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Feel rubbish at work

2 replies

cheerup · 13/07/2012 00:54

Years ago I had a good job which I worked hard at, did well, achieved lots and got promoted to a senior position in a competitive industry before I was 30. Then I had a blip, quite a big one. Not quite a breakdown but very nearly. And I chucked the job in, moved to the seaside and didn't work for while because I was able to support myself quite nicely. Anyway... fast forward 10 years. I feel like a complete failure, that I chucked my career away and now I'm hurtling towards 40, in a part-time junior management role with no prospects and even less credibility. I know I'm depressed because I'm not sleeping well, can't concentrate & forget everything and to top it all off I started having panic attacks again last week. I've just applied for a better job but my application was completely pants and everything I did of any note was at least 5 years ago when I was full time, and mainly it was 10 years ago when I had a decent job and tried alot harder. I'm sorry to moan and recognise this is mainly self pity and hindsight, I just want to stop feeling rubbish about myself for not being in a better place career wise. I keep telling myself that I've got two beautiful daughters and that should be enough and then I feel even worse because it just isn't for me.

OP posts:
YaYaBinks · 13/07/2012 02:30

It's ok to feel that but it's not true!

You have 2 daughters and are working and live by the sea!! Your skills made it possible for you to have choices and you can be a high flyer again if that's what you want.

Maybe you are ready to a new challenge? Have you thought about study?

You've thrown nothing away, some jobs demand too much and burning out isn't worth it.

Arana · 13/07/2012 03:04

Have you sought treatment for the depression/panic attacks? That would be my first step (speaking as someone only just holding a job down and suffering from depression). I would be much better at my job if I wasn't screwed up in the head.

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