Worried about my sickness absence

[OrangeMochaFrappucino]

I am off sick from work today and really panicking. I am a teacher and have been off sick a lot recently. In June, I was off for two days for a sickness bug and then off the week after due to a miscarriage - I was back in for one day between those things so they are two separate absences. I then got pregnant again over summer and was signed off for a month from late September due to severe sickness. I have been back since late October but last night started vomiting again and am off today.

My worry is that I am part time anyway (three days a week) and my sicknesses have disproportionately hit my working days - if I had a two day vomiting bug on my days off it wouldn't matter but that hasn't happened! Add to this that my midwife only runs clinics on Thursdays 9-3 so all of my antenatal appointments require further time off and I feel like a really terrible employee. I had a previous pregnancy which involved similar amounts of time off due to hyperemesis. I don't plan to get pregnant again after this one!

When I look at how many days of this academic year I will actually have worked after so much sickness absence, antenatal appointments and then upcoming maternity leave, I feel cold. Although no one has discussed it with me, the frequency of my recent absences must have been noted.

In an ordinary (non pregnant) year I have probably been off a couple of times - I tend to get laryngitis every winter and usually get a sickness bug at some point in the year. It is pregnancy-related absence that has made my sickness record so poor. I am going to stress all weekend now about being off again today and to make matters worse, I have to request another afternoon off for a hospital appointment the week after next - I will have to submit the form when I go in on Monday. I have already rescheduled this appointment once to try to minimise the impact on work.

I try to be such a conscientious and hardworking employee, I really feel terrible about this level of absence. I wondered about arranging an appointment with the Head to discuss this - would this be a good idea?

Hi,
Sorry to hear you have been so poorly and that you have felt so much worry. I'm also very sorry that you had a miscarriage.
Just to let you know, pregnancy related sickness cannot be used against you in any way, as it would be discriminatory.
So basically that knocks off all of the time you have had off due to your miscarriage, and pregnancy related sickness. So this should take it down quite a bit?

Also, you are entitled to time off for pre natal appointments, so please don't worry about your hospital or midwife appts.
I had lots of time off during my pregnancy due to spd/pgp, ad was eventually signed off for good at 26 weeks.
It felt rubbish at the time but I had to look after myself and my baby and that is what you must concentrate on.
If you google pregnancy related sickness from work I'm sure you will be able to find lots of info that will make you feel better.
Therefore, I wouldn't bother seeing the head.

I know it can't be used against me but I suppose my fear is how I must be thought of and how this may make management look at me as a long term prospect. I think I feel that I must be viewed as unreliable and I can't deny that I am. I suppose I am not worried about action being taken but more what people may think of me.

Thanks though, I think you are right and it is reassuring to hear of other people who have had a lot of time off for pregnancy-related issues though I am sorry it happened to you.

I would assume they haven't bought it up with you because they don't have a leg to stand on?
Also, if you are a hardworking employee usually, I'm sure that is noted.
It does make you feel awful. But please try as much as you can not to worry about it, as if you are sick you are sick. And there is nothing you can do about it!
There would e no value to anyone I you were to drag yourself, puking everywhere and unable to work!
I know people say pregnancy is not an illness, but the side effects sure feel like it!
How many weeks are you now? How long do you have left til your maternity leave?
They even tried to make me take my maternity leave at 26 weeks when they are not allowed to start it before 34 weeks!

Twenty weeks and hoping that the sickness gets better - it has improved a lot and in my first pregnancy this was a real turning point so I am hoping that today is just a temporary relapse. I would like to work up to 36 weeks if possible but that may be overly ambitious. I think it's worrying as pregnancies are so variable and of course I have colleagues who have not missed anything like the amount of work I have during pregnancy so it's hard not to compare. I am feeling upset today as I thought I was so much better and it's frustrating to feel like this again!

If it's really bothering you, I'd have a word with your head. Just explain how worried your absences are making you and reiterate your commitment to the school, etc etc. It's what I would do I think.

Anyone who's been pregnant knows that they're all different. One friend was a sick as a dog with her DD, for almost the whole 9 months (well 7, she was a preemie) but with her DS she felt brilliant the whole time.

I agree with Stowsettler. Do you have a good relationship with the head? I just wouldn't want them to make them to make you feel worse if they were unsupportive. As we know some people have limited unstanding or sympathy when it comes to pregnancy, and don't deal with it a they should.

Especially when it comes to the hr side of dealing with things.

If you think it would make you feel better and they know the HR ins and outs then go ahead.

If you felt there was a way they could support you through it then that could be your angle. Would reduced hours help etc? They have a duty to support you.

I know that my work thought I just had a bit of a bad back, even though I was on crutches. It helped massively when my physio wrote them a letter and educated them. Then all of a sudden they were falling over themselves to help me!

Yes I think the Head would be sympathetic though at alltimes ccompletely fair and professional so she would be honest and I think clearly explain the sickness procedures to me - the policy is changing at the moment so although I know pregnancy-related absence will not count against me, I don't know what the general policy is. I would also like to reiterate that I am making appointments with minimal disruption in mind but that it is not always possible to schedule them in non-teaching time.

They don't need to make changes I don't think - if I am physically vomiting then I can't really be there teaching so reduced hours wouldn't help...I did think that the vomiting stage had passed. I think I just want them to know that this is temporary, that I am committed and that my sickness will improve when I return from maternity. I could go back to the doctor who was prepared to give me medication but as I had a few weeks respite I decided not to take it. If this continues I will reconsider.

Im so sorry about your miscarriage.
As an employer I can see tje difference between a usually dedicated employee who has a run of bad luck health-wise (and a miscarriage is a life event rather than poor health id argue) and someone who uses every sniffle to take a day off. This ks compounded for you by what you do. People where I work work from home when they feel awful or worry they migbt be contagious. Youre either in or off sick. Agree a quick word with head might be a good idea.

Good luck and please, please, try not to worry. I hope you are feeling much better soon, and the head puts your mind at rest.

Possibly pregnabcy hormones don't help either. I felt like the worlds biggest arsehole when I was pregnant, for no reason at all, and my anxiety was at its peak.