Really don't know what to do

[Beccarollover]

Im at work so cant really type much but just need to offload

I started back at work a month ago - 3 days a week
Childcare fees have just gone up

I earn 520 a month after tax - childcare is 604 a month - DPS salary has recently gone up so we dont qualify for any help anymore with the childcare.

So for me to leave my babies at nursery and be rushed off my feet morning and evening (leave house at 7.45 get back at 6.15)3 days a week Im paying almost 100 quid for the privelage not to mention petrol/lunches/work clothes.

WHAT TO DO THOUGH!!

Company operates bonus quarterly so might end up getting some cash for coming to work but it isnt enough to cover fees etc

DD starts school in September/October where fees will go down but will have to pay for before and after school care.

What would you do?

Its for 2 so actually rather cheap - would have cost a grand or more if they had stayed at DD's previous nursery.

I dont HATE the job either - get on pleasantly with my colleagues and the days pass reasonably and if I was getting a bit more I think I would be less demotivated - although still sure its not what I want as my life long career - Im much more a people person than a bloody software person lol

You'll all right, I've been thick here Just confused me with Becca talking about it as though only she were responsible.

Becca - I can see by your list of pros and cons it's a really hard decision. Is it a decision you could postpone for a month or two? I know you've only just started the job, you may well feel less insecure in a month or two (I find it takes me a good couple of months to "settle" in a new job), will have a clearer idea if you're likely to get a raise/good bonus, etc.

I think if you can hang on for a bit longer it might all become a bit clearer which path is the best for you and your family.

I too think it might be best to stick it out, at least until you move and you might feel happier then. Are your children any less happy now you work? If things don't improve and you would be happier at home full time and don't mind being dependent on your dp, then maybe that would be a better choice. It's a tough one, admittedly.

Your right Georgina (cheque in the post btw).....I should postone deciding - I cant help but think if I'd known the implications of it ll earlier I would have stayed at home until DD started school in sep thus caring solely for DS until he was 1 - seeing DD through the start of school and got a job once childcare was lower - Im pissed off with myself for not doing that

Becca - can you take a career break? That means you can return to your job (up to 5 years later) and therefore stay at home at the moment? What does your employer have on offer? No point counting your salary for mortgage purposes if you actually do not have that money in the pot (childcare).

You don't need to pay me for good advice you know,

Hindsight is always 20-20. You made the best decision you could with the information you had at the time. There is nothing to gain from feeling guilty or beating yourself up about doing what you considered best.

The flip side is that once the kids are settled into nursery a bit more they will probably get a tremendous amount out of it... Yes, they'll probably get every bug going to start with, which is a pain, but then at least they won't be getting all the bugs when they start school instead!!

Give yourself a deadline by which to make a decision by, whether it's a firm date (like 1 or 2 months from now) or by a certain milestone (like house move). Try not to worry too much in the meantime. You are a good mother, you are doing great.

Its only my 4th week in the job - surely I couldnt career break already!? Not sure what the policy is on that TBH

On top of all this, don't get paid for holidays, so for Good friday Im going to be minus another 70 for this month.

There is an ex council house for sale nearby - same price as this one but the extra bedroom too - wondering if we could go for something like that so our mortgage stayed the same to give me the freedom to not be earning and not worry

OK - why is it that that this situation wasnt bothering me too much but today feels like the end of the world!! Having a little cry now - sort yer head out becca - I think Ive been doing my best ostrich impression until now! lol

stopped crying off for ciggie and a turkish delight - thanks for the advice girls it is really helping to work through my options

Presumably you'd have to pay back maternity pay if you resigned now? Wait until you have served the minimum time (is it 3 months?) to avoid paying back, and then your DD is almost in school... I'd think it's worth holding onto the job unless you hate it. ARe you getting pension and NI benefits? Don't discount the value of those.

What do you mean, they don't pay you for holidays? That's illegal!

becca - work the 13 weeks (I think that is how long) that you need to work so that you don't have to pay your maternity pay back then quit

Don't work if you don't have to AND ESPECAILLY if you are WORSE OFF by working!!

I know how you feel babe!!!

FRom the EOC website:
What public holidays/ bank holidays am I entitled to?

To comply with the law, an employer must treat you as a part-time worker equally to a full-time worker. Often part-time employees work fixed days each week which can put part-timers at a disadvantage. For example, most bank and public holidays fall on a Monday, so that staff who usually work at the end of the week would receive fewer days off work. To avoid this situation employers should give all part-time workers a proportinate (pro-rata) entitlement of days off, according to the number of hours worked.

Would I have to pay back maternity pay even though it wasnt them paying it??? My Dad paid my maternity pay...

The holiday scenario its very confusing

I get paid a daily rate for working but dont get paid for the days I dont do - this apparently factors in holidays etc - i get a monetary equivalent of the holidays I would be entitled to...

I don't understand about how your holiday is factored in??? You are entitled to paid holidays and paid bank holidays just like fulltime workers. It sounds as if you don't have any paid holidays, and that is illegal.

If they didn't pay you any maternity pay then you certainly don''t have to pay it back - actually I'll check the law on that.
In the meantime, this:
Part-time workers

The majority of part-time workers are women and therefore any less favourable treatment of part-timers will have a disproportionate impact on women.

Examples of discrimination in pay against part-time workers

Being paid at a lower hourly rate, or less than the pro-rata salary, of full-time workers

Having less access to other pay benefits (such as occupational pension, bonuses, shift pay, sick pay) compared with full-time workers

Receiving less than pro-rata entitlement to non-pay benefits (such as holiday entitlement) received by full-time workers.

Requirement to justify different treatment of part-timers

It is now beyond doubt that a pay practice which results in full-timers being paid more than female part-timers is prima facie discriminatory unless it can be objectively justified on factors unrelated to any discrimination on the grounds of sex. For example:

In Bilka-Kaufhaus GmbH, part-timers had been excluded from joining an occupational pension scheme on the basis that employing full-time workers involved lower ancillary costs and facilitated the use of staff throughout opening hours (the employer in this case was a department store). The ECJ held that this did not amount to justification in the circumstances of this case.

In Rinner-Kuhn v FWW Spezial-Gebaudereinigung GmbH [1989] IRLR 493, the ECJ said that an employer cannot justify excluding part-timers from benefits on the grounds that they are less connected and committed to the organisation than full-timers.

I don't understand about how your holiday is factored in??? You are entitled to paid holidays and paid bank holidays just like fulltime workers. It sounds as if you don't have any paid holidays, and that is illegal.

If they didn't pay you any maternity pay then you certainly don''t have to pay it back - actually I'll check the law on that.
In the meantime, this:
Part-time workers

The majority of part-time workers are women and therefore any less favourable treatment of part-timers will have a disproportionate impact on women.

Examples of discrimination in pay against part-time workers

Being paid at a lower hourly rate, or less than the pro-rata salary, of full-time workers

Having less access to other pay benefits (such as occupational pension, bonuses, shift pay, sick pay) compared with full-time workers

Receiving less than pro-rata entitlement to non-pay benefits (such as holiday entitlement) received by full-time workers.

Requirement to justify different treatment of part-timers

It is now beyond doubt that a pay practice which results in full-timers being paid more than female part-timers is prima facie discriminatory unless it can be objectively justified on factors unrelated to any discrimination on the grounds of sex. For example:

In Bilka-Kaufhaus GmbH, part-timers had been excluded from joining an occupational pension scheme on the basis that employing full-time workers involved lower ancillary costs and facilitated the use of staff throughout opening hours (the employer in this case was a department store). The ECJ held that this did not amount to justification in the circumstances of this case.

In Rinner-Kuhn v FWW Spezial-Gebaudereinigung GmbH [1989] IRLR 493, the ECJ said that an employer cannot justify excluding part-timers from benefits on the grounds that they are less connected and committed to the organisation than full-timers.

PART-TIME WORK

The Part-time Workers (Prevention of Less Favourable Treatment) Regulations 2000 introduced new rights for part-time workers.

The measures reinforce the Government's policy of putting in place decent minimum standards whilst promoting a flexible and competitive workforce.

Two amendments to the Regulations came into force on 1 October 2002. These cover Comparators (Regulation 2) and Access to Occupational Pension Scheme (Regulation 8(8)).

The Part-time workers regulations ensure that Britain's part-timers are not treated less favourably than comparable full-timers in their terms and conditions, unless it is objectively justified. This means part-timers are entitled, for example, to:
the same hourly rate of pay,
the same access to company pension schemes,
the same entitlements to annual leave and maternity/parental leave on a pro rata basis,
the same entitlement to contractual sick pay, and
no less favourable treatment in access to training.

BR - I work in HR and don't know of any companies that require staff to pay back maternity pay. If you are paid the minimum in maternity pay that the government states then no company is entitled to ask you to pay back maternity pay. You are legally entitled to it. If they pay you more then they could probably put something in stating you would need to reimburse them but any company doing this is treading on thin ice in terms of tribunal cases.

You certainly wouldn't have to pay any money back to your current employer if they didn't pay your maternity pay.

In terms of your current financial situation and the fact you were head hunted would it be possible for you to talk to someone in the business about how you are feeling. You might be surprised at what their reaction is. For a company to invest so much money in having you work for them it is not worth their while to just let you go. Look at it from the businesses point of view, it takes on average a minimum of 6 months to recoup the costs of recruiting someone. Someone recruited through a headhunter will take even longer to recoup costs for. Remember they chose you over other people so there are skills and qualitities you have that are valuable to them.

I don't know how large your company is but best practice is for HR or someone in the business to meet with you between 1-3 months after you started to see how things are going. Maybe you could suggest a meeting like this if they don't undertake them themselves and you should raise the issue of how you are feeling etc. It's natural to have these feelings of not being as competent as the others and so on.

Finally, I know it's easy for me to say and not everyone is open and responsive so you may feel like you can't do it but weigh up who would be the best person and test the waters first if you want. Good luck.

becca - at my work, i had to work 13 weeks after my maternity finisihed and then could 'leave' and not have to pay maternity back....

if i went back to work and then left before I have worked 13 weeks i would have had to pay some of money back

not sure how you stand since you left one job, got maternity, then started another....
did you get terms and conditions about maternity booklet from last employer?
I have mine at work and could get it tomorrow if you want it - though it will probably be slightly different to yours.....let me know

Here are the figures....

Im on 16k pro rataed which would be 9660 a year with pro rataed holidays

What I get instead is 70 per day worked which if I worked ALL days available (3 days a week for 52 week = 10,920

So, I think that the difference between the two is the monetary version of what my holidays are worth but if I take a day off I lose 70 pounds, also, on Good Friday and other bank holidays I would normally be there I lose 70 pounds.

Meanmum - thanks for that information - when I say headhunted, its probably just me showing off - it was more a case that rather than me job hunting I was approached by the MD and asked if I'd like the job so not a proper headhunt

I doubt they would put my wages up - I ended up getting 2k less than I negotiated for..

Ok so they didn't pay for a headhunter but they still did headhunt you which means something. It still costs them to work you into their business and recoup costs. Costs include just you sitting at your desk at the moment and even though you are working now for them to recoup costs and have you fully operational on average still takes 6 months. Of course you got less than you negotiated for but that is standard. I certainly hope you asked for at least 4k more than you wanted so they could knock you down. My view on life (when I'm job hunting) is that I ask for around 5k more than I really want, let them bargain me down a few k and then everyone is happy. I got at least what I wanted if not slightly more, they think they got a bargain because they didn't pay my asking price and everyone gets on well. Obviously when I'm recruiting I'm much tougher than this.

Popsycal - how can your company ask for maternity money back if you leave within 13 weeks. I am astounded. Was it just the normal government allowance or something over and above this. We ask for money back if we assist staff to obtain qualifications that we haven't asked them to get, therefore, happy to help them further educate themselves and then they leave in a certain time but that's the only time we do it.

I would be inclined to leave Becca and go for the ex-council house with the extra bedroom so there is no pressure to go out to work until you find something that you want to do. Although I may not be the best person to listen to as I haven't worked properly (I do a bit of work here and there for DH who has his own business) for over five years and am not in the least bit career minded.