Someone please help me think im going to have a meltdown at work :(

[welshgirly]

Have name changed.

I cant cope i think im going to have a meltdown at work.

I cant cope with the pressure and work load. I feel like I have no support from my work colleague she's gone off on holiday this week and left me with loads of work. She makes the job twice as hard as it needs to be. Ive been in the role for a year and its completely different to anything I have done before and I feel like I've made a big mistake.

Aswell as the work problems I have health problems, I have abdominal pain that the doctor cant seem to diagnose. Im waiting for my ct scan results and im feeling really anxious about what is wrong. My doctor thinks it might be my kidney, but im just so scared as there are so many organs in the abdomen and I have a family history of ovarian cancer.

I just dont know what to do i feel like im just going to break down and burst into tears at work and i really don't want that to happen :(

Hi Welshgirly. I found work really stressful last year just before Christmas and after a few episodes of waking with panic attacks I went to Doctors. They referred me on for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) which has made a real difference. I would recommend visiting Docs if you have prolonged periods of anxiety or worry/stress.

First of all, go and get yourself a glass of water or cup of tea. Breathe and think about what you need to do first. Don't think about anything else beyond that; baby steps.
When is your colleague back from holiday? Can you talk to your line manager about her performance and how it has impacted on you? Can you get signed off by your dr? It sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the moment and could do with some time to recouperate. Do you have anyone that can support you in RL?

I havent spoken to my line manager about things she always seems so busy and stressed its difficult to find the time to catch up with her.

I probably could get signed off sick but in my working life (12 years) Ive only ever had 2 days off sick and I just dont feel ill enough to be signed off. (I know that probably sounds really silly)

Whats RL?

RL is real life.
I agree with bigwuss - you need to talk to your line manager. She may be busy but it is her job to help you out.

Make a list of the things you need to do this week and how long you think they will take. Insist on getting some time with your line manager to discuss priorities as it is impossible to do the work of two people. And of your colleague has left things for you to complete that should have been done before, this is not your responsibility.

If you are feeling stressed, breathe deeply, pushing your diaphragm down and your abdomen out on inhalation, allowing yourself to focus on how you are feeling and concentrate on breathing out those stresses on exhalation. Breath in, feel the emotion, breath out, let it go, repeat until you feel calmer.

Oh yes, please, please talk to your line manager and tell her how stressed you are and what the problem is - then she can help you. I'd hate to think that one of my team was this stessed and anxious and hadn't told me. This is definitely the first step before going to the doctor's - at this stage being signed off will only delay things, and will not make the situation any better for you to come back to.

Thank you all for your advice, I will speak to my manager when I'm working with her next.
Daim your right going off sick will just mean that I'm running away from my problems.
I just need to try and work out what to say to her I don't want to come across like I'm moaning and I need to be strong dont want to burst into tears in front of her.

Mitsyb thanks for the breathing advice it really works :-)

I'm a manager and I know my team always think I'm busy but I'd always want to find time for someone who was feeling the pressure, even a twenty minute chat a few times a week helps. Also, I totally understand how you are feeling and when I get that way and feel utterly overwhelmed I tell myself 'eight hours is a long time'. Sounds naff but if you're focused and have a plan then you can get a LOT done in eight hours.

Please, please speak to your manager. I would hate to think my team could not speak to me.

Take the opportunity of your work colleague not being there to keep a daily log of tasks needing to be complete and any issues that have raised because things haven't been done else where.

I have a to do list and a wishful thinking list which helps me focus, something's need to be done straight away, something's just need responding to and then waited on and other things are desirable but don't impact the following day if not done.

Break your day down by the hour and keep it all written down factually to show to your manager, nothing wrong with admiring you are if ding things hard and asking for help, if you can think f a way to make things easier let your manager know as well.

Going to your boss and asking for a priority call on your tasks is a really strong and pro-active thing to be seen doing. It illustrates to your boss in a non-moany way that you have too much to do, and also indicates that you respect their judgement.

Good luck, take a deep breath and go and do something to take your mind off work today, then go in tomorrow feeling stronger.

As someone who's suffered mh issues as a result of horrific working conditions being signed off isn't running away if you really need it. Sounds like you may have a chance of not getting to this stage so good luck!