Going back to work when baby 6 or 10 months old

[Queazy]

Hi,
My baby is only a couple of months old. I have the opportunity to go for a new job that would offer less UK travel, and hopefully greater work life balance. Interviews are in November though and even holding to a notice period of 12 weeks, if I was successful I'd need to start when my baby is 6 months old. I'd agreed with my current employer that I'll go back there when the baby is 10 months old, but I'm concerned that I just can't fulfil the amount of travel expected of the role (my boss would offer some flexibility but ultimately the job does need to be done). My dilemma (which is extremely hypothetical at the mo!!) is...do I go for a job I've always wanted that starts earlier and offers more flexibility and benefits OR do I take the extra 4 months with my gorgeous DC and return to an employer that I'm not mad for, but at least know???

I would only do either if 4 days p/wk and salaries would be the same.

I hope some of that makes sense. Just not sure I want to go through an interview process unless def want the role anyway. I recognise there's a good chance I wouldn't get it anyway..!!!

Thanks for any views or advice

I totally understand and would feel the same.

I think you should take the job. Here's my tuppence worth:

Work/life balance over the long term is so important. In terms of time spent with your beloved dd, as well as simple logistics (childcare etc), a job with less travel and more flexibility has to be the better option.

One of the happiest, most well-adjusted children I know has a mum who went back to work full-time when she (the child) was 3 months old. The mum felt terrible but her DD was fine. And the mum has a job where she can spend more time with her dd overall than she might otherwise (teacher) so in the end, her long term working patterns have been more important than the initial wrench.

As others have said- and btw this is also what my ds's v experienced childminder thinks- a baby will find the transition harder at 9-12 months as that is when they have separation anxiety. I've just gone back to work, ds is 12m, and he is struggling.

Finally: your own happiness and wellbeing matters too, and not just because it benefits your dd to have a less stressed mum. I have been trying to tell myself recently that what I want for my children (to be fulfilled/happy in work and life) I should want for myself too.

Good luck!

Thanks so much. They've said they'll wait until March for me to start. Still feel sick thinking of leaving DD tho. Never happy....! xx

Wow, that's brilliant, Queazy- they obviously really want you.

Good luck with it all- I promise it gets easier.

And well done

Well done, great news! March is a long way off, your dd's world will have opened up by then, you may find you also feel more like 'you' as well as 'mummy'. So it may not be as sick-making as it seems now!

Well done!! I went back at 6 months, no issues for either of us x