first. this is what she is like yes she is tricky but you have to educate her about your job. she doesn't understand the value of your job and it is up to you to explain your decisions.

so now I have a meeting with boss and colleagues. boss has billed it as 'settling differences and departmental relationships'. WTF is going on? how do i deal with this? colleagues openly hostile now and after 6 months of struggling I am a wreck. Is this NPD at work? is my boss right - is there no bullying just a personality clash?

sorry for long post and typos etc. any wise words appreciated.

Not sure what NPD is, but you've got a very classic bullying case on your hands. First, the bully fears your power since you are properly qualified and trained. You're better at your job and more popular, yes? In her eyes it's a power struggle.

Second, management are helpless to do anything about it. Hence the downplaying of what is actually going on. ( Dressing it up as a personality clash.)

Sorry, but the next step is likely to be a shifting of the blame to you and gradually you will become the problem--not the bully.

I've been there and walked away in the end. I really feel for you and I hope someone comes along with more constructive advice. I've done a lot of reading around the subject and have concluded that looking for justice and hoping management will sort it out rarely happens. Try to distance yourself somehow, transfer into a diferent team maybe?

Most of all, look after yourself.

It absolutely sucks - and your management are spineless. I've seen this often - one person causing a toxic atmosphere in a team and management will not act.

The only advice I have for the meeting is to to keep your cool and be absolutely factual and dispassionate. When you're in that meeting, really take note of the atmosphere - are management genuinely trying to fix this or are they weakly going through the motions? If the latter, then it's time to put yourself first and transfer out if that department. She won't change, and they won't deal with it effectively. That's not good for you.

It's such a crap situation to be in, but look around for interdepartmental moves, and when you leave, be honest with your boss 'loved the job, x made things very difficult for me, toxic atmosphere, disappointed with the way management dealt with it, thus, leaving.'

Or, you could be in my situation, where the toxic horror just got promoted. :(