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Original poster

'Aspie' told to go home from work last night; has received a text this morning saying he's sacked -for going home.

38 replies

WomanScorned · 21/05/2014 08:44

I have no idea where he stands - can anyone point us in the right direction, please?

My son is 20, and has Aspberger's. Despite his extreme anxiety, he wants to work, and has been working in a discount store for almost a year. It's a crappy minimum wage job, only 8 hours contracted, but he averages 20-40. The set up is unprofessional; racist, homophobic remarks from the manager, wages late, hours changed at the last minute, staff notices with the f-word on, etc.

Last night he went in from 3-midnight, having been texted yesterday morning asking him to go in, even though it was his day off.

A new area manager arrived at 9pm and gave my son a task. According to my son, this man checked on him at 10, told him he wasn't working fast enough, and that he may as well go home. He had called over 2 colleagues to watch my son work, making comments to them over his head. So, he signed out and came home.

This morning, he received a text from the deputy manager, saying he has been sacked, but that she "isn't having it".

He's had only really positive appraisals, they appreciate that he keeps his head down and gets in with the work (he's always first choice for overtime/stock checks, for this reason) and he's well liked.

The job exacerbates his anxiety, the money is rubbish, and he would/could get as much on benefits. He's going to the GP today, anyway, to get his meds increased.

I feel really sorry for him,cast he's been awake all night worrying about his work record/reference. :-(

OP posts:
Original poster
WomanScorned · 21/05/2014 08:46

as, not cast

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ThinkAboutItTomorrow · 21/05/2014 09:08

Poor guy, sounds awful.

So someone said, 'you may as well go home' and he took it more literally than was intended? I can picture someone haranguing / bullying saying 'yes, go on, go home, it's not worth you staying' etc. they sound nasty enough.

I guess they are saying he walked out on the job and that may count as gross misconduct so they feel they are entitled to fire instantly. They still need to do it through a procedure more appropriate than a text.

I think there needs to be a meeting with them to clarify that your son genuinely misunderstood and took it as an instruction to go home. He didn't just have a strop (which is probably what the area manager thinks if he is new and doesn't understand your son's aspergers, and is a total arse from the sound of it). What is clearly a 'joke' or sarcasm was misconstrued due to a disability. Not sure if this is covered by anti discrimination legislation - hope so.

I think he should look for a more supportive environment though. easier said than done.

Original poster
WomanScorned · 21/05/2014 09:19

Thanx. for responding.

Yes, he definitely thought he was being sent home.

Any idea where to look, to see if this would be covered by anti discrimination legislation.

He won't cope in a meeting without support.

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drivenfromdistraction · 21/05/2014 09:31

I am sure that disability discrimination laws would cover this - accommodation should be made (for example, clear instructions). It should also cover your son having someone (eg you) with him in any meetings about this issue. I would contact the Citizens Advice Bureau.

Selendra · 21/05/2014 09:34

What a horrid environment for him. Some area have agencies aimed at getting people with disabilities into appropriate work for them - they provide support/training for employer. Could you see if there is anything like that near you? It doesn't sound a good place for him to go back to. I know someone who's used this one: www.kirklees.gov.uk/community/health-care/learningdisability/REAL/real2.shtml maybe your council does something like that.

Hogwash · 21/05/2014 09:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

weatherall · 21/05/2014 09:37

Sounds like he is better off away from there.

See this as an opportunity for something better.

LadyWithLapdog · 21/05/2014 09:37

What a horrible environment. I'd second getting CAB advice. Good luck. It's unbelievable things like this can happen.

GotMyGoat · 21/05/2014 09:40

I second ACAS - Might it be worth your writing a letter with your son to clarify that he took the instruction literally due to his disability?, and then quoting relevant bit of the equality act that no one should be discriminated against because of their disability etc.

Area manager sounds like a complete arse.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 21/05/2014 09:41

Oh bless him Sad. DS1 has Asperger's and I can picture the scenario in my head.

In the long run, he needs to be working in a more supportive/just generally nicer environment. If he enjoys working in a shop (and it sounds as though he is good at his job), could be apply to other chains/stores, using the Deputy Manager who "isn't having it" as a reference?

My overwhelming urge would be to go in & give the Manager a piece of my mind and point out a few laws to him! However, your DS would probably be rather embarrassed about that and of course, he needs to be dealing with adult situations himself (as hard as that is for the parent).

I don't think they can fire him by text either. Has he has any previous verbal or written warnings that you know of? However crappy the Manager, there is still procedure to be followed legally surely?

fubbsy · 21/05/2014 09:42

If he has been working there for less than a year, he doesn't have many employment rights. It doesn't have to be 'gross misconduct' for them to be able to fire him.

He does, however, have the right to be free from discrimination. Proving discrimination is not easy, though. IIWY, I would try phoning ACAS for advice - 08457 47 47 47.

Original poster
WomanScorned · 21/05/2014 09:52

Wow, thanx for all the responses.

There is a Disability Employment Servive, locally. I'll contact them.

He's had no verbal or written warnings. He'd never met this man before. He says he's

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FidelineandFumblin · 21/05/2014 09:58

NAS have a employment advice service called Prospects Even if they can't directly help, I bet they can offer expert signposting.

Is it a large employer?

Original poster
WomanScorned · 21/05/2014 10:01

(oops, pesky pre-schooler pressed send)

I contacted head office at Xmas time, as the manager hadn't done the wages on time, so put up a notice informing everyone that they would get that month's pay in with January's. The manager wasn't happy and told my son that it was "none of your mum's business; HO should have told her to fuck off".

It is so difficult. I know he's an adult, but he's still so young/naive/sensitive, and I want to protect him. :(

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HaveYouTriedARewardChart · 21/05/2014 10:08

Our local Sainsbury's employs quite a lot of people with disabilities and learning difficulties. Don't know if this is a nation-wide thing for them but maybe that would be a good place to look for another job?

Original poster
WomanScorned · 21/05/2014 10:11

It's a nationwide store (similar to B&M, Poundland)

I don't want him there, but neither do I want him to feel any more useless than he already does.

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napoleonsnose · 21/05/2014 10:17

They sound like a really shitty employer. I'm a union rep as as far as I am aware they would need to follow the disciplinary procedure before firing someone. I assume they have got one? If they call him into a meeting he would be allowed to be accompanied by someone (you, if necessary). The employer needs to follow a fair dismissal procedure, even if they do think your son has committed an act of gross misconduct. This would mean looking at all the evidence and allowing him to respond before making a decision. YY to speaking to ACAS - they do give excellent advice.

FidelineandFumblin · 21/05/2014 10:17

It's a nationwide store (similar to B&M, Poundland)

Well if you get to the point of a petition/email campaign/boycott, let us know and we'll rouse the aspie-mum army network in support Smile

napoleonsnose · 21/05/2014 10:21

Is your son in a union? USDAW is the union for shopworkers. Its probably too late to join now though, but you could ring them and see if they would help anyway if he became a member today.

Original poster
WomanScorned · 21/05/2014 10:29

Thank you for all the advice/support. He was only diagnosed at 18, so we'be not really had much support, beyond the diagnosis.

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Original poster
WomanScorned · 21/05/2014 10:36

Apparently, he was told when he started that there is no union!

I'll check out all the links, and contact Sainsburys.

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SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 21/05/2014 11:40

Yes, both of our local Sainsbury's stores employ people with disabilities too.

And in response to the Manager's comments about the Christmas wages - if he hadn't fucked the wages up, you wouldn't have needed to get involved!

Grrrr.

Has he had any further contact with the store yet?

Original poster
WomanScorned · 21/05/2014 11:47

No, no contact yet. He's just gone to the GP, as he has a meds review and is going to ask for them to be increased. Much of his anxiety is due to work, anyway. I'd just as soon he didn't need meds just to cope with being in that environment, though. I cant go with him today, but have done bullet points to remind him what he wants to tell her, as he clams up.

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Ubik1 · 21/05/2014 11:57

Oh thus sounds very familiar. I've a close relative with aspergers and he has struggled with work even though he has a degree from a good university, is friendly and hardworking in anOCD sort if way.

Part if the problem is that the sort of entry-level jobs on offer are badly paid and poorly managed which is stressful enough even if you don't have aspergers.

Have you looked at jobs in public sector with proper management and training structures? Hospital porter? Something like that? These organisations generally seem to accommodate people with additional needs much better.

My relative as terrible social anxiety. He left his last cleaning job after falling out with a colleague who drove off and left him to walk home. The world's a confusing place Sad

So sorry thus happened to your son. I would name and shame the bastards.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 21/05/2014 12:05

I would name & shame them too. They don't deserve protection by the sounds of it.

DS1 has already decided that he doesn't want to work with lots of people and has been offered a place at college to take a course in carpentry. He is fine working 1:1 with someone, as the social 'rules' are much less complicated, so the hope is he will be able to find an apprenticeship after his course (college have promised to help him with this) & then be a self-employed carpenter in years to come.

I admit I do worry much more about how he will cope with what the world throws at him, than I do about DS2 and DD who are NT.