Working and coping with everything else in life!

[wangle99]

Not sure if this is the right forum....

How on earth do you all cope with working and life in general. Although I work part-time I do alot of ours, am self employed so with what I do at home towards my business it is probably full time.

Add in housework etc.

Ferrying DS to nursery, DD from school (thank god I don't do morning run), homework, music practise.

I'm sinking! Are you all mega organised? DH is crap so might as well be single parent (but that's another story).

Reckon I should up my wine consumption in the evening to block it all out lol then won't notice the house is a pigsty!

Any words of wisdom, tips etc greatly appreciated.

I can't (!), but many others on here can afford a cleaner and it sounds wonderful.

Any good?

"DH is crap so might as well be single parent (but that's another story). "

No, it is quite relevant.

But, what about a local teenager to come be a bit of "mother's help" whilst you work/look after the kids. Get her to do the tidying/organising, and maybe some cleaning. Depending on where you are I would think you could get this for £5 or £6 per hour in cash. Even if it was just 3 hours a week it would probably help.

I don't know how you do it - I do some proof reading at home a few mornings and now 1 morning conversation class for a german student and even that is enough. As in your case, dh is also useless so I daren't even get ill as there is no one to look after the kids (living in Berlin)
I think if you both work and dh doesn't want to help and share the housework and other responsibilities you need a cleaner or an au pair ..some sort of help.

I would'nt worry too much, no one with children and an interesting life has a perfect house! - I am 29 wks PG and have a pre-schooler, I work 5 hours a day, DH works 8, and we're on seperate shifts to avoid paying childcare for DD when she's home.

Can't you do a rota and get the kids to help with a bit of housework, in exchange for pocket money or a treat??

And tell DH if he contributes to the mess, and eats the food and wears the clothes the least he can do is vaccum and wash-up and put laundry away.

Have to say I am very lucky, DH is a star, to be honest at the moment he does more than me - not always practically but he does try!

I have a cleaner for 4 hours a week, so at least the house is fairly clean

Childminder for before and after school (pay for every day, but don't use every day)

Have enough school uniform to allow for a change of shirt and socks every day, and some spare for accidents, and wash only at weekends.

School lunches, so I don't have to waste time making dd's lunch up.

Dishwasher, so don't have to wash up much

Milk,Fruit/ veg box delivered, so don't have to worry too much about shopping. Big shop for essentials about once a fortnight

Basically, it costs . So does the wine

I dont think it has to cost - just needs forward thinking and involving everyone. Even my DD (3 on Thursday) does her bit of tidying toys when finsihed with, and she likes to help me with the washing by taking it through to the machine when I bring it down stairs.

I think you just need to involve your family more - 'many hands make light work'

I don't know if this helps in your situation. I work full time. 5 days a week. 8 to 10 hours a day (depending on workload). The way I see it is I go home and forego overtime pay to see my kids, but not to do housework. So, you might adapt something similar.

Does your DH come home every night or work away sometimes. I have some sympathy if he works away. But, if he comes home, could he say clean the kitchen if you do the cooking. Could he drop off at the childminder and you pick up? You might make a list of all the household chores and propose a more realistic division.

I would say that you have to get your dh more involved - I work f/t and only have one dd (she's 2.2 and goes to nursery atm) but without dh's input I'd disappear under the weight of things to do. It's hard enough as it is - the weekend should be our time with dd but she spent most of yesterday parked in front of CBeebies while we sorted out the garden and shovelled the muck out of the corners of the bathroom.

Get a cleaner if you can afford it (wish I could) and be ready for the next day the night before - I lay out clothes, pack bags etc before I go to bed.

I try and keep up with the washing by washing and ironing a load a day but that doesn't always happen!

I try and maintain the philosophy that life is too short to have a clean house and tidy garden all the time, but I will admit that the house being a mess annoys the hell out of me.

It is a nightmare coping with everything, but eventually a routine comes, without you realising it.

I work full time on a flexi time basis. We have to leave very early as I can't do the school run but I do collect for half the week.

I sometimes feel like I'm always doing the housework and its always on a catch up basis. As fast as I tidy/pack away, someone's emptying a cupboard/toybox behind me. Then there's the washing and ironing, shopping to do, its like a conveyorbelt that never stops. I let the ironing pile up or iron as little as possible.

I give myself one evening a week where I do nothing once the ds are both in bed. Well, nothing but see off a large glass of wine.

I think the mother's help and the cleaner are both excellent ideas. I also think the rest of the family should help out more.

Hope it gets easier!

I am a single parent & I am ridiculously organised - its the only way I can manage. However, I do have an aupair & she is probably more help than my ex-husband ever was!!!! As well as a bit of childcare when I'm at work, she irons the kids clothes, changes their bedlinen & helps with tidyup time & loading & unloading the dishwasher. Never have to nag her, she is polite, clean & tidy - better than a DH or DP any day of the week .

Hmmm, bugsy, that sounds ideal. Might have to trade DH in for au pair.

Just kidding, of course.

had to threaten dh with divorce if he didnt help out more, now does the easy stuff like the dishes and loading the washing machine. Would love an au pair or cleaner but cannot spare the cash as I dropped my hours to spend more time with dd. Manage to keep on top of most things but does mean ironing in front of tv twice a week. dd does his own. I think we all find a routine of sorts. good luck (could have cleaned the bathroom in the time this took!