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Original poster

Husband wants to own my business... Heavy heart

11 replies

CharlotteOPO · 06/03/2015 10:40

Hi, I'm retraining into the therapeutic field and will qualify in September. My husband is self employed and tells me I'll have to invoice my clients through his company, he just made me a secretary of his company and gave some shares in order to save on taxes. I feel as it is a way to have control on me as he likes to make some allusions about me having a lover (when I dress nicely) or planning to quit him. I don't - but all of this situation gives me a heavy heart. I feel alone and don't know who to speak to. I've alays wanted to have my own business and want my kids to be proud off their mother. I want to ensure I am building a fiancial indepenence for myself just in case. I've stopped working for 3 years now in order to look after my 2 young kids. what do you think?

OP posts:

Schoolaroundthecorner · 06/03/2015 10:44

I think set up on your own. Have control of your own work and income and tell him to take a flying jump. Get independent financial advice and tell your husband it's yours business and he has no say.

Only agree to any arrangement like this if it is more beneficial to you. Doesn't sound like it in this case

AugustaGloop · 06/03/2015 10:44

You should take advice. it might make sense for you to set up a company, but there is no reason why it needs to be his company.

Schoolaroundthecorner · 06/03/2015 10:45

Also the other issues you write about are of even more concern, he sounds extremely controlling and jealous and has no right to tell you to do anything. I'd consider the future of this relationship and in no way would I give him any ownership or input into your own business.

PeterParkerSays · 06/03/2015 10:47

Does your husband work in the same field? If not, why does he think it would be appropriate for your clients to be invoiced through his company? It would really put me off as a customer. Stick to your guns and get advice on setting up your own business.

WaxOnWaxOff · 06/03/2015 10:47

I think you should

arrange a meeting with an independent small business advisor
re-post this in 'relationships'

ImperialBlether · 06/03/2015 10:51

If I were you I'd let him say whatever he wanted, then make sure I was completely separate from him by September.

misscph1973 · 06/03/2015 11:12

My husband and I are both self-employed. We jointly own a Ltd company that we work through although our businesses as nothing in common. We save money on accounting fees and running costs. But we do earn similarily.

While I can see why you wuld want to work independent from your husbands company, it might make a lot of sense financially. Get your husbands company accountant to confirm this.

Geoff0409 · 08/03/2015 23:01

Hi Charlotte,

A man's view on this.

I think if I did this to my Wife then not only would I probably get a b*llocking, it would completely undermine everything that she had achieved. It's not really up to him.

I am not an expert when it comes to the way businesses are run and how to save money, but it is your thing and if you would like to be in control then thst is what you should do. Tell DH this but also tell him you would like jis input and any tips and advice.

Lots of luck and well done.

Lweji · 08/03/2015 23:05

In a happy marriage, I'd still say that I'd make sure first that I would have an equal share and input (director?) if I was going to use such scheme.
If you are not particularly happy in the marriage, keep it separately as it will save you trouble.

MrsRossPoldark · 13/04/2015 15:59

Having run a business with my DH it was the worst thing we could have done. He turned my little 'cottage business' into a limited company with all the legal stuff that entailed. The business failed and the fallout was horrendous. We are still together but it just proved that we think about life and the universe in totally different ways. My DH is a control freak too and I'm only just finding ways to handle him. He means well, but has a heavy handed way of getting me to do things I'd rather not. It's taken years for me to stand up for myself and say 'no'.

Unless he is genuinely doing it to save you money, take advice from an accountant please!

Cinnamoncookie · 13/04/2015 16:17

You said your DH made you a secretary of his company. Please get legal advice or check on the Companies House website, as if it is a Ltd company, being Company Secretary carries legal duties, liabilities and responsibilities, which may include being financially liable.

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