role reversal...

[alicatsg]

I'm about to go back to work and my beloved husband has taken a career break to look after equally beloved son. I love my job and frankly earn much more than other half but now am getting panicy about it. Will he cope? How can I train him in fine art of laundry (came home to pooey baby trousers in bucket of water and shampoo today)? Is anyone else in a similar situation ?

My Dh has been a HouseHusband for 6+ years - he's better at cleaning and washing then I ever was - I still do most of the cooking tho' It's worked great for us - slight shortage of Dad & Baby changing rooms and swimming can be fun (dd in Mens changing or DH in womens)
Good Luck - he can always ask Mumsnet for advise

My DH has been my 'Domestic Engineer' for just over 3 years and has been doing a fabulous job. Somehow they manage. Many times when I put my 2p in he says sarcastically but jokingly 'I don't now how I ever manage through the day without you'. I think you just have to be prepared that they might not see things the way we do (especially in relation to laundry)- as long as the kids are safe that is the most important thing to me. I must admit - mine is fantastic though - dinner ready when I get home (an absolute must although sometimes I have to remind him about what is 'good' for me), occasionally when I beg hard enough he'll do my ironing, 2 DDs to look after (1 is autistic-many appointments), maintains the groceries and every now and then he will dye my hair - but then some days he spends 'too much time on playstation or watching DVDs' - oh well!. Sometimes you just can't win but remember - they are from Mars - right???? I still think mine is a 'keeper'.

alicatsg, we've just done this and we're both really happy with it. It's early days for us but so far he's great, much better than me. Partly I suspect due to spending a lot less time on mumsnet than I used to He'll learn, just like all of us had to...

alicatsg i wouldnt panic to much men seem to have a way of copeing more than we sometimes give them credit for there will be a few ups and downs along the way but hey us women go through the same im sure you husband will be great my dp is a stay at home father but for medical reasons i have to stay home as well but as long as they were house trained by there mothers they cope better than us women at times

There is a "homedads" website, a bit like mumsnet for full time at home dads. something like www.homedads.co.uk

I think men on there have some local networks, otherwise it's worth trying to find toddler groups with other men in, my dp managed to find one group with 5 fathers who used to meet up sometimes. They can get really isolated and mothers can be a bit reluctant to be friendly which can be a problem if the men aren't too confident already.

can't help you on the laundry training front, dp is still totally hopeless on cleaning. and if pooey clothes get as far as being soaked in a bucket you are doing better than my dp who would leave them in a bag for weeks...

but otherwise it works really well for us all and the dds have a great relationship with their father.