So gutted I'm not being kept on

[girlynut]

Almost finished a one year fixed term contract as a paralegal at a large regional law firm. Took the position last sept having no previous law firm experience with a view to them offering me a training contract at the end of the year.

I was very much thrown in the deep end, given a caseload to run (covering mat leave for a legal exec) and my supervising solicitor was often out of the office or busy or in a foul unapproachable mood, nevertheless I've used my initiative and just got on with it. I did raise the issue of poor supervision with the training partner and the head of dept. both suggested I speak to my boss but he just said I was doing fine and I would learn from my mistakes. At my review the feedback was good (but not documented) Client feedback had been great - flowers, cards, lunch invites.

I've thrown myself into the role being actively involved with marketing, social and charity events. Colleagues say I'm very friendly and approachable.

Today I had a meeting with the training partner and they're not keeping me on. The feedback from my boss was that I was generally good but left important matters in abeyance and didn't seek guidance from him when necessary. He also raised my discretion as an issue as I was overheard telling someone that my boss had been grumpy recently due to splitting with his gf (yes, stupid of me I know)

I'm so devastated. There is no appeal process and hr say the best I can do is put in writing if I feel the feedback is unfair. I think I've done really well with minimal supervision and for the decision to be based on feedback from one person who's clearly stitched me up feels totally unjust.

Colleagues who I've told have all been gob-smacked. They and I thought it was in the bag.

I don't know what to do now. I'll be given time off for interviews and cv help but I don't want to go anywhere else. I loved it here. I can't stop crying.

Sorry for rambling on. I just feel like I've wasted an opportunity by not being more assertive about the lack of supervision but I didn't want to rock the boat when trying to make a good impression.

Just let it go and put it down to experience.

You now have 12 months under your belt so just tell the next employer that it was a 12 month contract and the lady came back from maternity leave. It's not at all unusual.

We've all made the mistake of spilling the beans at some point. We've also had to struggle on our own without input from the powers that be and then been criticised at a later date. What I am saying is, none of this is unusual. Don't fight it. Thank them for the input and the opportunity and move on. They don't actually that great from this angle anyway...

I work for a regional firm and we take most paralegals on FTC's. We have hundreds of them and only half dozen training contracts a year, which are offered a year in advance and unfortunately, nothing is in the bag when it comes to being offered one because they are so sought after (as I'm sure you know!).

It's difficult to complain about the lack of supervision now the decision has been made not to offer you a training contract so I would take the experience you've gained and build on it at your next firm. In future, always speak up if you hace any issues so they can be addressed straight away and you can get the support you need to develop.

They are lawyers! Of course it's going to sound to their advantage! Good luck with future jobs.

Never ever diss the boss! Even if you are right, if you need an actual job or just a reference, they are your boss and as such, will be consulted at some point.