1 dd & another on the way do I go back to work?

[Discomonkfish]

Hello all, I'm after some advice please. I have a daughter of 16 months and I'm pregnant due in October with baby no 2. At the moment my dd is in nursery 4 days a week. I'm wondering firstly what to do with dd when the new baby comes. I'm planning on keeping her in nursery to keep to her routine which will also give me time to cope with the new arrival, however, this will be quite a stretch financially while I'm on maternity. I was planning on taking 6 months mat leave. My hubby however thinks I should take dd out of nursery but I think she will lose her place.

The second dilemma is should I go back to work at all. The issue is that I am a telecoms / computer engineer and if I take a career break the technology will move so fast it would be difficult to catch up. Also I get a company car with my job so although all my wages will be gone on childcare I will still have my car which means I wouldn't have to buy one of my own.

Aside from all this I just don't know the right thing to do....I feel guilty going to work and putting my little girl in nursery but I also feel scared to give up my job completely.

I was confident in the choices I was making with my first baby but now I don't know what to do with myself....

Does anyone else have these feelings and do you have any advice for me......

Have you looked into the options available at work? Will they allow flexible/part time working, evening working or even a short career break (unpaid obviously)? If in career breaks they have to keep you up to date on things and so you could keep updated on technology.

IMO you need to look at the financial side - there is no point just going to work to pay nursery fees etc - it has to be worth your while and unless you are going to come out with a decent excess income after childcare costs then is it worth it?

I work 4 full days a week at present. It's a very male dominated industry so I was lucky to get that to be honest. Ever since I started they've been on at me to go back 5 days a week as though it's really hurting them resource wise.

Although they are a large company they are very old fashioned and any sort of remote working / career break would be a no no. I was thinking of maybe trying to go back 3 days a week but that will probably go down like a lead balloon...

The only other thing is your pension etc while I'm out of work you miss out on your contributions etc don't you....I suppose though it would only be for a few years...

Sound like the sort of dilemma that would keep me up at night!! Some ideas (but they could be useless!!)

Have you considered consultancy work? It would be less secure, but you would then keep your skills up to date?

Would DD1's nursery allow you to drop the hours she spends there for a period? That way you would give her some continuity with her nursery life, but also some more time with you and the new baby (and saving you some money).

All the best :)