Need advice on how to approach this situation

[twisterlondon]

Really could do with some advice, I am a manager and one of my staff have complained that another member of the team spends all of their time talking on the phone and not pulling their weight.

Our calls are recorded, so I had a look to see if this was the case. All of the calls I found are to another line manager's mobile number.

I listened into one of these calls and it was literally 45 mins of the pair slagging off people within the company and how it operates.

At the end of the call, the subject turned onto me, and how my staff member is never able to see what I am up to as I keep some appts in my diary private, and that they suspect that it's because I am up to nothing at all. The manager responded by saying something along the lines of that it's because head is so far up my own arse, which isn't had as it's so large.

This has really upset me. I accept the comments about my arse and although it makes me feel sh*t I am trying to lose weight and if anything I will use this comment to spur me on, but the appt they referred to was when I was at the hospital (my DD has a life limiting condition and I am allowed time off work to attend appointments, my manager authorises these and the time is always more than made up).

I feel that I have nothing to hide and want to address this, this is not the first time this member of staff has questioned my ability to other colleagues and although I fully accept that as a manager not everyone is going to like me, I would not want these comments to continue and potentially ruin my reputation. Can anyone advise me the best way to approach this? e.g. should I go to HR and ask them to deal with it or approach them directly? Or should I just ignore it and move on?

Good god. That's terrible, just plain mean as well as unprofessional. We all bitch about colleagues from time to time but not like that.

I am normally a big advocate of tackle it yourself but in this case I would suggest taking it to HR. I can't see anyone who makes comments like that taking a direct approach appropriately seriously. They would likely use it for ammunition and react ore to the listening to calls than be deeply ashamed and horrified.

I agree HR would be a good starting point. It is fairly these employees are facing disciplinary action, so their advice will be invaluable.

Also, how supportive is your own line manager, and employer in general?

It must have been very hard to hear their conversations.

Absolutely outrageous behaviour and their comments are disgusting. I work in a small office and am a big bloke and I am amazed at how people always seem to be obsessed with other people's appearance, especially weight. Yet the amount of physical activity I do it's not me that is panting going up the stairs each morning. Our senior finance guy made a comment about my weight and soon shut up when I said my Nan's old saying 'I may be fat, but you're ugly and I can go on a diet" - cue hysterical laughter in the office. I bet they're no oil painting's either are they? This sounds like gross misconduct to me - too much time on the phone AND bullying. Are you able to make a copy of this call? I would, then write everything down from anything else you can remember, and then make a complaint. Take it to the person you trust the most at work and very calmly explain your grievance and proceed from there. Honestly I am flabbergasted in this day and age of what people get away with saying. I am sure it's partly because people don't realise how much trouble they could get in if someone made a complaint.