To be employed or not to be employed?

[Innerconflict]

I have a 4 year old and a 12 month old. I am in total conflict with myself as to if I should work or not. After my first I worked full time and have been with my company over 10 years. Both my husband and I have similarly stressful, time demanding jobs. Plus I have to commute for (at best 45 mins each way) and travel overnight or entertain in the evenings most months. Plus I have to work 5 days (albeit a few shorter days to allow a couple of school pick ups).

To survive on one salary is (probably) do able- just, short term, if we are very frugal and eat into some reserves.

My conflict comes as to what I give up with my career/ salary/ car/ pension. Basically do I impact our financial security by doing what my heart wants to do (spend time with them in the day) for perhaps 2 years (until my youngest can go to our local nursery at 3). I would like to work 2-3 days a week but my company has flatly refused. With negotiating some early finishes, once they are both at school the job could work, especially considering my salary and perks.

So do I try to cope for a few years with the lack of time with my kids/ stress/ tiredness/ relentless chores/ travel or throw caution to the wind and provide a different life for the whole family? Anyone had a break for a couple of years and then managed to get back into a similar job?

I think the question is - how easy do you think it will be to return after a break in your line of work?

If feasible, then it could work. If it is cut throat and every day matters, then maybe not.

There do seem to be lots of women on theses boards that regret getting off the "tredmill" as it does seem very difficult to back where you were.

I have found that DS takes more note of things now he is nearly 6. I doubt he can remember much of the early years and nursery.

A job that offers the ability to do a couple of school pick ups sounds great.

Is moving jobs (after you return to current employers) an option? If you are in demand you could negociate pt?

I do want to work, just not full time. Part time ( apart from the couple of school pick ups) is not an option with my current employer. 3 days would be perfect for me right now.

I don't want to regret not taking time with my kids. Both parents in full time, demanding jobs leaves little time for much else. We both work evenings etc as it is just the hours we need to put in.