Work - do I really have to do this for the next 20 years???

[tazmo]

I have a FT job - doing 5 days in 4 (unofficially). When I was on mat leave, our head of dept left due to him having to report into a man half his age. My boss decided to leave (due to changes and personal reasons: lost a baby at 25 weeks). Out of 3 people who interviewed me, only one person is left but the place does not feel the same. Prior to these staff leaving, I felt I was going somewhere, allowed to pursue my ideas etc, even believed I may get promotion in a couple of years. But now I don't feel that. Half the original staff have left and the nature of the work is changing to less challenging work and the up new head of dept is so hierarchical. He has not spoke to me at all since he took over a year ago - not even to welcome me back from mat leave.

I do have the advantage of working from home which is handy with 3 children under 5. I just feel totally depressed with it all and have no drive. Should I look for another job? Bearing in mind I really did not enjoy my last job! A really crap company who discriminated due to being pregnant. This job is tons better - treat you well etc, but I am sooooooo bored! I feel I could easily get a promotion elsewhere but the grass is not always greener. I've been at my current company just over 2 years. I just can't believe I have to do this for the next 20 years! Plus have got into a real money trap with lots of credit card debt/debt due to 3 maternity leaves in such a short timeframe so I can't go part time! DH has a job but only earns 2/3rd of my salary and we need the dish for nursery! Sigh!!!!

You sound trapped and that is never a nice feeling.

Have you had a cheeky look at what is out there in your field? Is there anything you fancy? Sometimes the grass is greener.

Have you got an appraisal coming up where you could discuss your need for more challenge and the desire for a promotion? If not, can you bring this up with your boss?

I'm sorry I can't help, but I am in a very similar situation. I'm on mat leave but keep hunting for new jobs. But I'm not qualified to change direction, and nothing seems to pay as well. I said to DH just this week that I cannot bear the prospect of being in the same job for the next 30 years. I guess the only answer is to get as much as possible out of the job and keep eyes open for another. It's hardly the most inspiring or motivational position to be in.

I think you are setting your viewpoint at far too long a time horizon. Why do you think you 'have' to do this for the next 20 years? Of course that would be depressing for anyone. If you think of yourself as doing it for 1, 2, 5 years, how does it feel? Why not think in those terms and think about what you would like to happen after that?

I also feel a little bit trapped, because I work from home, I am well paid and with 4 children under 8 it isn't easy to find something so flexible!

I second the advice above, I am trying to see it as a 2 year plan - once my youngest child is in Y1 and my eldest in Y6, I think I will feel a little more courageous about moving upwards and onwards, even if it entails some travel and working away. I think it is very hard with very young children to take the risk.

Good luck, I know how you feel, but best to think short term!!