I work three days a week and have done since I went back to work after DC1 was a year old.
It took me ages to get used to it. It was exhausting. Looking back, I don't think I properly hit my stride at work until DC1 was 2 yo! And then there's all the organisation at home to factor in when you're out of the house for three days a week - food, laundry, bags packed etc.
My tips:
- Before you go back, sort out what you are going to wear. If your previous work wardrobe (which I imagine will be at least 2 years old, as you've been off for 14 months and were wearing maternity stuff before that) doesn't fit, or is dated or whatever, buy yourself some new things. And maybe a bag. Or make up. Whatever makes you feel good about how you look. It will give you confidence.
- Try to organise what you can at home eg regular online delivery, batch cooking so that you don't have to cook when you get in.
- Gradually, get your DS to spend more and more time with your cm. Are you happy with your choice of cm? Trust her and allow her to bond with him. If you can be satisfied that he is in a safe, caring and happy environment, he will be ok. It is a learning curve for him and for her too. Does he stop crying fairly quickly after you leave?
My DC1 would cry and cry when he was left in the morning, but he would always stop within minutes of being left. I was lucky in that DH did the handover, and I never had to see it, as I know it would have made me break down.
I am very pleased that i went back to work after DC1. It has been hard, and very tiring, and stressful, and at times I've felt that I was doing a shitty job at work (in terms of my performance) and a shitty job at home, and I couldn't work out what I was doing. Now I think I do a reasonable job at work and a reasonable job at home, most of the time, and anything on top of that is a bonus! Be kind to yourself, and give it a try. It does get better, I promise. And if it doesn't get better for you, you've given it a try. The things I enjoy about work are: the commute (to read the newspaper or my book - for a long time, the only time I read anything at all for me was on the train), popping out in my lunch hour to the shops for some retail therapy, drinking my Starbucks coffee whilst it is still hot, the office banter and being involved in other people's lives that are very different from mine as miost of my friends outside work have young families, using my brain (to an extent), meeting up with friends for lunch and maybe for a drink after work (very occasionally). I also really value my days at home.
I have heard of women staggering their return to work ie doing 1 day a week for X number of weeks, then 2 days, and building up to 3. is this an option for you? It was for me, but I decided it wasn't what I wanted - I wanted to see from the beginning how going back to work for the full three days would work.
Good luck.